


Cinderella Man

by peacensafety



Category: Choi Seunghyun | T.O.P./Kwon Jiyong | G-Dragon - Fandom
Genre: AU, Angst, F/M, Guns, Jiyong is an artist, M/M, Organized Crime, Seunghyun is a business man, They knew each other when they were little, but now they have no idea who the other person is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-21
Updated: 2012-09-23
Packaged: 2017-11-14 17:26:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 58,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/517717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peacensafety/pseuds/peacensafety
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seunghyun has lived a pretty rough life, but things begin to get better as he hires Jiyong as his personal assistant. Of course, there's a lot of misunderstandings and silly family drama that keeps trying to get in the way, but no one can stop true love, right?</p><p>I wrote this years ago, but I thought that maybe we could get some more GTOP lovin' up here on AO3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

His sketchbook lay almost forgotten as Jiyong stared out at the white beach, hypnotized by the rhythm of the tide. He had been surfing that morning and the salt lay encrusted in his light brown hair. The tempting scent of bagels and fried eggs tempted him to move, but it wasn’t enough motivation to get out of his screened in porch bedroom.

His friend Dongwook had bought the expensive sea-side house after working a top secret job that Jiyong called the Big Secret. It was only a Big Secret from Jiyong, but Jiyong told himself he didn’t care. He loved the fact that Dongwook let him live with him for rent free while he tried to sell his tee-shirts and painted sea shells to tourists while he painted large canvases for rich clientele on the side. Once he made it big, he’d pay Dongwook back for his generosity, and until that point, he bought the food and paid the electricity bills. 

He stopped staring at the ocean when he realized that Dongwook was arguing with someone on the phone. Jiyong swung out of the wicker basket chair that he had been zoning out in and followed the sound of Dongwook’s voice. 

“I told you, I can’t do it anymore,” Dongwook said. “No, it’s not that I want more money. God knows you have given me enough, I just… I can’t do it anymore. I told you why earlier.” 

Dongwook turned around and blushed to see Jiyong standing at the doorway of his porch bedroom, listening in on the phone conversation. 

“Yeah, I’ll find someone else for you. Let me ask around.” 

Jiyong waited for Dongwook to hang up the phone. “I don’t think that I’ve ever heard you yell at anyone,” Jiyong said, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

“He wants me to find him a boyfriend,” Dongwook said.

“Are you a pimp now?” Jiyong asked, secretly thrilled that he might be finding out about the Big Secret.

“I used to pretend to be this guy’s boyfriend so that his client’s wives would feel comfortable around him and not hit on him and ruin his business. He paid me well for it,” Dongwook said. 

“Why did you quit?” Jiyong asked. 

“There are reasons. You want to do it? He pays a hundred dollars an hour, plus tips if you have to touch him,” Dongwook said. “We could call Youngbae, see if he wants to do it…” 

“A C Note an hour? Plus tips?” Jiyong asked. How many tee-shirts would that print? “Fuck Youngbae, I’ll do it…” 

“It’s kind of dangerous, Jiyong, I shouldn’t have offered it to you. You’re still so innocent,” Dongwook wrinkled his nose thinking about Jiyong being exposed to the things that he had been exposed to.

“I could use the money,” Jiyong said, “and maybe I could even start paying rent. How many hours does he expect me to work?” 

“You know, sometimes I was gone for a few hours, sometimes I was gone for a week or even that one time I was gone for an entire month…”

Jiyong stared. “Why’d you only buy this house? You should be rolling in the cash…” 

Dongwook steadied his gaze at Jiyong. “I can’t talk about that. Just know that I have a pretty good bank account balance.” 

Jiyong nodded, a little surprised that his friend was rolling in the dough. “The government doesn’t check on that?” 

“Seunghyun filled out paperwork claiming I was his secretary.” 

“Seunghyun is the guy’s name? Why can’t he get a real boyfriend? Is he ugly?” 

Dongwook laughed, a bitter sound. “I don’t think he’s gay, Jiyong. He just wants someone with him so that he can do business.” 

“What business does he do?” Jiyong asked.

Dongwook wouldn’t meet his eyes. “You don’t need to know. It’s lucrative. Other than that… look, don’t stay with him long. Just help him out a few times until he finds someone permanent. And don’t fall in love with him.”

Jiyong snorted, an inelegant sound that Dongwook wanted to laugh at. “I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve, especially with some guy that I don’t even know. Unless he’s the most beautiful man on the planet, it’s highly unlikely that I’m going to fall for him.”

The look that Dongwook gave him at that declaration worried Jiyong just a little bit. He shrugged it off, though. Dongwook was pretty great looking, and Jiyong still hadn’t fallen for him even though they had lived together almost a year and a half now. 

Dongwook called Seunghyun back, telling him that his housemate would be taking the job and to be careful with him. He hung up the phone with a solemn face, staring at Jiyong as if he were expecting him to do some sort of performance. “The helicopter will pick you up in only a few minutes. Brush your hair and your teeth and make sure you have your deodorant on…” 

“What about my clothes?” 

“He’ll fix your clothing,” Dongwook shrugged. 

“He’ll what?” Jiyong started running to the bathroom, tying his hair back and brushing his teeth and washing his face. He winced at the salt granules falling out of his hair at that movement, but he was relatively clean as he stepped out of the bathroom to the rhythm of helicopter blades coming from the backyard. 

He was shocked to see a BlackHawk helicopter waiting for him, and Dongwook shoved him out of the door.

Jiyong sat alone in the back leather seats of the custom fitted Black Hawk. He could tell that it was used relatively often, not because it was worn but because there were objects strewn around the vehicle. There was a camera and a notebook, which was written in Korean so that Jiyong couldn’t understand it. He knew enough to speak, but he had never bothered learning the written language. He tried to sound out a few words but the vowels kept messing him up, and he put it aside so that he could pick up something else.

There was a suit hanging from one of the windows in a garmet bag. The pants were too long for Jiyong and the waist was proportionately narrow. The shoulders of the suit jacket were broad, and Jiyong figured that this Seunghyun probably had a pretty nice body… or at least it wouldn’t be fat.

He found a single black hair in the seats, and Jiyong liked the texture of it. He put it in the pocket of his board shorts so that he could keep it with him. 

The helicopter landed in Raleigh, the nearest city to the Outer Banks in North Carolina. He was met by a woman in a red pencil skirt, whose eyes physically undressed Jiyong in his tee-shirt, Chuck Taylor Converse high tops, and a tee-shirt of his own design. She made a few notes and then she led him to a white Maybach convertible. 

Jiyong couldn’t get over the vehicles that he was being driven around in. Why in the world would Dongwook give up this job? It made no kind of sense to Jiyong as he enjoyed the breeze trickling invisible fingers through his hair.

They went to a salon, first of all. Jiyong’s hair was shampooed and conditioned to get the beach out of his hair and he was given a few highlights and a few crucial pieces were cut off. The effect was that when he could move again his hair had a life of its own, and Jiyong had to keep twitching his head a little to keep the mess out of his eyes. 

The pencil skirt lady took him to a few boutiques and shoe stores, and Jiyong walked out of the stores in white Doc Marten combat boots, a military inspired button-up short sleeve shirt that was perfectly tailored, artfully ripped up jeans, and then pencil skirt lady took him to a jewelry shop.

Jiyong was shocked when he was given chunky white gold rings of all different designs, and the pencil skirt lady nodded her head before putting bright red rubies with platinum designs in his ears. 

“What if I lose one of them?” Jiyong whispered, kind of panicked. 

“Then Mr. Choi will buy you another one. This is only the beginning of the wardrobe we need to buy for you. You’ll be receiving clothing as Mr. Choi needs you to have them,” pencil skirt lady said. 

Jiyong stared at her as she led him back to the car, and they drove back to the airport. It took him a few minutes to realize, after he had sat down in his seat in the Black Hawk helicopter, that he wasn’t alone this time. 

Pencil skirt lady sat next to a tall thin man, who sat directly across from him, speaking into a microphone affixed to his ear. His voice was low and sexy, and Jiyong wondered what it would sound like whispering in his ear. He drew on a tablet in front of him, dragging windows off the page and looking into the camera at whomever he was communicating with. 

Jiyong felt a little lied to. Most everyone his whole life had told him that he was the most beautiful man they had ever seen, but this man was obviously the most beautiful man on the planet. Jiyong didn’t even know that men could look this good, because if all men had seen him they would go instantly gay at his obvious physical perfection.

Jiyong didn’t realize for the longest time that he was staring at the man. He had pale white skin and intriguing lips, his jaw line was slender but attractive. Jiyong wanted him to take off the sunglasses that were hiding his eyes, but he could tell that his eyebrows were thick and beautifully arched. His ears were just pointy enough to be cute.

The man was dressed from neck to wrist to ankle in beautiful gray fabrics, a suit that did nothing but tease the viewer with secrets that it covered up. His hands were gorgeous, his fingers only slightly longer than his palms, and if his thumb were any indication of how his dick was shaped Jiyong was in love. 

Seunghyun had put the tablet aside and was staring right back at Jiyong, who stuck his hand in his new jeans pocket to touch the hair he had found earlier. He wondered if it belonged to this man. 

“I’m Seunghyun Choi,” the man said, and Jiyong almost died at the sound of that deep instrument that was his voice. 

“Jiyong Kwon,” he answered, holding his hand out for Seunghyun to shake. When their skin touched, Jiyong swore he felt a shock, but Seunghyun didn’t seem to be affected by it at all. 

“Are you Korean American, too?” Seunghyun asked, leaning back in his seat.

Jiyong had to stop himself from crawling into the other man’s lap, wanting to nibble and lick his skin and take those damn clothes off. “Yeah, my family is from Seoul.” 

“Mine too,” Seunghyun smiled at Jiyong, and then he took his sunglasses off. 

Jiyong felt his heart fly out of the helicopter in self-preservation. Seunghyun was still smiling at Jiyong, who wished that he could make himself stop staring. 

“Look, I have a few things to explain about this job,” Seunghyun was saying, and Jiyong couldn’t look away from his perfect eyes. “We’re going to be meeting some dangerous people sometimes, and lots of them are highly territorial. That’s why I need you, because sometimes they are going to have girlfriends who are going to be interested in me. I need you to act like you’re really in love with me, and I’ll do the same with you. This will make my buyers think that I’m only not interested in their wives, but that I’d prefer to fuck them than their wives. They like that, it strokes their egos. Lots of my job is me acting like a whore, and I’ll probably say some pretty shocking things to you. Dongwook told me that you’re pretty innocent, which is okay with me ‘cause it’ll make me look like I’m corrupting you. My buyers like a little story to associate with me. Just… anything I say act like we’ve already done it or that you’re interested in trying it. Do you think that you can do that for me?” 

“What are you selling?” Jiyong asked.

“You don’t need to worry about that,” Seunghyun said, leaning back and putting his sunglasses back on. Jiyong almost whimpered at being deprived of the sight of Seunghyun’s eyes. “What you need to worry about is acting like I’ve fucked you seven ways to Sunday and that you loved it.”

Jiyong seriously doubted that he would have problems acting like that. The thought of this man fucking him wasn’t something that he was having to work hard at imagining. 

“Good, look at me like that. Good job,” Seunghyun said. 

Jiyong wished that he weren’t blushing at that, but Seunghyun thought he was acting. He wondered if this man wasn’t actually straight, and he hoped that the disappointment wouldn’t show on his face at the thought. 

“Look, everyone is going to call me TOP, because in the business, that’s my position. You can call me Seunghyun if you want, but make it kind of… you know, intimate or something. Try not to use my last name if at all possible, okay? Do you have a nickname?” 

“Sometimes my friends call me GD…”

Seunghyun laughed. “Yeah, we’re not calling you that. Ever. What’s it stand for?” 

“My name, Jiyong…” 

“Yeah, I can see that. I’m going to have to call you something else. What else could I call you…” and Seunghyun stared at him as if a name would appear out of thin air. “I think I’m going to call you my Butterfly. I called Dongwook my Se7en ‘cause he was lucky, but you’re just like a butterfly…” 

“Why do I need a nickname?” Jiyong asked.

“I don’t want them to find you when you’re done with this job,” Seunghyun said. 

“Why won’t GD work?” Jiyong didn’t really like the whole Butterfly nickname.

“Because sometimes, when the Gangster Disciples aren’t my clients, the Vice Lords or the Latin Kings or the Crips or the Bloods are…” 

Jiyong stared across the helicopter seating. What the fuck was he getting into?

The helicopter landed at a very nice white adobe style house surrounded by palm trees and a different colored ocean beach. Jiyong wondered where the fuck they were. Seunghyun led the way up the palm tree-lined walkway, and Jiyong tried not to notice how stiffly the man walked, or how his ass filled out that gray fabric of his suit. He must have failed though, because pencil skirt lady laughed at him a little. “We all stare,” she whispered to Jiyong, and he instantly felt like he had a kindred spirit with him. 

“What’s your name?” he was curious to know, because he couldn’t call her pencil skirt lady for the rest of their business relationship. 

“Amanda Seyfried,” the girl said. She shook her blond ponytail and her blue eyes sparkled. “He calls me Blondie.” 

“He really doesn’t want any of us to be called by our real names?” Jiyong asked.

“It’s his way of protecting us,” Amanda shrugged. 

Jiyong eye raped Seunghuyn’s legs, figuring that if he had been given permission to ogle that man he might as well take advantage of it. They sat down with some Hispanic men, and Jiyong tried not to be too surprised as Seunghyun started speaking Spanish with them. One of the men gestured at Jiyong, and Seunghyun too the opportunity to wrap his arm around the other man, kissing his forehead tenderly. “Mi mariposa,” he introduced Jiyong to the men sitting at the table. “Mi amor hermoso, la Mariposa,” Seunghyun said. 

Jiyong had no idea what Seunghyun was saying, but he figured it was good because he was getting kissed. He let himself look into Seunghyun’s eyes like he was the most amazing man on the planet, and he was fascinated when Seunghyun almost blushed after he stared at him. 

The men at the table laughed, and they continued laughing as some girls in barely-there bikinis showed up to drape themselves artfully over the men. 

Jiyong instantly saw how Seunghyun having a gay lover sitting next to him at those negotiations were helpful because the women’s eyes devoured his supposed lover, making their boyfriends and husbands laugh at them. Jiyong drew little circles on Seunghyun’s knee while he was speaking in rapid fire Spanish with the men. He loved the feel of the other man’s muscles and he had to stop himself from stroking that thigh, forcing himself to be content with drawing little shapes on his knee. 

The women looked at the two of them speculatively, discouraged as Seunghyun gave very timed and planned responses to Jiyong’s seductions. Jiyong wanted to do something that would make him jump, turn him on unexpectedly, but he was a little scared of the Hispanics that looked like they were armed. 

The men signed pieces of paper that Amanda held out for them, and Jiyong was surprised when she spoke fluent Spanish, too. 

The men gestured for all the paperwork to be finished, and Jiyong was surprised when Seunghyun pulled him onto his lap like the other men had their women lounging on their laps. He fed Jiyong little sips of wine, and he made small talk with the men. It only took a few minutes of socializing and then someone called Seunghyun. He gave the tablet to Amanda, who informed Seunghyun in English that they had another appointment, and then all three of them were climbing back into the Black Hawk helicopter.

“Let’s see,” Seunghyun said, pulling a roll of cash out of his back pocket. “That’s $700 for seven hours worth of work, an extra fifty for some of those looks you were giving me, and then fifty bucks as a signing bonus. You did great, butterfly,” Seunghyun smiled at Jiyong. 

Jiyong never felt cheaper than he did at that moment. Amanda gave him a sympathetic look, but she worked on typing something up on the tablet, her fingers hitting the screen quickly. 

When Jiyong was dropped off back at Seunghyun’s house, he felt awful. 

Dongwook didn’t say anything, but he made him a mug of hot chocolate and tucked him into bed. 

 

Seunghyun stared out the window of the 42nd floor office building. He only owned fifteen floors, but his business was expanding faster than ever before, and for once some of his business was even legit.

“I think he’s a good addition,” Seunghyun winced, knowing he was trying to distract himself from the issue at hand. “Do you think he’s a good addition?” 

“I think he’s a marvelous surprise, sir,” Amanda said, cleaning the desk top off with blue spray and wiping with a decorative paper towel. She hated spots.

“Do you think he’s going to make a convincing lover?” Seunghyun thought about the way the sun had made love to Jiyong’s skin.

“The only way you two could have been more convincing was if you two would have had sex right in front of us all,” Amanda said, wondering if the desk was really as streak free as the commercials claimed. She figured no birds would be flying into the black lacquer polish to prove the advertisers’ promises though.

“Maybe we need to spend more time together so that he’s more comfortable around me,” Seunghyun contemplated out loud.

“Of course, I wouldn’t complain if you two did go at it in front of us all. That would be pretty hot. On his side, anyway. You would just make that awkward,” Amanda said as she replaced the desk organizers on the shining surface.

“You’re right, Amanda,” Seunghyun turned to face his assistant. “I should ask him out. Where do you think I should take him?”

Amanda knew when he boss’s focus had changed, so she kept her smartass remarks to herself. “I would probably take him to one of the seafood restaurants overlooking the ocean so he’s on his own turf and therefore more comfortable with you.” 

“Should I invite Dongwook along?” Seunghyun asked.

“No,” Amanda said firmly. She knew how cruel it would be to Dongwook to make him watch Seunghyun in all his awkward glory begin to court his housemate. Amanda could at least prevent her clueless step-brother from grinding a man’s heart into dust. 

Seunghyun didn’t understand Amanda’s negative reply, but he trusted her more than any other person on the planet. She was his step-sister, after all. They had been loyal to each other above all others for fifteen years now. 

“Should I call him?” Seunghyun asked her, seeking advice. 

Amanda studied her younger step-brother. She had fallen in love with him when her father had married his mother, but it had transformed from a romantic love to a friendship/sibling love very quickly. Now, she wanted more than anything to keep his dream, this business, alive and thriving, even if it was because of personal reasons. Part of that was keeping Seunghyun happy.

“I have a better idea,” Amanda declared. She started detailing a plan for Seunghyun to follow. He listened to her every word, and then he proceeded to follow it down to the letter.

Jiyong sat on the sidewalk in front of the beach entrance, shivering on the thin towel that he had spread out, displaying his tee-shirts and his sea shells. He had already made forty-five dollars that day. Nothing compared to what he had pulled in with Seunghyun, but he already considered that to be a fluke. There was no guarantee Seunghyun was going to call him back, so he was going to have to keep working at becoming a famous artist.

The breeze coming in off the ocean was cool. Jiyong pulled the longs sleeves of his white tee-shirt over his hands and wished he had remembered to bring long pants to change into after surfing this morning. It wouldn’t matter in a few minutes when the sun had dried his shorts to his legs and the temperatures rose ridiculously high. He stared at his sand encrusted toes until a shadow fell over them. 

Jiyong looked up with what had to be one of the most genuine, brilliant smiles Seunghyun had ever seen, but his heart fell when Jiyong stopped smiling as soon as he realized who he was. 

Seunghyun instantly felt self-conscious and nervous. He was never good at acting outside of business parameters. 

‘Look around,’ Amand had told her business-genius socially-retarded brother, ‘make an observation about something that you see.’

“There’s a lot of bird shit here,” Seunghyun said. 

“What?” Jiyong blinked up at Seunghyun, and for the second time he wanted to touch the younger man’s eyelashes. How was the most beautiful man he had ever seen selling art at the beach and not modeling for some exotic fashion magazine?

“On the ground. There’s a lot of bird shit on the ground,” Seunghyun repeated himself. Now he sounded like an idiot to his own ears. 

Jiyong’s amazing smile returned, and Seunghyun had to take a step back or be blinded. “Welcome to the beach, boss. Tourists fed the seagulls and the seagulls return their offerings on the sidewalk.” 

Seunghyun found himself smiling back at Jiyong at the sheer ludicrousness of their conversation. 

“Want to sit down and help me sell sea shells on the sea shore?” Jiyong quipped. 

Seunghyun sat awkwardly on the thin blanket while Jiyong hawked his wares to passersby. He noticed that Jiyong lowered his prices for young couples and raised them for more affluent individuals and teenagers. Seunghyun thought that was kind of romantic of him, and soon he was smiling and helping Jiyong sell the things on his blanket. It didn’t take long with Seunghyun’s silver tongue to sell every single thing.

“I’ve never sold everything on my blanket before,” Jiyong said as he folded it up neatly and put it on top of his surfboard. “You’re really good at this, TOP,” Jiyong couldn’t stop grinning at him. 

Seunghyun grinned back at him. He had smiled so much that day his face hurt. “Let me take you to lunch in celebration,” he requested. 

“I’m supposed to offer, since you helped me out,” Jiyong counter-offered. “C’mon, let’s put my board and my blanket up, and we can go get food.” 

Seunghyun was a little surprised at Jiyong’s forty year old VW van and the amount of sand that came pouring out of the open back doors. He was very nervous as Jiyong offered to drive them to a little place that he knew and apologized for Seunghyun’s busted seatbelt. Seunghyun held on to the busted seat belt for dear life as Jiyong swerved, waving out the window at almost everyone in town who all seemed to know him and consider him their best friend. 

They got their dinner at a seafood restaurant where Jiyong knew the manager and half of the wait staff, and it was apparent that he had gone to high school with most of them or their brothers or sisters or cousins. Jiyong and the manager of the restaurant conferred in whispers for a minute, and then the manager nodded and sent Jiyong up the back steps where Seunghyun was shocked to find himself in a tiny screened in room that made them feel like they were right on top of the ocean. 

The room kept swaying with the tide, and Seunghyun was a little nervous at first but seeing as how Jiyong seemed completely laid back about the situation he decided that he would be okay with it. 

The manager himself brought up their food, and Seunghyun didn’t even order. They had tons of shrimp and crab cakes and lobster with a mellow red wine that Jiyong didn’t drink, preferring pineapple juice over the free alcohol. And shockingly to Seunghyun, the entire thing was free. They were only interrupted a few times when various waiters or waitresses came to steal some of the food for themselves, which Jiyong shared with a big smile. Seunghyun was introduced as Jiyong’s friend from out of town, and he learned so many names that it was all in one ear and out the other by the time it was over. 

They ate so much food that they hurt, and then Jiyong took them back to his car. “Did you drive to the beach?” Jiyong asked. 

“I drove in. I parked my car by the beach…” 

“Which parking lot?” Jiyong asked, turning on his turn signal to go back to Atlantic Beach. 

Seunghyun couldn’t remember, and then he couldn’t remember which car he brought, so he and Jiyong were stuck circling parking lots while Jiyong laughed his ass off, Seunghyun pushing the button on his key chain that would unlock the car doors. “I’m sorry,” Seunghyun apologized. “I’m really bad with things like this. Amanda usually takes care of stuff like this for me.” 

“How long has she been with you?” Jiyong asked, still giggling. 

“Since I was… nine?” Seunghyun asked out loud. 

Jiyong was startled. “Is… are you two together then?” 

“No, my mom married her dad. So she’s my sister. She’s had my back since I can remember. She’s three years older than me, but she beat up my bullies and fought our parents in my defense. I picked my college because of her…”

“Sounds like you two mean a lot to each other,” Jiyong said. Was Seunghyun in love with her and just not being honest with himself about it?

“There it is,” Seunghyun said, referring to some lights flashing down an almost deserted parking lot. 

“Why did you come today?” Jiyong asked, parking next to Seunghyun’s Porche 911 Turbo. It was shiny and black with red details. If Jiyong hadn’t been drowning in Seunghyun’s money already, he would have been completely shocked. 

“Oh yes,” Seunghyun said, patting the pockets of his pants like there was something that was going to appear in his hand to give him an excuse. “I um… I wanted to talk to you about working with me again,” Seunghyun tried not to wince. He didn’t want to make this day about work. This day was going to be written down in his Journal and read and reread for years to come, memories of one perfect day.

He was staring at the ground so he didn’t see Jiyong’s face fall. “Oh, I thought I was just a fill-in until you found someone permanent?” 

“What?” Seunghyun asked, startled. He looked up to search Jiyong’s face. “No, I thought you were my new lover?” 

Jiyong’s breath caught in his throat for all of thirty seconds before he could breathe again. “Dongwook said I was just temporary until you found someone more… professional…” 

Seunghyun didn’t want a professional. He wanted Jiyong. “I would like if it was you,” Seunghyun said, pulling on his collar. “I think that you and I work well together. We’re good at faking it together.”

Jiyong might have stayed if it weren’t for that last sentence. “It’s not my usual line of work. I don’t even know what you do…” 

“I’m a business man. I take advantage of business opportunities,” Seunghyun said. 

“It’s dangerous if you don’t want to use my real name…” 

“Yes. Yes it’s dangerous. But I still want you… to work for me,” Seunghyun’s brain kept him in self-preservation mode. He had to make Jiyong think that it was about the job, because he didn’t think that Jiyong would be interested in him. He had to do anything to make Jiyong want to keep working for him. He obviously didn’t want to hang out with Seunghyun as friends if he asked why Seunghyun had come by that night, anyway. 

Jiyong paused, trying to figure out why this man would want him and not a professional. Maybe it was because he wasn’t a professional. Dongwook wasn’t a professional, and Seunghyun had obviously liked him well enough to keep him for almost an entire year. Or maybe Seunghyun was keeping Jiyong because it would make Dongwook stay in contact with him. Maybe Seunghyun really wanted Dongwook? 

Jiyong sighed. It was good money. He could really use some new art supplies, and he was going to have to get a new vehicle soon, his old van wasn’t going to last much longer. “Yeah, I’ll work for you.” 

Seunghyun smiled, but Jiyong didn’t feel like smiling back so the smile fell. “Well then… um…” Seunghyun ran a hand through his hair. He pinched his lower lip and he cleared his throat. “I’ll send the helicopter around tomorrow about noon? You’re going to need some things for your job, so I’ll make sure that Amanda sets you up with the right things, okay?” 

Jiyong nodded. “Yeah, sure,” he said. 

He and Seunghyun made awkward good-bye noises at each other, and then Seunghyun was gone. Jiyong sighed, driving his van through the one street in the middle of Atlantic Beach to his and Dongwook’s home. He parked the van in the carport attached to Dongwook’s house, and got out, throwing his blanket into the outdoor washing machine. 

He stumbled his way into the beach house, exhausted since he had been up since four thirty that morning to go swimming, full from the food he had gotten after he told the manager that he thought that Seunghyun was The One that he wanted to impress for the rest of his life, and then heart broken when he realized that Seunghyun didn’t feel the same way about him. 

Dongwook wasn’t even home to complain to about Seunghyun when Jiyong turned on the lights and got himself a glass of Jack Daniels. He took a quick shower, promising that he was going to get himself some sort of drain catcher the next day to keep all the sand and salt out of Dongwook’s pipes. 

He swung into his cot, promising that he was going to actually sleep tonight. He shut his eyes against the sound of the surf, rocking a little bit back and forth as his eyelids got heavier.

How was he going to resist Seunghyun the next day? Would Seunghyun even show up? Maybe Seunghyun would call in the morning to see if Dongwook wanted to come along, and then when Jiyong was getting all prettified for him the two of them could sneak off. Maybe Dongwook quit because Seunghyun didn’t want him in danger anymore. 

So was it really the money that had him doing this job? No, Jiyong had to admit. He wanted Seunghyun. 

There. He had said it. He wanted Seunghyun. The initial attraction was easy enough to admit to, anyone with eyes would be attracted to Seunghyun so Jiyong didn’t feel bad admitting that he was attracted to him. It wasn’t just the want to possess his beauty though. Jiyong wanted his smile and his dorky laugh. He wanted those times tonight when Seunghyun paused before answering Jiyong’s questions to be filled with thoughts of him. He wanted memories with Seunghyun like Amanda had. 

Maybe Jiyong could use this job to convince Seunghyun that he wanted Jiyong, too. Maybe Jiyong could just flirt a little here or there, and maybe he could take advantage of their next undercover date thingy to kiss Seunghyun’s skin. He wanted to attack that one patch right below Seunghyun’s ear, it had been calling to him all day and Jiyong had fought with the desire to run his tongue over it all night. It had been the most wonderful terrible sensation Jiyong had ever felt. 

Jiyong sighed with frustration, wanting to hit something but he was frustrated at not being around anything solid enough to do it. Maybe he could use some of the money he was making with Seunghyun to buy himself a real bed. It would make moving to a new house harder, but a mattress might just be the thing that he needed. 

Damn, wouldn’t he love to share a mattress with Seunghyun? Jiyong briefly thought about what he would do with Seunghyun on a mattress, wondering if there would be anything nearby to tie the man up with so that he would be at Jiyong’s mercy, and he felt his face turning so red that he had to cover it up with the stuffed monkey he slept with every night. After all, he had told Mr. Thompson, the manager of the restaurant, that he thought Seunghyun was The One, Jiyong tried to justify his thoughts.

He was thinking about buying a mattress for the man, though. He might as well admit that to himself. He wondered what it might mean. Was he ready to settle down for this man? What was Seunghyun turning him into? Someone who wanted another person permanently in his life? 

Jiyong wasn’t like that, he hadn’t had anyone in his life on a permanent basis since… well, he couldn’t remember. There was that foster home… he had lived there for three years, but he really couldn’t remember their names. He thought that they were nice people, but he had been seven when he left them. Then it had been a series of foster homes and state-run homes and temporary homes and other fancy words for kid Hotel California that he kept getting sent back because of various reasons. Jiyong had never really misbehaved, but he never connected with any of his foster family because it was never permanent. 

Jiyong sighed. Foster kids did not make good family members. He had been told that over and over again, and even other foster kids had made jokes about it. Why don’t families want to keep their rented kids? No one likes to buy something used and thrown away. They didn’t know how to be family, so they would never have one. Jiyong knew the rules of throw away kids who used big black trash bags for their suitcases. 

Getting involved with Seunghyun wasn’t going to do anything but cause heartache. Jiyong should just take advantage of what the man was giving him and go with it. If it led to some physical interaction, Jiyong should just enjoy it while he had it. He could read whatever situation Seunghyun put him in and keep himself safe, figure out exactly what everyone in the room wanted, and perform admirably. 

Of course, that didn’t stop him from thinking about buying a mattress for Seunghyun. 

 

Dongwook decided to come along for Jiyong’s major shopping trip with Amanda. He offered his opinion on the cuts and colors of the clothing that Amanda had him try on, and he joked with Amanda when Jiyong was in the dressing room.

Jiyong noticed that Amanda and Dongwook actually got along pretty well, which was strange because Dongwook normally didn’t like girls at all. They were like two peas in a pod when it came to their snarky, sarcastic sense of humor. Jiyong sometimes had problems breathing when they went on their imaginary scenarios of world domination and the ways that they would make the world a better place because he was laughing too hard at their foolishness. 

The shopping trip took all afternoon, and Jiyong was pretty disappointed that Seunghyun wasn’t anywhere nearby to be seen. Amanda mentioned that he was working with a new account, a fact that made Dongwook’s ears perk up for some reason, but Jiyong was just disappointed that he wasn’t there with them. 

Amanda took them to her condo for dinner, and Jiyong leaned up against her kitchen counter while she and Dongwook moved around the kitchen in a practiced dance. It was obvious that the two of them had spent a lot of time together; they were so comfortable with each other. 

Jiyong nibbled on a green apple as he chatted with them and asked Amanda questions about his job. She told him how he was to act around certain accounts and how to respond if anyone ever asked him questions about his background. She encouraged him to lie about his background, even cautioning against admitting what state he was from. She told him to tell everyone that he was from Washington State, but a small town, not Seattle or anything.

Jiyong had never been outside of North Carolina, so he laughed a little at trying to fake like he had been somewhere else. Amanda and Dongwook both were a little surprised at that declaration.

“Didn’t you go on family vacations when you were a kid?” Dongwook asked, surprised. 

“Nah,” Jiyong said. He didn’t bother explaining that foster kids weren’t allowed to leave the state they lived in without a judge’s express approval. He had been kicked out of two foster homes because his families had wanted to go on vacation, so he had a few issues with people who wanted to leave the state for something like a vacation.

“What did your family do on vacation?” Amanda asked him, surprised. Her father had taken her everywhere, so she was surprised that other people had different experiences.

Dongwook rolled his eyes. “Not everyone grew up with a billionaire for a father, Amanda,” he said. 

Jiyong laughed. “That’s true,” he said, eating some of the food that Dongwook had turned his back on.

“What did your father do?” Amanda asked Jiyong. 

“I don’t know,” Jiyong said. He stuffed his mouth really quickly so that he wouldn’t have to answer any more questions. 

Dongwook looked at Jiyong speculatively. “You know, I’ve known you for a year and you never talk about your dad. Your mom, either. We’ve gone to eat at my parents’ house once a month and we’ve never even brought up your parents.” 

“Nothing to bring up,” Jiyong said. “What’s the recipe for this sauce? It doesn’t taste like any other spaghetti sauce I’ve ever had.” 

“I put cinnamon and dark chocolate in it,” Amanda said. “One of my Mexican nannies taught it to me when I was a little girl, before Seunghyun’s mom came.” 

“What’s Seunghyun’s dad do?” Jiyong asked casually. 

“He’s in the same business as my dad. That’s how our parents met,” Amanda said glumly. “At least, that’s how our parents got divorced and then remarried. To each other… I mean, my parents didn’t get remarried to each other, dad got married to Seunghyun’s mom, and mom just took the alimony and left, and I think Seunghyun’s dad got into another line of business.” 

That was awkward, Jiyong thought. He was kind of sorry that he asked. 

“So, Seunghyun’s mom sees you as her daughter then?” 

“Oh yes, Mae and I get along famously. We didn’t at first because we were both shy with each other, but then…” Amanda blushed. “I can’t tell that story to boys…” 

“You might as well, you started it,” Jiyong said. 

“I kind of panicked ‘cause I got my period and I thought that I was dying, and she just laughed and laughed, and then she told me how to take care of it and took me out for ice cream and bought me my first pair of high heels.” 

Dongwook laughed. “That’s still how you take care of your period,” he said. “Ice cream and high heels.”

“I know,” Amanda grinned, and Dongwook grinned back at her. 

Jiyong decided they were probably like best friends, and Amanda liked Dongwook and Seunghyun together, too, which is why she was so supportive of Jiyong’s working with him. They just wanted Dongwook out of danger. It was fine with him, it wouldn’t be the first time someone used him and it probably wouldn’t be the last; he was pretty sure that no other time in his life were people going to be so honest about it and pay him as well. 

The rest of the evening was filled with laughter and jokes, and Jiyong thought he had probably never had such a good time in his entire life just sitting and eating a meal with someone before. Except for that one time with Seunghyun, but Jiyong wasn’t going to think about that again. The evening had been delightful, and Jiyong had a blast. 

He helped Amanda clean up as Dongwook fixed one of the light fixtures in her bathroom. He noticed that Amanda was scooping the rest of the spaghetti into two separate Tupperware tubs, one that was a lot smaller than the other. 

“Why two?” Jiyong asked, kind of thinking that he knew the answer to that. 

“Hyunnie lives in the apartment above mine,” Amanda said casually, looking out the side of her eye at Jiyong, who didn’t notice. “He’s probably getting home about now and he’ll want his food in about an hour, and then he’ll come downstairs looking for me to feed him…” 

“I can take it to him,” Jiyong offered, trying to sound nonchalant. “While Wookie is fixing your light, I can take this up to Seunghyun.” 

“Call him Hyunnie,” Amanda said with a straight face. “He likes that.” 

“Hyunnie?” Jiyong asked, thinking that Amanda was saying ‘honey.’ 

“Ooh, that’d be even better,” Amanda giggled. 

Jiyong looked at her funny, trying to figure out what her angle was. “You want me to call your little brother ‘honey?’” Jiyong asked again. 

“Yeah, he also likes sweetcheeks,” Amanda said, keeping her face serious.

“Are you sure?” Jiyong asked. He wasn’t going to call Seunghyun any of that. 

“It makes him blush. He’ll probably extend your contract just to keep your silence about the entire thing,” Amanda said. “You should pinch his ass when you do it, too. I do it all the time; it lets him know who’s in charge.” 

“He’s my boss,” Jiyong said. 

“Oh yeah. Well, don’t let a little thing like that stop you,” Amanda said, waving her hand up in the air like she was batting away dandelion seeds. 

“You must be plumb out your mind,” Jiyong said.

“You know, Hyunnie says that to me all the time, too! You two are so alike!” Amanda wondered if she weren’t pouring it on a little thick, but then Jiyong snorted. 

“Whatever girl, let me take the spaghetti to him. He must starve by the time your random tangents get around to a point,” Jiyong teased her. 

“Yeah,” Amanda said, her voice darkening, “you two are so alike.” 

Jiyong walked out of the apartment, hands gripped firmly on the Tupperware container. 

“Stupid boys,” Amanda muttered.

“We’re not all stupid,” Dongwook said, leaning up against the doorway. 

“Oh, you’re not stupid,” Amanda said, “My brother is an idiot, though.” 

“I’m going to say that his bank account argues against that particular theory,” Dongwook said, putting Amanda’s pink hammer and wrench back into the case that she pulled them out of. “Your light is fixed.” 

Amanda was irritated that Dongwook said good things about her brother. He always said positive things about her brother, and it bothered her. She didn’t know why, it just did. “My brother is a dumbass,” Amanda insisted, plopping down on her couch. She pulled Netflix up on her TV and chose the girliest movie that she could find, ignoring Dongwook as he sat down on the couch next to her. 

“Pretty Woman?” Dongwook asked. “I never got this movie.” 

“Why not?” Amanda asked.

“I wouldn’t want a hooker to be my girlfriend,” Dongwook shrugged. 

“You think girls should be virgins?” Amanda asked.

“No, I just think that I should have more experience than my girlfriend. Or boyfriend, as the case may be,” Dongwook smiled at Amanda. 

Amanda snorted, “That shouldn’t be hard,” she said. “You’ve got more experience than Julia Roberts’s hooker character.” 

“You might be surprised,” Dongwook said. 

“What, you’re a virgin?” Amanda asked, a little surprised.

Dongwook gave her a disappointed look.

“Okay, so how many people have you had sex with?” she asked.

“Why do you want to know?” Dongwook asked. 

“I’m just curious,” Amanda shrugged. “You don’t have to tell me.” 

“I know I don’t, which is why I want to know why you want to know,” Dongwook made a face at her. 

“Maybe I can learn something for my next boyfriend or girlfriend using your experience,” Amanda said, sitting cross legged and facing Dongwook. “Teach me, kemosabe,” she said in a fake deep Indian voice. 

Dongwook scowled. “Now you got me feeling like a whore.” 

“’Cause you are one,” Amanda said, plopping back into her couch cushions. She reached for the bowl of jelly beans that she left sitting on her coffee table, taking a handful before passing the bowl to Dongwook.

“My feelings are hurt, Amanda,” Dongwook said. He stole the remote control while she wasn’t looking.

“Sure they are,” Amanda replied. 

“No really…” Dongwook said over her sputtering protests as he changed the movie to G.I. Joe instead of Pretty Woman, “I’m a very sensitive man,” he said seconds before Amanda hit him with the couch cushion. 

Jiyong stood in front of Seunghyun’s apartment door, nervously biting his lower lip. He held his hand up to knock three times before he turned around to go back to Amanda’s apartment. He turned around again and went up and knocked on Seunghyun’s door. He wasn’t a coward.

Seunghyun answered the door, looking confused as he stared down at Jiyong.

The boy had never looked so beautiful, teeth marks on his lower lip, a fresh tee-shirt and board shorts, Jesus sandals on his feet. He looked up at Seunghyun with large eyes free from the hair that was pulled into a short pony tail at the tip of his head, two thick hoop earrings hanging from his earlobes.

Jiyong felt the ocean in his ears as Seunghyun stood in the open doorway, his business shirt halfway unbuttoned and all the way untucked, his cuff links out of his shirt sleeves, and his hair slightly rumpled. “Jiyong,” Seunghyun’s deep fuck me voice startled him, “What are you doing here?” 

“I come bearing gifts from Amanda, honey,” Jiyong said. He tried not to blush calling Seunghyun that nickname, but he knew that his face was turning red.

Why was Jiyong calling Seunghyun that dreaded nickname from Amanda? He hated being called Hyunnie, it made him feel like such a little kid. His mom called him Hyunnie when he was upset or when he had a bad day at school, and he hated it then, too. He nodded, trying to figure the whole thing out, and he held the door open so that Jiyong could walk into his apartment. He was intrigued by Jiyong’s red face, but he didn’t want to push to find out what had made him that color. He thought Jiyong might be embarrassed by it, and Seunghyun was sure Amanda had put him up to it. 

The apartment was possibly the most boring looking room Jiyong had ever seen. The couches were white, the walls were white, the coffee table was white, the television was black but it looked like it had never been used, the kitchen was white, the kitchen table was white…

“I’m sensing a theme with your décor,” Jiyong said like a smartass, looking around the room. He hoped he wasn’t leaking sand like always. 

“It’s easy to keep clean, and if I have to replace anything the color doesn’t go out of style,” Seunghyun defended himself. 

Jiyong sighed. “This place sucks, Seunghyun. It’s like a hospital.” 

Seunghyun sighed. “If I let my mom or Amanda decorate it, they’ll hold it over my head until I die,” he found himself confessing. 

Jiyong felt extremely nervous about taking spaghetti into an all-white apartment, but Seunghyun took the Tupperware from his hands and heated himself up a plate, carried it across the white carpet, and sat on the white couch to eat it. 

“You are such a brave man,” Jiyong almost whispered, fighting the urge to follow Seunghyun around with a roll of paper towels and a bowl of Oxy-Clean. 

Seunghyun twirled the noodles on the tines of his fork Italian style, looking up at Jiyong. “How was your shopping trip today?” he asked, slipping the fork into and out of his mouth, eating neatly and efficiently. 

Jiyong tried very hard to not stare at the utensil slipping between Seunghyun’s lips as he answered. “I think we spent about two thousand dollars buying clothing for me.” 

“Two thousand, three hundred forty-seven dollars and fifty-three cents,” Seunghyun agreed. “I got an app that shows me my bank account balance up to the minute,” he told Jiyong. “Does the clothing fit? Does it suit you?” 

Jiyong blinked a few times. “Yeah,” he answered. Was Seunghyun mad about the amount of money that Amanda had said was necessary for his role as Seunghyun’s mistress? 

“Good,” Seunghyun reached for a glass of red wine on his white coffee table. He took a few sips, and then set the glass back down. Jiyong winced the entire time. “Do you have any questions that you need to ask me about your job? Amanda does a very good job of answering people questions, but sometimes people also need to know about business. I am very good at business,” Seunghyun explained. 

“You’ve mentioned that,” Jiyong said, studying Seunghyun. “What else are you good at?” 

“What?” Seunghyun asked.

“You’re good at business. What else are you good at?” Jiyong wanted to know. 

“Math,” Seunghyun answered. 

“No, that has to do with business. What do you do when you’re not taking care of business.” 

Seunghyun blushed. “Nothing,” he answered too quickly. 

Jiyong could sense that this was a very personal question for Seunghyun, and he wanted to push so that he could find out, but he knew that it would be better to wait. “I want to paint your walls,” Jiyong said. “I want to leave everything else white, but let me paint the walls in your apartment,” he said, looking around the room. 

The architecture was great, arched doorways and little built-in bookshelves (that were empty), coffered ceilings in the living room and a deeply recessed ceiling in the kitchen. Jiyong’s imagination was painting the walls as he made the request of Seunghyun. “What?” Seunghyun asked.

“I want to paint your walls. Will you let me?” Jiyong asked again. 

“Yeah, sure,” Seunghyun agreed, taking his empty plate and glass to the sink, and Jiyong winced again as the potentially staining substances were taken carelessly across the white carpet and floor. Seunghyun didn’t spill a drop though, and it was one of the most amazing things Jiyong had ever seen. 

Scratch that, Jiyong thought. Watching Seunghyun roll the sleeves of his shirt back so that he could wash his dishes was one of the most amazing things Jiyong had ever seen. Jiyong found himself swallowing rather loudly at the sight of Seunghyun’s wrists and forearms, but fortunately Seunghyun couldn’t hear it as he had the water running at the time. 

“When can I come over to do it?” Jiyong asked, pushing a little. Part of seducing Seunghyun was going to require being in the man’s presence more than however often Seunghyun was going to need him to be his fake boyfriend. 

Seunghyun opened one of the white cabinet doors and took something off a hook. He threw it at Jiyong, who reached a hand up to catch it. “My security number is 8379*. You have to hit it within a minute and a half of entering; otherwise, the police will be here with guns pointed at your head. Come over any time,” Seunghyun said. “I won’t be here very often, so you shouldn’t feel like you’re in the way.” 

Jiyong stared at the house key in his hand in kind of wonder. “You don’t mind me having this?” 

Seunghyun shrugged, sitting back on his couch. “If it makes you more comfortable around me, it’s good for business.” 

Jiyong wanted to scream. It was another business decision. He made himself calm down, and then decided that no matter what the motivation was for Seunghyun’s action he was going to take advantage of it. He nodded his head and stood up. “I’ll be over tomorrow, then,” he announced. 

“Are you going to take that van? Do you think it will make a four hour drive from the coast?” Seunghyun asked. 

Jiyong stopped, having forgotten about his car. “Oh,” he said, thinking. Maybe Dongwook would let him borrow…

“Here,” Seunghyun said, throwing another ring of keys at Jiyong. “Take the Jag. You and Wookie can drive yourselves back to the beach, and then you can come up here tomorrow. If that’s okay…” Seunghyun asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“It’s great,” Jiyong tried not to gasp. “I’ll be here tomorrow.” 

 

Seunghyun hadn’t been lying when he said that he wasn’t going to be home when Jiyong started working on his walls. That was okay with Jiyong, because it meant that he could snoop around Seunghyun’s house. The first couple of searches produced absolutely nothing. Seunghyun might have been the most boring person alive on the surface for all that Jiyong had found. But then he started noticing things that were a little off in the all-white apartment.

There was a bookshelf with one panel in the back that wasn’t aligned with the other three panels. When Jiyong tried taking a figurine (a crystal mess of an imitation of a bird, very ugly) off of the shelf, it swung down and the back of the shelf swung up. Jiyong found a book and a gun. 

The book had a lock on it and the gun was loaded. Jiyong didn’t touch it too much after that, and he put things back where he found them.

Jiyong found that the coffee table had a secret compartment, too. Again, there was a book with a lock on it and a loaded gun. 

Jiyong didn’t know what kind of gun it was. They had the words Desert Eagle with some numbers on the barrels, but Jiyong didn’t know what that meant. He just knew that Seunghyun had two guns in his house. 

Besides that, the walls of Seunghyun’s apartment slowly grew with Jiyong’s imagination. It took him an entire week to do the living room, but when he was finished the walls were alive with fairy tale creatures. Fairies and goblins snuck around flower gardens alive with insects and small animals, unicorns hid behind trees and dragons flew among clouds. None of the creatures were apparent at first glance, a person had to look at the pictures a while to find them.

Seunghyun was amazed, when he came home late at night to find all of the creatures. He would stare at the walls for hours, falling in love with the painter so fast it hurt his heart. He couldn’t believe that any one person could dream all of this up, much less pull it out of their bodies so well with just a simple paintbrush. He was so impressed with Jiyong that he didn’t know how to express it, so he just avoided him. He would wait in Amanda’s apartment until he saw his white Jaguar pull out of the parking space downstairs, and then he would head upstairs and try to find whatever Jiyong had finished that day. 

All of this time spent getting to know each other without ever actually seeing each other made Jiyong awkward with Seunghyun the next time a job rolled around. 

Jiyong sat next to Seunghyun as he spoke Spanish with a different group of Hispanics. Jiyong knew Seungnyun well enough at this point that he could tell the man was nervous. Jiyong wanted to comfort Seunghyun, but he didn’t know if Seunghyun would be able to figure out how much he really liked him if he did that. 

One of the Hispanics looked at Jiyong and said something, and Seunghyun replied quickly. They all laughed about whatever Seunghyun said, and then they started speaking quickly and intently, Jiyong obviously forgotten. 

Seunghyun didn’t touch Jiyong either, even when the girls came out after business had been taken care of.

These girls were much bolder than the girls at the last place they had gone to. Jiyong was disappointed Amanda wasn’t there to help him keep those girls off Seunghyun. When one of them sat in Seunghyun’s lap though, Jiyong put his foot down. 

He glared at the girl, who scrambled to get out of Seunghyun’s lap, and then Jiyong sat down with a huff where she had been sitting. Seunghyun’s arms wrapped around Jiyong instantly, and he felt Seunghyun’s lips brush lightly against his neck. “Thank you,” Seunghyun whispered into his ear, and Jiyong was grateful he had worn a pair of boxer briefs to hide his instant and painful erection. He tried not to gasp loudly at Seunghyun’s action, but it was hard. 

The men at the table said something, and Seunghyun smiled when he answered them. There was more laughter, but Jiyong noticed that Seunghyun’s arms stayed tight around his waist. Jiyong almost fell asleep from the combination of the sounds of the ocean’s tide and Seunghyun’s hand that kept stroking his hair in comforting counter rhythm. The men across from Seunghyun signed a document that Seunghyun had on his Tablet, and then Jiyong had to get up as they all shook hands and said good-bye to each other.

Seunghyun was even stiffer than usual as they walked back to the helicopter, and he glared at Jiyong as the helicopter took off. “What was that about?” he asked. “I thought that we worked well together, and all of a sudden you were an ice princess. What happened?” 

Jiyong couldn’t tell him that he was falling in love, “I don’t know,” he lied. 

“Well, whatever it was, I can’t work with it. I’ll have to find a new fake boyfriend…” 

“No!” Jiyong said. “I can do it. I want to do it! I want to be your fake boyfriend!” Being his fake boyfriend was better than not having any contact with him at all. 

Seunghyun hoped that he hid the sadness on his face at Jiyong’s quick denial. He didn’t want Jiyong as his fake boyfriend, it was too dangerous and Seunghyun didn’t want to employ him. He wanted to seduce him properly, not have him act like he was jealous. He wanted all those emotions for real, but he guessed that Jiyong acting like his fake boyfriend was the closest he was going to get. How likely was it that someone as masculine as Jiyong was could turn out to actually be gay? And gay for Seunghyun?

Seunghyun bit his lip so that he wouldn’t say anything that could be considered as harassment in this situation. 

“Fine, how’s your Russian?” Seunghyun changed the subject so abruptly that Jiyong wasn’t sure where it was going.

“I heard the language once. On TV. Once I sold a painting to a couple who had Russian accents,” Jiyong said. 

Seunghyun shot him a disgusted look. “We’re going to have to work on your languages. Do you know any languages but English?” 

“I can understand Korean. Sometimes I can even speak it,” Jiyong said. He looked out the helicopter window. 

Seunghyun was confused at the bitterness in Jiyong’s voice. “Where’s your birth certificate?” he asked. 

“What? Why do you need that?” 

“We have to get your passport. I need your birth certificate, and since we’re going to the Russian Federation you need to get your AIDS test, too…” 

“I don’t have AIDS,” Jiyong said, a little angrily.

“That’s nice, but it’s not for me to know, it’s so that Russia will let you inside the country’s borders.” 

“What do you do that you need to go to Russia?” Jiyong demanded. 

“Business,” Seunghyun said, folding his arms over his chest. He got a stubborn glint in his eye. 

“What kind of business?” Jiyong demanded. 

“Do you really want to know that? If I explain to you what I’m doing, you might be in more danger. I know that Amanda has outlined the things that I want from you and expect from you, I would think that would make you more cautious about wanting information.” 

Jiyong’s jaw stuck out as he got stubborn too. “Fine, I don’t want to know anyway. How long are we going to be in Russia?” 

“Three days. I need you to go with me, go shopping, spend lots of money, eat dinner with me and sleep in the same room with me. You won’t be attending any meetings, I just want you there for appearances,” Seunghyun said. 

Jiyong nodded. “What day do we need to go?” he asked. 

Seunghyun sighed, and then pulled a kit out from under his helicopter seat. “Quickly. I’ve already put a rush order on your passport. I just need your birth certificate and I need a sample of your blood.” 

Jiyong watched as Seunghyun put on gloves to take out a syringe and a vial. He didn’t even care as he held out his left arm so that Seunghyun could dab the area with alcohol and slide the needle into one of his veins. He slowly took blood from Jiyong’s arm, and then popped the vial off of the syringe. He put a cotton ball and a Hello Kitty Band-Aid over the syringe hole in Jiyong’s skin after dabbing it again with alcohol.

“Do that often?” Jiyong asked, curious.

“No, it’s my first time. I read a book,” Seunghyun said. “I have 100% comprehension in reading, so it only takes me once to understand something.”

Jiyong wondered how smart Seunghyun was to be able to do that.

Seunghyun placed the vial of blood into a padded envelope, and Jiyong swallowed as he saw Seunghyun stick his tongue out to moisten the flap and seal it. He couldn’t make himself stop staring, and Seunghyun saw where his eyes were and he blushed. 

Was he drooling? Why was Jiyong staring at him like that? Seunghyun touched his face to see if he left any saliva hanging off his chin, but when he couldn’t find any wet spots he was even more confused. 

“Why were you so stiff earlier today?” Seunghyun asked. “I had to tell those guys we had fought, and they didn’t believe me until you acted like you were jealous of that girl in my lap. I was worried that you were going to blow our cover.” 

“I didn’t know how to act now that I basically know you and I haven’t seen you in days,” Jiyong found himself lying smoothly. “It’s ‘cause I felt awkward. I’m sorry. Maybe we should hang out together on a more regular basis so that this doesn’t happen again.” Jiyong would have patted himself on the back if Seunghyun hadn’t been watching. He had transitioned that smoothly into manipulating Seunghyun to spend more time with him. He was the genius in this helicopter. 

Seunghyun tried to hide his panic, how was he supposed to spend more time with Jiyong without giving away all of his secrets, especially the big one of how much he liked the other man? “Do you want me to come to your house then?” Seunghyun asked.

Jiyong scowled, thinking that Seunghyun was trying to see Dongwook. “I should go to your house. I can work anywhere, but you’re always busy.” 

Seunghyun nodded, his face blank as his mind whirled with the possibilities of Jiyong being in his apartment. “I’ll try to be home more often,” he said, kind of struck by how he felt like a husband making promises to his new bride. He liked that feeling, and he wished that it were real.

“We should also probably try to practice touching each other so that it doesn’t feel so awkward, you know?” Jiyong asked.

Seunghyun swallowed. If this man was going to let him touch him, he didn’t know how much self-restraint he was going to be able to practice. It would have to be enough, though. “Okay, like… what do you want to practice?” 

“We should hold hands and things like that,” Jiyong said. Seunghyun forced himself not to back up when the younger man leaned forward. “We should probably figure out how the other man kisses in case we have to slip each other the tongue in public, first of all…” 

“Figure out… you don’t think we’ll just kiss right the first time?” Seunghyun asked, raising an eyebrow. He hoped his cocky arrogance would cover up the fact that he didn’t know how to kiss and had never kissed anyone before.

Jiyong gave him a look that had him feeling stupid. He moved over to the seat next to Seunghyun so that they were close, and they were flying right over Raleigh, close to Seunghyun’s home. “This will only take a few moments, but it’s what we need to do,” Jiyong said. 

Seunghyun swallowed, worried about his breath and his breathing and why in the world was his mouth flooding with saliva and then he felt Jiyong’s soft lips against his own. This was kissing? Why did people make such a big deal out of it? Seunghyun could do this all day and everything would be okay…

Jiyong’s mouth opened, and Seunghyun felt his head spin. His lips pushed and pulled and plucked at Seunghyun’s own, and Seunghyun felt his mouth naturally opening against Jiyong’s. When Jiyong’s tongue touched Seunghyun’s lip, he pulled back, surprised. 

Jiyong slowly opened his eyes to Seunghyun’s shocked face. He laughed, “Have you never kissed a boy before?” he asked.

“No,” Seunghyun admitted. “I don’t think I’ve ever kissed anyone before,” he said, his face turning red.

Jiyong’s eyes got really big. “I was your first kiss?” 

Seunghyun nodded, his face turning bright red. “I haven’t had a lot of time… to… do things like this,” he said.

Jiyong got a determined look on his face. “Let me make it better then. I can give you a better first kiss.” 

“It’s not really a first kiss anymore…” Seunghyun tried to correct Jiyong, but Jiyong’s lips were against his again and he happily shut up. 

Jiyong licked Seunghyun’s lower lip and then touched the tip of his tongue inside of Seunghyun’s mouth. Seunghyun wondered what it would feel like to do the same thing, and he swiped his tongue against Jiyong’s and that almost made him moan at the sensation. It was warm and wet and oh so very nice. Jiyong moved his lips at the same time as he moved his tongue, and Seunghyun imitated the action, loving the pleasurable feelings that came with it. 

They were so busy kissing that they didn’t even notice when Seunghyun’s pilot landed the helicopter and then cleared his throat a few times to get their attention. Seunghyun looked up, still glassy eyed from Jiyong’s kiss, and then remembered who and what he was as he grabbed his briefcase and moved to the waiting car outside of the helicopter. 

Jiyong loved not having to go through airport security when they were moving across the airport tarmac. He would have hated anyone trying to search him when he was sporting the stiff erection that he had. He was going to have to visit a rest stop on his drive home so that he could take care of his problem. 

“Do all kisses feel like that?” Seunghyun asked, genuinely curious. 

“No,” Jiyong told him. “We just kiss extremely well together.” 

“That was amazing,” Seunghyun told him as their chauffer took them off the tarmac. 

Jiyong was shocked that Seunghyun was being that honest about it. “Yeah, amazing.” 

“Does it bother you that we kiss well together?” Seunghyun asked, trying to gauge Jiyong’s reaction. 

“Yes, but right now it has more to do with… I mean, damn Seunghyun, you know what it has… that was a fucking good kiss, right? And guys experience certain… things with a fucking good kiss…” Jiyong studied Seunghyun’s face as the car drove onto the highway. 

Seunghyun nodded his head. He had no idea what Jiyong was talking about, but that was probably because he had an erection. He’d go downstairs and ask Amanda about it after Jiyong left. 

The rest of the car ride was spent in silence, and Seunghyun secretly wished that Jiyong would say something so that things wouldn’t be so awkward between them. When they got there, Jiyong quickly said his good-byes and Seunghyun went up the elevator from the parking lot, and then he skipped going back to his apartment and went directly to Amanda’s. 

“We need to talk,” Seunghyun said, letting himself into his sister’s apartment. She had been sitting on the couch with a romance novel, but she put it aside and tucked her feet up so that she could listen to her little brother.

“What’s the matter, Seunghyun?” she asked, concerned that something had happened. 

“Jiyong kissed me, and then he was moody afterwards. I don’t know why,” Seunghyun said. 

“Jiyong kissed you? Like, kiss kissed you? With a tongue?” Amanda asked, shocked. 

“Yeah, with a tongue. It was fucking amazing. Why was he moody if it was a good kiss?” 

Amanda thought about it quickly. Jiyong liked her brother? But didn’t her brother like Dongwook? “You thought it was a good kiss?” Did gay boys just kiss any boy and it was okay? Amanda knew straight boys were like that, but she had higher hopes for gay boys.

“It was an excellent kiss. I don’t have any others to compare it to, but I enjoyed it very much. Why was he moody afterwards?” 

“I don’t know, Seunghyun. You should have asked him,” Amanda said.

“I couldn’t think,” Seunghyun confessed. “All the blood in my head went south…” 

“I don’t want to know,” Amanda insisted. “Go call Jiyong and find out why he was moody. Or I can do it for you…” 

Seunghyun glared at his sister. There was no telling what she might do if he let her. “I’ll take care of it, don’t you worry,” Seunghyun said. 

Amanda got out a Tupperware container filled with nacho fixings and sent Seunghyun to his apartment after giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. 

Seunghyun sat in his formerly all-white apartment, staring at the walls. He should call Jiyong, he decided. He should find out why he was moody. He stared at the phone for a few minutes before he picked it up and took a deep breath. He hit the button that he had already programmed to be Jiyong’s number and then waited for it to ring. And it rang. And it rang. Jiyong didn’t answer.

Seunghyun sighed as he put the phone down. Maybe he had really pissed Jiyong off?

Seunghyun’s phone rang. 

“Sorry I missed your call,” Jiyong said on the other line. “What’s up?” 

 

Russia wasn’t as cold as everyone said it was, as Jiyong discovered. Even though he couldn’t speak Russian at all, lots of people were willing to help him once he flashed them a smile and said a few words in his slow Southern drawl. He flashed around the credit card Seunghyun had put in his name, and for the first time in his life he had the money to care about what his clothing looked like. 

After his first shopping spree, Seunghyun frowned. “Why didn’t you buy more? You’re supposed to make me look successful and you only spent five hundred dollars? No one will trust my word if I’m cheap with my lover.” 

So Jiyong was at the jewelry store on his second day. Seunghyun made him promise to buy a ring for every finger and to make at least two of them have diamonds. Russia was the country to buy diamonds in, apparently.

Jiyong was dithering over three rings with diamonds in them. He really liked all three of them, but he couldn’t concentrate on making a decision because his mind kept flashing between two memories. 

He had been just pulling into the carport at Dongwook’s house when Seunghyun had called him. He had the phone on silent after his job with Seunghyun, so he checked it just in time to see the last few rings from Seunghyun’s call. 

Jiyong immediately called Seunghyun back, thinking that he wanted to maybe possibly ask him out on a date after their amazing kiss. He was walking on clouds onto the hardwood floors of Dongwook’s house. “Sorry I missed your call. What’s up?” Jiyong had asked. 

“I um… are you busy?” Seunghyun stuttered. 

Jiyong was shocked that Seunghyun stuttered. “No man, I was just about to take a shower and go to bed.”

“I can let you go…” 

“What’s up, Seunghyun? Why’d you call me?” 

“I um… Look, I don’t want you to think that I’m obsessing or anything, because it was no big deal, I’m just confused about why you were moody tonight. I want to make sure that it doesn’t affect our business relationship…” 

“Our business relationship?” Jiyong asked, feeling his heart sink. Was their kiss not as amazing to Seunghyun as he had thought it was? Was Jiyong the only one feeling this way? Seunghyun must really not want him to read too much into what had happened between them if he was calling to make sure that Jiyong was okay. “Dude, I kiss people all the time. It’s no big deal,” Jiyong lied. 

“Oh,” Seunghyun said. Was that disappointment in Seunghyun’s voice that he was hearing? “So why were you moody then? Was it because I’m your boss and I shouldn’t have touched you?” 

“I think that I touched you, boss,” Jiyong said. He might as well be honest about that part of it, at least.

“Oh. It must be because I’m not very good at… touching.” 

“I think that we established that I like the way that you… touch, boss,” Jiyong said, throwing his body down on his hammock and covering his eyes with the inside of his elbow. “I was just moody because I liked it too much, okay?”

Seunghyun was quiet for such a long time that Jiyong was uncomfortable. “I said that I understood what you were talking about, but I lied. I couldn’t think because I liked the way that you… touched, too.” 

The conversation was beginning to not make any sense. Jiyong kind of liked it, though. He tried to decide if he was going to let the conversation go to another place or not. “So we like the way that each other touches?” 

“It seems to be that way,” Seunghyun agreed. 

“What are we going to do about that, then?” Jiyong asked.

“Do?” Seunghyun asked. “Do we have to do something about it?” 

“No, not if you don’t want to,” Jiyong shrugged his shoulders. He let it be quiet for a minute on the other end of the line. 

“I think that we should just… whenever we feel like it… you know… touch,” the word was starting to sound stupid now. Like, it was losing meaning, but saying ‘kiss’ was too hard.

“Okay, just whenever we feel like it, then,” Jiyong agreed. “Sounds fair to me, plus, it’ll help us do our job, right?”

“Yeah, our job,” Seunghyun agreed, and he hoped he didn’t sound as disappointed as he felt. These conversations were only serving to prove that he didn’t mean as much to Jiyong as Jiyong meant to him. Well, he had money, and money would keep Jiyong close. He was pretty sure of that. He was just going to have to spend a lot of it so Jiyong would want more. Everyone wanted money, right? His mom, his dad, Amanda’s mom… he was never sure about Amanda’s dad, but since he had more of it than anyone else he had ever heard of he assumed that he wanted money. Everyone could be bought, and if that was the only way to keep Jiyong…

He kind of wished that Jiyong wanted him just for being Seunghyun, though. He shouldn’t bitch, he told himself. He was given the gift of having Jiyong, even if it was only in the capacity of a business partner. It could always be worse; Jiyong might have been pissed when Seunghyun had said that they should touch. 

“Okay then, I’ll see you at the airport for when we go to Russia?” Jiyong asked. 

“See you then,” Seunghyun said, wishing that it wasn’t a week away. 

Jiyong hung up the phone with Seunghyun, a little ashamed of his cowardice. He had almost admitted to wanting Seunghyun more than just kissing, but he couldn’t take that last step. The next time they were alone together, Jiyong promised himself.

That just happened to be on the plane to Russia. Jiyong was nervous, and he was sweating because he was just finding out that airplanes made him sick. Seunghyun was fussing over him in first class, and then finally someone passed them back some Dramamine. That knocked Jiyong out so hard that he didn’t wake up until they were at an airport in Paris, and then Seunghyun drugged him again and he was asleep until they hit Moscow. 

Jiyong vaguely recalled getting out of the airport and through customs, and then he fell asleep in the car that came to pick them up, and then he fell asleep in the hotel room. 

He was aware that there was only one bed, and he felt Seunghyun crawl in next to him, still fully clothed. Jiyong turned over and then curled into Seunghyun’s side, and he was asleep again before Seunghyun could say anything about it. 

“Can’t decide which one?” Seunghyun’s deep voice came behind Jiyong, startling him out of his reverie as he stared at the three rings. 

“What? Oh, no…” 

“We’d like all three, please,” Seunghyun said, and then he repeated himself in Russian. The salesgirl busied herself with wrapping the rings up and punching the buttons on the register, but she kept sneaking sideways glances at Seunghyun and Jiyong. 

Seunhyun wrapped his large hand around Jiyong’s hipbone, and Jiyong felt it all the way to the tip of his dick. He kissed Jiyong’s temple, “I told you to buy anything you wanted, didn’t I, lover?” 

Jiyong blushed. “I didn’t want to spend too much…” 

“This is nothing,” Seunghyun reminded him. He put his hand under Jiyong’s chin and then lifted his lips up for a quick kiss before he took the white bag from the saleslady and walked out into Moscow with $27,000 worth of jewelry in his hand like it was nothing. 

Jiyong couldn’t believe what he was doing. He slid his fingers between Seunghyun’s own, interlacing them in a kind of fingerporn style that had Seunghyun glancing down at him, one of his eyebrows raised. It was sexy, and Jiyong just gave Seunghyun an impish grin that had Seunghyun clearing his throat and looking away from him. 

From then on, it became a kind of challenge to Jiyong. Walking through the streets of Moscow, Jiyong took every opportunity to slide his thigh against Seunghyun’s, he kept a tight hold on Seunghyun’s hand and dragged it over his nipples as he pointed at something, he breathed on Seunghyun’s shoulder when he looked over to talk to him, he let himself get caught staring at Seunghyun’s lips, he made just enough of a show of bending over a counter filled with MP3 players and IPODs that when he turned to look over his shoulder at Seunghyun casually, he grinned to catch Seunghyun staring at his ass. 

The walk back to the hotel though got more and more awkward, and Jiyong wondered what kind of consequences he was going to have to pay for all the teasing that he had been doing. He was a little scared that Seunghyun would freak out on him for being such a hooker, but at the same time he wondered if Seunghyun hadn’t liked it enough to keep it up when they were behind closed doors. 

Jiyong pulled his hand out of Seunghyun’s because the palm of it had started sweating so badly. It wasn’t something that he intentionally did, but the tension between him and Seunghyun rose indefinitely as they entered the elevator together. 

They kept looking anywhere but at each other, and then their eyes would meet in the mirrored wall of the elevator or when they looked at each other accidently. Jiyong tried to look somewhere that wasn’t Seunghyun, but then he would get a glimpse of his ass in the mirror or he would make eye contact or he would look in the mirror at the same Seunghyun was… Jiyong wondered if the elevator was even going anywhere because it didn’t feel like it was and that was when he realized that they were stuck between the second and third floor on their way to the fifth, and they had been for five minutes. 

“I guess the elevator is stuck,” Jiyong said.

Seunghyun swallowed. “Yeah,” he said. “Been stuck for a while.” 

Jiyong felt a fool. There wasn’t a telephone in the elevator, or any way of contacting the outside world except for their cell phones. Jiyong tried to pull his out, but there was no reception. Seunghyun did the same, and he shrugged. 

“What are we going to do with ourselves until the elevator moves again?” Jiyong asked. 

“Paper, rock, scissors?” Seunghyun asked. 

They sat down next to each other and played a few rounds of that, but Jiyong got bored winning all the time. He looked over at Seunghyun, and Seunghyun looked over at him. They started leaning towards each other, and then the elevator started moving. 

Jiyong wanted to break the damn elevator himself, but when they got out there were two men waiting to get on, and Seunghyun exchanged a few words in Russian with them before they left to walk down the hall to their room. 

They were nervous in the hotel room together, and Seunghyun quickly excused himself to take a shower. Jiyong noticed for the first time when he got out that he had never seen Seunghyun without his shirt on, and even when he had just gotten out of the shower he was wrapped up in his robe that covered him from neck to wrist to ankle without anything showing, and he was also wearing pajama bottoms that dragged on the carpet of the hotel room. 

Seunghyun encouraged Jiyong to take his shower, and by the time he got out Seunghyun had room service. There was spaghetti and duck and goat, and it was all pretty delicious to Jiyong, who knew what hunger tasted like. Sometimes the foster homes had so many kids that no one was ever full. He pushed that thought away, wishing that every time he ate he didn’t have to think about those things. 

“Where do you go?” Seunghyun asked him.

“What?” Jiyong asked, wishing that Seunghyun would talk about something else. He knew this question, and he hated answering because of the looks of pity that people would give him. Maybe he should just lie, or even more pleasantly, maybe he could distract Seunghyun. 

“When you go away like that, where do you go?” Seunghyun repeated his question. 

“Oh,” Jiyong settled for a half truth. “I have a pretty detailed fantasy life,” Jiyong said. “I painted most of it on your wall.” 

“I really like my walls,” Seunghyun said, looking down with a frown at his overcooked carrots. 

Jiyong smiled, helping himself to Seunghyun’s food. “What’s your favorite mythological being?” 

“Brownies,” Seunghyun said without missing a beat. 

“Brownies? Like, house elves?” Jiyong asked, a little surprised.

Seunghyun nodded. “Little homely ugly creatures that make living in a house a home. They make sure your food stays unspoiled and your sheets stay fresh and your floors swept and your windows washed. They take care of you, and all you have to do is feed them a little bowl of milk on the back porch and a crust of bread every once in a while. I used to feed brownies when I was a kid, but my dad got mad because of all the stray cats that would come around…” 

Jiyong was charmed. Most men said they liked dragons or vampires or werewolves or something equally ferocious. Seunghyun’s favorite creature bespoke of his desire for a home. Jiyong wanted a home, too, so it was just all that more attractive. 

“I thought your mother was a good person,” Jiyong said, a little startled that he was so forward. 

Seunghyun looked up at Jiyong in surprise. “Did Amanda tell you that?” he asked. 

“Yes, she said that your mother took her out for ice cream and high heels when she got her period for the first time…” 

Seunghyun frowned at the place where his overcooked carrots had been. “Amanda always remembers the good things. I don’t think she knows how to say something bad about anyone.” 

“Was your mother not a good person then?” Jiyong asked softly.

“She tried. I think that she tried, anyway. There were times… times when I could see regret in her eyes for not doing better by Amanda and me. And she did try to take care of us. It’s just… first, when it was just the two of us, dad was controlling and Korea isn’t exactly fair to women when it comes to family squabbles. Amanda’s dad fell instantly in… I guess you could call it love with my mother, and then there was a fight and mom took the opportunity amongst the chaos to take me and herself to America with Amanda’s dad. I met Amanda, who took an instant liking to me and did nothing to hide her affection, and she taught me English and made her friends hang out with me and…” 

Jiyong waited patiently for Seunghyun to continue, but he never did. He stacked his silverware on his plate and carefully folded up his napkin. “I’m tired,” he said moving over to the bed. 

Jiyong finished cleaning the food off of Seunghyun’s plate, and then he crawled into his side of the bed while Seunghyun turned out the light. There was just enough light from the sun to show how pale Seunghyun’s skin was when he took the robe off in the dark, and Jiyong stared horrified at Seunghyun’s back. 

There were almost thirty raised welts scarring his ivory skin, pale parchment lines that traveled from his neck to his waist, dangerously crossing the pearls of his spine and crossing and overlapping each other in no discernable pattern. Jiyong felt sick to his stomach, remembering how every other kid he had seen with scars like this had screamed in the middle of the night, how they flinched when anyone moved too quickly near them, how they jumped any time anyone had snuck up behind them. The scars on the skin weren’t the worst part, Jiyong knew. The scars that no one else would ever see could destroy someone who had gone through that. 

Jiyong lay in the bed that he shared with Seunghyun, biting his fist to keep himself from making noises as he cried. He didn’t want his Seunghyun to have gone through that, he didn’t want someone as strong as his Seunghyun to have been vulnerable to anyone like that before. He wondered if it had been his dad or Amanda’s dad that had done that to him. It had to be a man, it was always a man.

“Jiyong?” Seunghyun whispered in the dark.

Jiyong couldn’t answer without giving away that he was sobbing. 

“What’s the matter?” Seunghyun asked, turning towards him and pushing his hair out of his eyes so that he could see his face as his eyes had adjusted to the dark. “Why are you crying?” 

“Your back,” Jiyong confessed, unable to hold it inside himself any longer. “Your back, Hyunnie,” he repeated himself, wailing in despair.

“Shhh… that was a long time ago,” Seunghyun said, his instincts making him wrap his arms around Jiyong, pulling his head into his chest. “It doesn’t matter anymore…” 

“Your back,” Jiyong repeated again. “Don’t cry, please, don’t cry, I’m here,” Jiyong chanted.

Seunghyun was confused for a moment, and then he realized that he was crying because Jiyong was crying. “I’ll stop if you stop,” he said, chuckling a little bit. 

“Hyunnie,” Jiyong pleaded with him, but he wrapped his arm around Seunghyun’s body and let his hand feel the raised edges of Seunghyun’s scars. “Hyunnie,” he repeated, sounding so scared. 

Seunghyun just held Jiyong tightly against him, too scared to do anything else. He couldn’t figure out why Jiyong was reacting this way, but maybe he could tell him in the morning, or whenever he felt more comfortable with Seunghyun. Obviously, this was something that affected Jiyong badly, and Seunghyun wondered what was in the man’s past that would make him react this way. He briefly entertained the thought that Jiyong was scarred, too, but he dismissed it when he quickly felt the man’s perfect, unblemished skin after running his hand over Jiyong’s back.

There was a story there, and Seunghyun was going to have to find out what it was. 

 

When they woke up at the same time the next morning, they weren’t awkward with each other surprisingly. They still had kung fu grips around each other, but there was so much comfort in it for both of them that it seemed natural. It was sobering to realize that they might both come from equally fucked up backgrounds that not many other people would understand. 

Seunghyun kissed Jiyong’s lips before slipping out of bed, and Jiyong felt that kiss to his very core. His heart was in so much danger and he almost didn’t care because he wanted this so badly. 

Their plane was going to leave at three o’clock in the afternoon, but Seunghyun had one more meeting to go to. Jiyong stared from the bed as Seunghyun put on a black pin striped business suit and a white button up shirt and a red tie. He put on two huge platinum safety pins in the suit lapel, and Jiyong wondered where he had gotten his fashion sense as he slipped on a pair of black and white oxford shoes. 

Jiyong climbed out of bed to fix Seunghyun’s collar, a move which had his fake lover freezing like a deer in the headlights, as if he made any sudden moves Jiyong would stop what he was doing and that might be the end of him. 

“Go shopping again,” Seunghyun whispered to Jiyong, “See how fast you can spend a couple thousand dollars for me, okay?” 

Jiyong leaned up to kiss Seunghyun, caressing his face with his hand as he planted a chaste kiss on his lips. “Okay, be careful at your meeting, all right?” 

Seunghyun nodded. He let Jiyong pack up the motel room and have their luggage sent to the airport, and then Jiyong went shopping. 

He bought a scarf and a pair of shoes and went to another store and bought an IPOD. He bought a case for his IPOD and some neat earbuds, and then he bought a camera because he wanted to take pictures of Seunghyun. He bought a laptop so that he could keep his songs and his pictures on it. He bought Photoshop to put on his laptop. 

He went to another store and bought Seunghyun some fancy shower gel and some fancy face cream. He picked out a tie and some cufflinks that he thought Seunghyun might like. 

He bought a fancy bag to carry everything around in, and then he caught a taxi to the airport. 

Seunghyun was waiting at the terminal, looking tired. As soon as he saw Jiyong, a smile spread across his face. “What did you get?” Seunghyun asked him, kissing his cheek as soon as he saw him. 

Jiyong started telling him, but then some men in white dress shirts, black belts and shoes, and blue pants and hats came up to them. “Seunghyun Choi and Jiyong Kwon? Could you come with us to the security booth, please?” 

Seunghyun’s eyes narrowed, and Jiyong had never seen that look on his fake lover’s face before. He was a little scared. 

“Is there a problem?” Seunghyun asked.

“Airport security has some questions about some of the activities that have happened since you have been in Russia. Please come with us now, or we will be forced to arrest you.” 

Seunghyun casually reached out to take Jiyong’s hand. “Fine, let’s go,” Seunghyun said. 

Jiyong felt panicked when they separated them quickly into two rooms. One guy was yelling at Jiyong in Russian as a translator calmly repeated everything he said. If Jiyong wasn’t so scared he would have been laughing.

“How long have you known Seunghyun Choi?” the translator asked, after a good bit of yelling by the Russian interrogator. 

“Don’t I get a lawyer?” Jiyong asked out of habit. “I’m an American citizen.” 

The translator asked the interrogator Jiyong’s question. He scowled, and then someone came in with a manila file folder and handed it to the interrogator. 

“Jiyong Kwon?” the translator asked.

Jiyong said nothing.

“You didn’t graduate high school. You were a ward of the state of North Carolina for fourteen years, during which time no one petitioned for custody of you. You haven’t held a full time job, ever. You don’t owe anyone any money… basically, if you were to disappear today, no one would miss you, would they?” 

“My dog might,” Jiyong answered. “If I had a dog. Maybe I should get one?” Jiyong sat forward and looked the yelling man in the eye. He had played games like this when he was in the system, when people assumed that orphans were criminals. “What kind of dog do you think I should get?” 

The screaming man didn’t wait for the translator to translate that. He got into Jiyong’s face, and spittle fell from his lips as he expressed his disapproval of Jiyong’s answer. Jiyong was starting to panic, because it was the first time that any sort of questioning had gone as far as this had. He didn’t like someone so much bigger than he was getting in his face, and it made him more than nervous. 

Seunghyun walked into the interrogation room with members of the police force behind him. The interrogator stood up, pale as ice, as he watched Seunghyun step up into his face. “If you get any closer to my lover, I’m going to start thinking that you want to take something that belongs to me.” 

The translator interpreted, and Jiyong caught a smile on his face. 

Seunghyun gestured to the police. “Y’all might want to take this man out of this room before I physically destroy his face. He needs some protection from me.” 

The translator again translated, and Jiyong could tell he was trying very hard not to laugh as the police came forward and wrapped the man’s wrists in handcuffs. As soon as they had led the interrogator away, Seunghyun fell on his knees in front of Jiyong, searching his face with his eyes. 

“Are you okay, baby? Did he hurt you? Were you scared?” he pulled Jiyong into his arms, kissing his face. Jiyong didn’t know if this was an act for whoever was watching them, but he didn’t care at the moment. He wrapped his arms around Seunghyun’s neck and held on, shaking in the man’s arms, shocked that for the very first time in his life someone had come for him. 

“Seunghyun,” Jiyong tried not to wail as he buried his face in Seunghyun’s neck. It was completely not sexual between them at the moment. Jiyong couldn’t feel anything but relief that Seunghyun had come. 

Seunghyun stood up with Jiyong in his arms. He kissed his forehead, “I’m sorry that you had to put up with that baby, I’m so sorry that you were scared.” 

Seunghyun let Jiyong slide down his body, staring deeply into his eyes as Jiyong’s feet found the ground. He kept a tight hold on Jiyong, and the smaller man felt breathless at his physical proximity. Jiyong almost forgot that they were in an airport interrogation room, he felt light headed and drunk on Seunghyun. His face tilted back and his eyes closed, and he simply breathed in relief and desire. He felt Seunghyun kiss his lips, bury his hand in his hair and hold his face still as Jiyong’s mouth welcomed Seunghyun’s intrusion. He wanted to lick and taste Seunghyun, he wanted to feel him inside of him physically just like he did emotionally. It drove him mad as Seunghyun’s tongue dipped inside of his mouth. 

Someone cleared their throat, and Seunghyun pulled away, looking deeply into Jiyong’s eyes as he responded in Russian. He tore his eyes away from Jiyong’s face, looking over at the speaker, but Jiyong couldn’t look away. This man had come for him. This man had saved him, and no one had ever saved him before. 

Jiyong couldn’t stop staring at Seunghyun the entire time a troupe of security escorted them to their plane. He couldn’t stop staring even though he felt the eyes of all of the other airport patrons staring at them, trying to figure out why they were important. 

Seunghyun made sure that he took his Dramamine, placing the pill on his tongue and holding the water up to his lips so that he could drink. He held Jiyong the entire time that he slept, Jiyong knew because he kept waking up despite the potent drug, holding onto Seunghyun’s waist tightly, panicking any time that Seunghyun moved to adjust his Tablet screen to turn a page on its e-reader or to compensate for the glare while he was watching a movie. Seunghyun would shush him and hold his head to his chest so that Jiyong knew he was there. 

Their arrival in France had them stopping at a hotel for a layover, and Seunghyun put Jiyong to bed. The medication was knocking him out so badly, but he whimpered any time Seunghyun wasn’t near him. 

“Don’t make me fall in love with you, my brave boy,” Jiyong heard Seunghyun whispering. “Don’t make me hurt.” 

Jiyong woke up to the smell of fresh baked bread, stinky cheese, and potent wine sitting on the nightstand next to the bed.

He got up, famished, and he ate while he searched the apartment for Seunghyun. He looked out the window at the cobbled streets, watched people ride by on bicycles and in tiny, stinky cars. It was raining, which was kind of disappointing because it was Paris and Jiyong had always wanted to walk the streets of the city of artists. He contented himself with tearing the crusty bread apart with his fingers into bite sized pieces and settling in an overstuffed chair so that he would watch the rain falling on umbrellas and people rushing through the streets.

Seunghyun came in, finding his man staring out the rain drenched window. “Hey,” he said softly, not wanting to ever lose the perfect image of Jiyong posing near the window with his feet curled underneath him. He would remember this moment forever.

Jiyong looked over at him, a myriad of stories written on his face. “Hey,” he almost whispered, shocked once again at Seunghyun’s beauty. He wasn’t sure he would ever get over it. 

Seunghyun walked into the room, feeling self-conscious now that he was alone with Jiyong now. It felt strange to be in the same room with a conscious Jiyong, alone for the first time after their emotional scene in the Moscow airport. 

“Thank you,” Jiyong said softly. 

Seunghyun looked up at him. 

“Thank you for coming for me,” Jiyong got more specific. 

Seunghyun looked confused. “I don’t know why you think I wouldn’t have come for you.” 

“No one ever has before,” Jiyong said, finding it impossible not to explain to this man how much his action had meant to him. “You came for me.”

Seunghyun’s eyes searched Jiyong’s face, trying to figure out how to respond. He decided to settle for the truth. “I will always come for you,” he said, his heart beating so quickly that he wondered if he was going to have a heart attack, or pass out. 

Again, it wasn’t just sex that was between them, which made the atmosphere so incredibly powerful. Seunghyun took the chair across from Jiyong, and they spent the evening staring at the rain. 

Amanda sat back in her chair after Seunghyun had called her from the Parisian hotel lobby. Did he not know how much she worried every time he left the country? They had such powerful enemies, why did Seunghyun take the chances that he took? What would happen if their enemies finally got the upper hand and had the opportunity to destroy her dear brother? It would be over so quickly. What would she do without Seunghyun?

She took a deep breath. She knew one day that she would have to be brave and stand up on her own, but Seunghyun let her lean on him for so long now that it was second nature to panic any time he was in danger. She loved him, too, more than anything else in the world.

She wondered what Jiyong’s parents’ phone number was, because they should probably be told that their son had been held in Russian custody for a period of thirty minutes, but that he was safe in Paris now. She rethought that, because she remembered that Jiyong had mentioned that he had never left North Carolina before. She figured she should call Dongwook to see what he thought about it and to get Jiyong’s parents’ phone number if he thought that she should call them. 

Who was she kidding? She could admit the reason she really wanted to call Dongwook to herself, even if it was to no one else, couldn’t she?

The phone rang a few times, and Amanda almost lost her nerve and hung up before Dongwook picked up. “Yubesayo,” he greeted her.

Amanda rolled her eyes. “I know that word,” she told him. 

“There’s no fooling the princess,” Dongwook teased her over the phone. 

“Princess?” Amanda asked, and then she made that motion with her hand, batting away dandelion seeds. “Listen, I was just calling you to get your opinion on something.” 

“I have a lot of opinions,” Dongwook said, and Amanda could see him smiling just like he could see her hand motion. 

“Seunghyun and Jiyong were taken into Russian custody…” 

“Are they all right?” Dongwook demanded before Amanda could finish her sentence.

“Yes, but…” 

“Were they hurt? Do they need us to go over and get them?” 

“Dongwook, just listen…” 

“Are you all right? Do I need to come over?” 

“Dongwook!” Amanda shouted into the phone. “They’re all right, they’re safely ensconced in Paris…” 

“Are you okay?” Dongwook repeated himself. 

“I’m fine, it took me a minute to get the Russian police involved when I saw that Seunghyun had pushed his panic button…” 

“Who did it?” 

Amanda sighed, settling deeper into the sofa. She felt safer now that someone who knew the entire story was sharing time with her. “It was daddy’s men. I had to call the American Ambassador in Russia, and then he had to pull in favors with the mob so that the police would get involved… politics in Russia are so bad…” 

“The role you two are playing is dangerous, Amanda. You need to be more careful, or you could get hurt,” Dongwook couldn’t hide the concern in his voice, and for the briefest second Amanda entertained hope. She crushed it strongly under an imaginary rock though, before she answered. She wouldn’t want anything her for herself ever again, she reminded herself. She knew how dangerous desire was. Besides, Dongwook was gay, and he and her brother were in love. 

“Our role is necessary, Dongwook. You know that. Someone has to make up for the decisions that daddy has made. It might as well be Seunghyun and me.” 

“I don’t like you in this position. I’ve told Seunghyun about it, but he said that it was your decision. You’re too young… and it’s too dangerous for a girl that looks like you…” 

“Dongwook, I’m almost flattered,” Amanda said dryly. She mentally made herself stare at the shattered pieces of hope that lay at her feet. They hurt almost too much for her not to hang up immediately so that she could get control of herself. Calling him had been such a bad idea. 

Dongwook was silent on the other end of the phone for a period of time. “So if they’re okay, why did you call me?” he finally asked.

“I wanted to know if you thought if we should call Jiyong’s parents.” 

“I don’t know his parents’ number,” Dongwook confessed.

“You don’t?” Amanda asked. “I thought he moved in with you over a year ago?” 

“He’s not the most open person, Amanda,” Dongwook said. 

Neither was Dongwook, Amanda thought. There was so much about him that she didn’t know, but she wasn’t about to let herself get curious about that. “Well then, I guess it was pointless for me to call you…” 

“You should have called me just so that I knew my roommate was in danger. Or you could have called me to come be with you while you were working on getting my roommate and your brother out of danger. I thought that we were friends, at least,” Dongwook chided her. 

“We’re friends?” Amanda asked, that stupid thing called hope struggling to mend itself at her feet. She glared at it until it stopped wiggling.

“Yes Amanda, we’re friends. At the very least, we’re friends,” Dongwook said. 

“At the very least?” Amanda found herself repeating, and then she smacked herself in the forehead. What the Hell was she thinking? Hope must have mended itself and crawled its way up her back and grasped hold of her heart again. She mentally jerked it out of her heart and threw it on the floor and shot it with her finger guns. “Anyway,” she said quickly, “I’ve got stuff to do. Since you don’t know Jiyong’s parents’ phone number, I’m going to go…” 

“What do you mean, ‘at the very least?’” Dongwook asked, latching onto that question that she hated herself for letting slip out.

“I don’t know,” Amanda said. “It doesn’t matter, I’ve got to go. Sorry about bothering you…” 

“Amanda, wait,” Dongwook said before she hung up on him. 

She was so careful, always. What the hell was she thinking? Flirting with a gay man? Was there anything else more pointless that she had ever done? Why didn’t she just rip her soul out of her body and fling it into traffic? She knew better than that! 

She jumped up off her couch and paced her living room floor for a few minutes. When that didn’t work, she changed her clothes and went downstairs to work out in her condo’s workout room. She ran on the treadmill for twenty minutes, did 67 sit-ups before her stomach protested in agony, then she went back upstairs to her apartment, ordered herself a pizza, ran herself a bath, took off her workout clothing and stuffed the sweaty, smelly mess into a hamper, put on a thin pink cotton robe, and then the doorbell rang. 

She was expecting pizza, so when she opened the door in her robe and found Dongwook she quickly covered herself. “What are you doing here?” she demanded.

 

Dongwook scowled at Amanda. “What do you mean, what am I doing here? And why are you answering your door half naked?” 

Amanda sputtered as Dongwook pushed his way into her apartment. “What are you doing here?” she repeated herself. 

“You hung up on me when we got to a part of our conversation that I was interested in, and you’ve just experienced an emotional shock. I figured since Seunghyun was stuck in Paris, I would come and make sure that you were okay. It’s something that friends do, right?” 

Amanda straightened her shoulders. “Dongwook, I do not need a babysitter,” she told him, crossing her arms over her chest. She saw Dongwook’s gaze flicker down to where the fabric did nothing to hide her nipple, and she gasped. It wasn’t with offense, his dark eyes on her nipple was like a physical caress.

“I don’t want to babysit you, Amanda. I just want to make sure that you’re okay,” Dongwook said, and he slowly looked up her body, lingering over her neck, and then made eye contact with her. He didn’t look like he was sorry at all to have been raping her with his eyes, and Amanda briefly wondered if she was dreaming. 

“I’m a grown woman, Dongwook,” she started protesting.

“Like I don’t know that? It has nothing to do with your genitals and everything to do with the fact that we’re friends. And to answer your question, yes, at the very least we are friends. So I think, as your friend, you should tell me what you meant by your question ‘at the very least?’”

“I was repeating what you said,” Amanda spat back. “You said, ‘at the very least,’ and I was only momentarily curious as to what you could mean by it. I know that you like men…” 

“How many men have you actually seen me with, except for the times that you’ve seen me with your brother?” 

“Dongwook…” 

“That’s it, isn’t it? You know what, Amanda? I’m not gay. I never have been. Your brother was a job to me, nothing more. A well-paying job, but I never once got turned on when I was acting like his boyfriend. Never. I’ve had two ex-girlfriends, and that’s it. What does that tell you?” 

“Dongwook,” Amanda repeated herself, but this time her voice meant something completely different. 

It was all the permission that Dongwook needed. He stepped forward towards her in the entry hall, looking down into her large blue eyes. “Now ask me how many times I’ve been turned on because of you.” 

Amanda’s breathing was shallow. She wondered if she was dreaming, and she wanted to pinch herself. It would totally give her away though, but for the first time she wasn’t as scared of that as she had been in the past. “Dongwook,” she said again, and for the first time she allowed herself to really stare at him. 

He was so beautiful, and his eyes were so intense. He was waiting for her to ask him the question, but she couldn’t make herself do it. “I can’t afford to drag you into my life,” she choked out. “Seunghyun and I can’t have anyone until all of this is taken care of…” 

Dongwook kissed her. At one point he was standing four feet away from her, and then she was wrapped in his arms and his mouth was making love to her own. She felt his lips sliding up against hers and her back pressed up against the wall. She braced herself when he grabbed her thighs to wrap around his waist, hooking her ankles at the small of his back as her hips circled around his sudden and very apparent erection. 

“Wookie,” she moaned, throwing her head back as he kissed under her ear and left a small bruise on the skin of her neck, rubbing her pulsing clit against his blue jeaned erection. “God, please,” she begged. 

He filled his hands with her breasts, rubbing his palms against her nipples. “Oh fuck, this is real,” he whispered into her cleavage, making short work of her robe, letting it puddle at his feet, leaving him with a writhing naked woman on his hands. 

Amanda wasn’t kind to his shirt, tearing the collar, wanting him just as naked as she was. He obliged, hitching her up on his waist before sliding his shirt off and then carrying them back to her bedroom. “Is this real?” she asked him.

He smiled, kissing her chastely before laying her on her bed. “If it’s a dream, I don’t ever want to wake up.” He kissed his way down her body, laving at her nipples, sucking them into diamond points that he worried with his tongue. 

Amanda ran her fingers through his hair, pulling his face back up to her lips. She wanted to feel his kiss again, she wanted to feel his body plastered against her own, and all they could manage was to unzip his pants before he sank into her.

“Fuck you’re wet,” Dongwook gasped, and Amanda slid herself further down his cock, moaning when the base of his erection pressed against her clit. Dongwook’s hips set a rhythm that she could follow, and she followed the dance that he led until she could feel herself squeezing around his thick cock, her back arching and her toes curling. 

Dongwook came inside of her, and then he was cursing. “Fuck, I forgot a condom,” he said, looking at her worried.

She looked guilty, too, “Are you pissed?” she asked, worried that she had ruined everything in her haste to stop denying herself. 

Dongwook looked down at her, realizing that she wasn’t as upset about the possibilities of a pregnancy as she was about him being upset about the pregnancy. He stared at her wide eyes and her full lips, and he imagined a baby girl with this woman, looking up at him with the same blue eyes as her mama. “God, the image of you with my baby at your breast is too fucking tempting, Amanda. Don’t make me want you anymore than I already do.” 

Amanda blushed, “You still…” 

“You think this was a one-time thing? You think that I’ve had enough of you? I still want to taste you, please let me taste you before you kick me out of your bed,” Dongwook begged her. “If this is our only time, I want to be able to live without regretting….” 

Amanda kissed him, her heart beating too wildly at the words that he was saying. “Wookie, you’re going to make it very hard for me to let you out of my bed if you keep talking like that…” 

Dongwook smiled down at her. “Seriously though, I want you again, but I want to be married to you before you start giving birth to my children. We need condoms. Lots of condoms. If you’re pregnant now, I’m okay with that, but I don’t want my mother to rush the wedding because your belly is full of my child…” 

“We’ll have to go get some then,” Amanda said. “But first, I want to go take my bath, and I have a pizza coming…”

“My Amanda,” Dongwook said, “Ever practical.” 

Dongwook’s teasing didn’t stop him from sliding into the tub with her, much to her delight. The pizza delivery guy must have come and left, because when they got out of the tub it still wasn’t there. Dongwook shrugged and told her he was taking her out for dinner. 

Amanda laughed, and then he started dressing her. He put her in a light blue slip dress and green high heels with matching jewelry and a hat that she had bought as a joke. He ended up wearing one of her dark purple tee-shirts as his own had been completely destroyed, and it was tight against his arms and muscled chest. She laughed over that a little, embarrassed and guilty, but he was so delighted with the turn of events that he didn’t care. 

They went out to a little Italian place in Raleigh, and everything seemed new and special and sparkling because they loved each other. 

Seunghyun woke to the feel of something wet licking across his back. He wasn’t sure what it was, and he looked into the mirror next to the bed to find Jiyong sprawled on his stomach, holding a paintbrush and a tube of green paint, biting his tongue as the paintbrush licked along his scarred back. 

“What are you doing?” Seunghyun asked, curiosity stronger than anger that usually happened whenever someone stared at his back. 

“Painting,” Jiyong said, dipping his paintbrush into some white paint that Seunghyun then saw sat on a paper plate on the bed next to him. There was also a dab of yellow, and all of the combinations of colors between green and yellow and white that Jiyong had mixed. 

“On my back?” Seunghyun asked, trying to figure out what the hell was going on. 

“Yeah,” Jiyong said, scowling at something he had just done and then dipping his brush into the edge of the white blot of paint. 

“You know, my back doesn’t make a good canvas…” 

“Sure it does. Quit moving,” Jiyong said. 

“I have to pee,” Seunghyun protested. 

“Hold it. This is a work of art,” Jiyong told him with a smile, and Seunghyun lay in misery while Jiyong swirled the wet brush across his suddenly incredibly sensitive back. 

On top of having to pee, he was also getting an erection. “Jiyong, this is not…” 

“Shhh…” Jiyong shushed him. “I’m almost done…” 

Seunghyun buried his face in his pillow and tried not to think about the fact that Jiyong was in bed with him for the fifth time and he still hadn’t fucked that delectable body, or even done much more to him than kiss him and lust after him. He wondered if Jiyong really liked him that way, or if he just really cared about him as a person. Seunghyun was tempted to just turn over and let Jiyong paint his dick so that he got the idea of what he was doing to him, but the thought of the wet brush bristles swiping against the sensitive skin on his penis was enough to make him want to grind his hips into the sheets. To distract himself, he bitched. “Jiyong, I really gotta pee.” 

“Fine, baby,” Jiyong made a face at him. It was cute and adorable and Seunghyun wanted to lick it off of him. 

Seunghyun got up and rushed to the bathroom, praying that he wouldn’t pee all over the walls with his erection. That would be embarrassing. He held his dick down, and tried to relax, and then he saw his back in the mirror. 

He tried not to gasp in shocked pleasure, but it was pointless. Jiyong had turned his ugly scars into a bamboo forest, bright with growing things and hope and simplicity. He was tempted to go get it tattooed on his back so that no one would ever see the scars that Jiyong had incorporated right into the picture.

Jiyong stood at the bathroom doorway, watching Seunghyun stare into the mirror with something like pleasure on his face. He was standing naked, holding his dick, still not peeing, and Jiyong loved the way the pale greens and yellows and highlights stood complementing his pale skin. He wondered how often Seunghyun stared at his back in the mirror with a frown on his face, hating the way that his skin looked. He wanted to know if Seunghyun liked him a little more for painting on his back. 

Seunghyun caught Jiyong’s eyes in the mirror, and he blushed at being caught staring at himself when he was naked. He figured that Jiyong knew that he was only admiring the artwork on his back, but he slightly wondered if Jiyong wasn’t going to call him a perv for sleeping next to him naked last night.

He couldn’t help himself, though. It had gotten so hot in the hotel, and it didn’t seem like Jiyong was awake enough to notice, and he had meant to wake up and slide his sleeping pants on before Jiyong woke up… but things just happened. 

He concentrated on the matter in his hand, and peed into the toilet successfully. He wondered how he was going to turn around and walk past Jiyong naked with a partial erection, and he saw Jiyong lean up against the doorway with a cocked eyebrow and Seunghyun knew Jiyong was interested to see how Seunghyun was going to handle this situation.

Bravado was not a foreign concept to Seunghyun, and he forced himself to stroll out the door through the doorway that Jiyong was currently filling up halfway. He heard Jiyong giggle, and as soon as his back was turned Seunghyun had to smile because the whole situation was ridiculous. 

“Is this your way of telling me to not sleep naked next to you anymore?” Seunghyun asked with a single raised eyebrow, pulling on a pair of boxers and some jeans. 

“Mmm, I think waking up with a masterpiece on your back should encourage you to sleep naked next to me,” Jiyong said boldly, strolling into the bathroom so that he could brush his teeth. 

Seunghyun’s brain started working on that, and he followed Jiyong into the bathroom. “It didn’t bother you that your boss was naked next to you last night?” 

“Nope,” Jiyong said, swirling a toothbrush around his mouth. 

“It was just hot…” 

“Yes it was,” Jiyong agreed, and Seunghyun wasn’t slow enough that Jiyong wasn’t referring to the temperature. 

Seunghyun blushed. “Jiyong…” 

“Usually when you talk, you screw something up between us, Seunghyun.” Jiyong spit his toothpaste into the sink and rinsed his mouth. “Let’s just enjoy each other’s company without you trying to fix things with words. Let’s pack up the hotel and get to the airport so that we can catch our plane.” 

Seunghyun realized that the acrylic paint that Jiyong had painted him with was drying on his back, so he didn’t bother washing it off when he was brushing his teeth, and Jiyong noticed it was still on when he left the bathroom.

“It’s going to fleck off and then you’ll have a mess inside of your shirt,” Jiyong groused, trying to wipe it off with a wet washcloth. 

“Better than a mess inside of my pants,” Seunghyun mumbled under his breath. He thought Jiyong didn’t hear him because he was across the room, but he did. “I’m going to keep it on. It’s a masterpiece, is it not?” 

“You’re going to be itchy,” Jiyong insisted, and he tackled Seunghyun on the bed so that he could scrub the paint off. 

“No!” Seunghyun insisted, but the washcloth was taking long, hard swipes across his back and it tickled and he was laughing, trying to buck Jiyong off, trying to keep the paint on his back. He threw his head back and laughed, twisting around so that Jiyong had to readjust himself. “I like it there,” Seunghyun insisted. “I like having your mark on me,” he took a chance. 

He hated himself instantly when he saw Jiyong’s face freeze in shock. And then, he didn’t really much care what he had said because Jiyong was kissing him again, slowly and sweetly and it was perfect and Seunghyun wanted it to never stop. 

Seunghyun reached up a trembling hand to carress Jiyong’s cheek, to thread his fingers through his beautiful hair, and he opened his mouth to Jiyong’s marauding tongue. They touched tongues again, just like their first kiss, and Seunghyun felt himself moaning with the simple want of it all. 

Jiyong was kissing his neck, and it turned Seunghyun on so much that his hips started moving on their own, grinding against Jiyong, and he was shocked that he could feel Jiyong’s hard cock against his own. Was Jiyong turned on from kissing Seunghyun’s neck? 

Seunghyun felt a slight pain as Jiyong sucked on his neck, and when Jiyong leaned back to stare at his handy work he grinned in triumph. “There,” Jiyong said, feeling accomplished. “Now you have an even better mark from me.” 

Seunghyun looked over in shock at the little brown spot that Jiyong had left on his neck. He touched it, wondering at how beautiful it looked against his skin. He stared at it for so long that Jiyong started looking uncomfortable, sitting on top of him with his legs straddling Seunghyun’s body and an obvious difficulty coming from the region of his pants zipper. 

“Are you mad at me?” Jiyong asked, suddenly self-conscious and insecure. 

Seunghyun didn’t say anything, staring at the beautiful man on top of him for the longest time. “Not at all… do you think you could put another one here?” Seunghyun asked, blushing as he touched the hard pectoral muscle covering his heart. 

Jiyong looked up at him and then laughed before he playfully obliged, and then pushed Seunghyun back over so that he could finish cleaning the acrylic off of his back. 

They looked at the time, panicked at how late it was, and then hurriedly dressed each other and caught the first taxi to the Parisian airport. 

Seunghyun regretfully gave Jiyong his Dramamine, wishing that he could keep the other man awake with him on the plane so that they could spend their hours together practicing like they had on the helicopter, but then he figured that for what he wanted from Jiyong it would probably be much better to wait until they were alone. 

He loved it when Jiyong snuggled up to him in his sleep again, and he wondered if he could convince him to just move in with him in Raleigh. He wasn’t looking forward to sleeping without the man ever again, if he was being honest with himself. Asking him to stay though, was going to be the most difficult thing that he ever did. If he asked the question, then Jiyong had the opportunity to say no, and that scared the shit out of Seunghyun. 

 

There wasn’t any other long layover after they flew into the airport in New York. They immediately got on their plane for Raleigh, and then Amanda was on time to pick them up from the airport. 

Seunghyun was a little surprised to see Dongwook with Amanda, but he was trying to figure out how to get Jiyong awake and alone so that he could ask him to spend the night. 

It didn’t happen, and Dongwook took the still semi-conscious Jiyong to Seunghyun’s Jaguar so that they could drive home together. Seunghyun bit his lip in frustration and disappointment. 

Seunghyun was used to self-denial, though. He had been sixteen when he went to college and gotten his Bachelor’s Degree in Business Administration. He switched schools to get his Master’s in Business Administration at Amanda’s school, and graduated at 21 with that. He then went straight to law school to get his International Business Law Degree, and he finished that in two years. Now, two years into taking his step-father’s company head to head, he was succeeding in ways that surprised everyone else but him. He had planned his every move carefully so that he could protect his sister first and foremost. Now, he had the money and the power to pull off what he wanted, and then this kid, Jiyong Kwon, came in and made him distracted and moody and horny. 

Seunghyun sipped the glass of Scotch that he had poured himself, tasting the barrel that it had been brewed in. He made a face and then splashed some water into it, enjoying the chemistry behind that action and how it changed the taste. 

Seunghyun sat on his white couch in his fantastic and colorful living room. He opened the secret compartment in the white coffee table, pulling out his locked journal, and then reached under the hidden drawer to pull the key off of the magnet where he kept it. He opened up the book to reveal pages and pages of his crazy handwriting, and he pulled a pen out of his pants pocket so that he could start writing. 

This was one of his secret pleasures: writing fantastic stories that he told no one about. He didn’t trust people to stay off of his computer so he made himself write about the worlds that he saw in his head with his hand on paper with a pen. It was his little secret that he had enjoyed doing since he was nine years old, living in America with no one to talk to but Amanda. Learning English was hard, but he did it with his stubborn determination, and he practiced translating his stories in his head before he ever felt comfortable speaking the language in the classroom. 

It took him two months to become fluent, his reading comprehension skills still serving him in high capacity. Amanda’s father noticed that it was strange, and he proudly sent his new son to schools so that he could take over his business when he wanted to retire, but Seunghyun discovered that he didn’t like his step-father’s methods of doing business. 

Seunghyun became determined to set up his own company and run it his own way, and he had the backing of the United States government. Of course, if he ever got caught, they were going to deny all knowledge of what he was doing, but they liked him so much more than they liked Mr. Seyfried. 

Seunghyun’s phone rang, and he answered it without looking to see who was on the other line. “Seunghyun Choi,” he answered in his low gravelly voice.

“Hyunnie,” Amanda hissed into the phone. “My mama is here. Come save me!” she demanded.

Seunghyun tried not to crack up laughing and roll his eyes because he hated Amanda’s mama, but he couldn’t help himself. “I’ll be there, noona,” he said, hanging up to her hissing and spitting at him on the other end of the line. 

He locked his journal back up, wishing that he could have gotten more than two paragraphs written. He changed his tee-shirt and rinsed with some mouth wash, giving his hair a quick inspection before putting on a pair of Nike tennis shoes. He knew what awaited him downstairs, and he wasn’t looking forward to it. 

He knocked on Amanda’s door seven minutes after she called, and the look of gratefulness on her face made him doubly worried about her. 

“Oh, look who’s here!” Amanda’s very drunk mother called out, letting out a loud and annoying laugh. “It’s Peter’s step-son, the little Chinese boy,” she said rudely, taking herself another sip of her stinky Miller Light.

“Mrs. Skarsgard,” Seunghyun greeted her politely, “how are you today?” 

“Alexander,” Amanda’s mom said, “You remember Seunghyun, Amanda’s step-brother on her daddy’s side.” 

“Yes, I do,” Alexander stood up, smiling down at Seunghyun, almost but not quite hiding the lechery that Seunghyun pretended that he never noticed. “It’s been a long time, Seunghyun.” 

Amanda’s step-brother on her mama’s side was amazingly tall, amazingly good-looking, and an amazing model. Seunghyun was never impressed with him, and that made Alexander amazingly obsessed with his step-sister’s step-brother. 

“I told Alexander that we were going to stop by your house on our shopping trip to New York, and he insisted that he come along, Amanda. I don’t know why you don’t move in with me, now that you’re out of school. I could set you up with so many nice boys in Sweden…” 

“I’m sure you could, mama,” Amanda said, handing her mother a coaster to put the sweating bottle of Miller Light onto so that it wouldn’t stain her oak table. “I’ve got a boyfriend though.” 

“You do?” Amanda’s mother asked, surprised. “Does she have a boyfriend, Seunghyun?” Amanda’s mother glared at him as if he were the offending party. 

“Of course,” Seunghyun said. He had no idea that Amanda had a boyfriend, but whoever she named he wasn’t going to act like he didn’t know about it in front of her mother, even if she named him. He would play along for Amanda. They were allies against their parents, they had already sworn this to each other. 

“Who is he, Amanda? What does he do?” Amanda’s mother slurred. 

“He used to work as Seunghyun’s personal assistant, but now he’s a carpenter, and his name is Dongwook Choi,” Amanda answered. 

Seunghyun tried not to jump at Dongwook’s name. He was pretty sure that he could pay Dongwook to play the part for Amanda, but he wondered how Dongwook was going to feel about it. He had quit because he didn’t want her to find out about his feelings for her. 

“Choi?” Amanda’s mother asked. “Is he your cousin?” she glared at Seunghyun, “from China? What kind of a name is Dongwook? Can’t he take an American name?” 

Seunghyun wanted to kill the old woman for being a racist bat, but that would get in the way of his plans for taking over her ex-husband’s business.

“I bet he’s hot if he’s Seunghyun’s cousin,” Alexander grinned, his blue eyes sparkling. 

“He is hot, but he’s not Seunghyun’s cousin,” Amanda said, folding her arms in front of her chest and sticking her chin out in what Seunghyun recognized as her stubborn pose.

“Get him here. I want to see him now,” Mrs. Skarsgard demanded. “If you’re seeing someone, I want to meet him.” 

Amanda pulled her phone out and called Dongwook, telling him that her mother was at her apartment and she would appreciate it if he would turn the car around so that he could meet her. 

Seunghyun wanted to put a stop to the charade that Amanda was pulling right now, he didn’t want Dongwook hurt. He knew Amanda didn’t think anything of it because she didn’t know that Dongwook really liked her. But he would do it afterwards. Dongwook might be his friend, but Amanda was his sister and she needed this right now. 

“So Seunghyun,” Alexander said, stretching his long, long model legs out in front of him, “How’s business?” 

“Good, I just finished signing a deal that put $253 million into my bank account,” Seunghyun said casually. He normally didn’t talk about business in front of other people, but he wanted Amanda’s mother to know that she couldn’t push around his sister just because she wanted to. “With the Russian government,” Seunghyun continued. 

“Do they know that you’re gay?” Mrs. Skarsgard asked him, scornfully. She wanted to tear him down in any manner available to her. 

Seunghyun didn’t know how she had found out, but he didn’t blink. “I’m pretty sure that they know that.” 

Mrs. Skarsgard blinked at him, shocked that he agreed to what she had intended as an insult in such a calm manner. 

Alexander grinned at that statement, and Seunghyun wouldn’t let himself wince even though he knew he was going to have to put up with more shit from Amanda’s step-brother because of it. “I knew you were gay,” he said with a very pleased expression on his face. 

“I have a type, too,” Seunghyun clearly stated, raising a single eyebrow to stare down and his step-sister’s step-brother. 

“All men like an exotic difference once in a while,” Alexander said, innuendo dripping off his tongue. 

Seunghyun tried not to roll his eyes as Amanda’s clearly retarded mother ignored the exchange. She was blind to Alexander doing anything that wasn’t perfect. He had the woman wrapped around his finger. 

Seunghyun supposed that the man could be charming once in a while. If he wasn’t always trying to stick his dick up Seunghyun’s ass, that was. 

“I don’t know if I would take bets on that theory, ‘Lex,” Amanda said, “Seunghyun’s boyfriend is pretty damn scrumptious, if I do say so myself.” 

Alexander scowled at her nickname for him, but Seunghyun smiled at his step-sister’s ability to discern a person’s most –hated pet name and then torture them with it. Amanda got up to serve them all snacks and late night drinks, and they chatted with each other for a time while they waited for Dongwook and Jiyong to get there.

Amanda’s apartment door opened, and Dongwook and a still-groggy-from-his-last-dose-of-Dramamine Jiyong walked into the room.

Amanda stood up in triumph and walked over to Dongwook. Seunghyun was even impressed at how realistic their quick kiss looked, but he was more distracted by Jiyong crossing the room to curl up in Seunghyun’s lap like a kitten. No one in the room missed the look of utter delight on Seunghyun’s face as he wrapped his arms around Jiyong, who sleepily rested his head on Seunghyun’s shoulder.

Dongwook held his hand out to Amanda’s mother, lightly squeezing her fingertips in greeting. 

“Mrs. Skarsgard,” Dongwook greeted her. “I’m Dongwook Choi…” 

Mrs. Skarsgard pretended that she wasn’t affected by Dongwook’s charisma and beauty, but Seunghyun had seen tougher individuals than her fall in a matter of minutes when Dongwook turned his charm on.

The only thing that really surprised Seunghyun about those first five minutes was the look of hatred and jealousy that Alexander gave Jiyong, and then the look of utter betrayal that he gave both Seunghyun and Amanda. Seunghyun knew Alexander had always acted like he had a crush on him, but he always thought that most of that had to do with making Seunghyun uncomfortable and pissing off Mrs. Skarsgard. He had never entertained the notion that Alexander’s emotions might have been real, and Seunghyun felt bad for being such an ass to the other man. 

Alexander caught the look of pity on Seunghyun’s face, and pride so quickly covered every other emotion that Seunghyun wondered only briefly if he had read the other emotions correctly. Of course, he was used to reading people’s expressions for business, so he thought he was pretty spot on.

Amanda ordered Chinese delivery because, she announced, her regular pizza guy was pissed at her. Dongwook laughed at this announcement, and Seunghyun started to wonder what had happened between his friend and his sister while he was in Russia. 

Seunghyun saw that Dongwook had things under control, and he was tired from his plane trip and Jiyong’s eyes had such bad bags underneath them that they looked bruised. “I’m going to take Jiyong to bed with me. If you’re not staying, Wookie, I’ll take him home tomorrow.” 

Dongwook nodded, “I might spend the night with Amanda,” he said, and Seunghyun just nodded his head to hide his shock. Something must have happened between the two of them, and he would find out what that was in the morning. 

He carried Jiyong out of the apartment princess style, Alexander’s blue eyes boring holes in Seunghyun’s back. Seunghyun took the elevator up to his apartment, not really wanting to let Jiyong out of his arms at all. 

He wished the man were awake because there were things he wanted to do to him, patterns he wanted to trace on his body with his tongue, areas he wanted to explore with his fingers. Seunghyun had never had urges this strong before, and he wondered if it wasn’t because he loved Jiyong. 

He did love the man, Seunghyun admitted to himself. It was a frightening thing, because he truly could not afford to be distracted in his work, which is why he hired a boyfriend instead of getting a real one. Jiyong was in so much danger, and Seunghyun hated that he was so innocent because it meant that he could be destroyed. Jiyong’s soul was so clear and so pure that it hurt to look at him sometimes. 

Seunghyun laid the sleeping man on his bed, and then he lay down next to him so that he could stare at him. His beach boy was so beautiful, curled on Seunghyun’s bed, wearing the rings and clothing that Seunghyun had bought for him. If this was the only way that Jiyong would let him be on him, Seunghyun would buy him a mall filled with clothing. 

Seunghyun still wasn’t sure how much of their relationship was real and how much was acting. He thought about their kiss in their Paris hotel room yesterday and he was almost certain that had been real. He touched the marks that Jiyong had left on his body, and the memory of Jiyong’s lips and tongue was enough to make him hard all over again.

Seunghyun left the sleeping man on top of his covers while he went to his bathroom to take a quick shower and change into his sleeping clothes. He wished he had enough guts to sleep next to Jiyong naked again, but his apartment had perfect atmospheric control, and he didn’t have the excuse of it being too hot to get naked again. 

He slipped himself and Jiyong under the covers, holding Jiyong in his arms. He slept so well like this he was tempted to add it to Jiyong’s contract, so that he would be required to do this every night, but first he watched as Jiyong murmured a little in his sleep, nonsense words that made Seunghyun’s heart turn over. 

What had made his lover? What had happened to him that he had been so surprised that Seunghyun had come for him? 

Seunghyun thought that Jiyong should know how he felt. He should probably man up and tell him what was going on inside of him. This was the last thought he had before he fell asleep.

He woke up to Jiyong staring at him, smiling at him. Seunghyun felt his heart turn over as that beautiful man looked at him. “I love you,” Seunghyun said first thing. He pulled Jiyong tightly into his chest. 

“What?” Jiyong asked. 

“I love you,” Seunghyun repeated himself. “I’m sorry, because I promised this was just business, but it isn’t anymore. I love you.” 

Jiyong pushed himself away from Seunghyun’s chest so that he could look into his eyes, searching them for the angle that he didn’t want to find. “Are you serious?” 

Seunghyun blushed, but he nodded his head. “I…” 

And then he couldn’t say anything else because Jiyong was kissing him. It felt so right and so good and Seunghyun kissed him back, sliding his hands down Jiyong’s fucking perfect body, tangling their tongues and threading their fingers through each other’s hair, and then Jiyong slid his hands down to cup Seunghyun’s ass. 

It was a new sensation, one that Seunghyun had never felt before, a welcomed man’s hands on his ass. His hips jerked into Jiyong’s erection, and he was moaning at all of the sensations that he had never felt before. All he knew was that he wanted everything that Jiyong was doing to him and everything that he wanted from him. 

His phone rang, and Seunghyun pulled away from Jiyong. “Sorry, babe,” he apologized as he reached over to pick his phone up. 

“You and Jiyong should probably head on down now,” Amanda said, her voice low and urgent. “Dad heard that mom and Alexander were here, and then mom told him about you and Jiyong and me and Dongwook, and now mom and dad and your mom and Alexander are all in my apartment, and Dongwook can’t even make them stop arguing with each other… “ 

“Shit,” Seunghyun said, rolling out of bed. “I’ll be right there.” 

Amanda hung up the phone, and Seunghyun looked at Jiyong with regret in his eyes. “We have to go downstairs. My mom and step-dad are about to start World War Three in Amanda’s apartment.” 

Jiyong nodded, and they quickly cleaned up. Seunghyun disappeared from Jiyong’s sight for only a second, and then he came back into his room and stole one more kiss from Jiyong before they went downstairs, and Amanda quickly let them into the apartment.

It was loud and chaotic, and Jiyong couldn’t believe that Amanda’s mom and dad were yelling as loudly as they were.

He was instantly attracted to the small Asian woman on the couch. She wore a red business like dress with a red hat on her very black hair, and her lips were painted the same red as her shoes. She wore white handgloves and sat primly on one of Amanda’s chairs. She looked so much like Seunghyun that Jiyong was shocked. 

It took him a long moment to realize that everyone in the room was staring at Jiyong and Mrs. Seyfried, just staring at each other.

“Who are your parents?” Mrs. Seyfried demanded of Jiyong as recognition hit her face, her Korean accent strong. “Who are your parents?” she demanded again, panic filling her voice. 

 

“My parents?” Jiyong asked. “Why do I remember you?” 

“What is your name?” Mrs. Seyfried demanded, her eyes squinting, trying to make sure that she recognized the man standing in front of her. He looked so much like his father and mother she knew whose son he was without even needing to ask. 

“Jiyong Kwon,” he answered. “Why do I know you?” 

Mae Seyfriend looked at her son, at the look of absolute love and terror on his face at her actions, and her heart broke for him. She had tried to keep him out of the Korean Mess, as she liked to call it. She had moved him to a different country, put him under the protection of the strongest man she could find, and here it was again, staring her in the face. “No,” she whispered. 

“Mom,” Seunghyun said, his hand wrapping around Jiyong’s protectively. Mae’s heart broke to see that gesture, her beloved son holding that man’s hand. Would fate always deal these two families a hand that was impossible to play? “What’s the matter?” 

“Love any man in the world, Seunghyun,” Mae said, “I don’t care about that. I will welcome another son. You cannot love a Kwon. Love this man over here,” she gestured to Alexander, “but you cannot love that one.” 

“Mom, Jiyong is a good man,” Seunghyun started to say, a little weirded out because his mother was always so very much against Alexander even visiting them.

“I think your mom has a good point,” Alexander broke in. His blue eyes said that he thought this entire thing was a joke.

“Mae, I think they really love each other,” Amanda said, trying to stick up for her brother, even though Mae was acting a little crazy.

Mr. Seyfried’s face was pale. “Jiyong Kwon? Son of Kwon Sangwoo?” 

“How do you know my dad’s name?” Jiyong asked, his face almost frightened. Something in his memory was trying to force its way back into the forefront of Jiyong’s mind, and he didn’t know what it was, but that woman, Seunghyun’s mother, was connected with it in some way.

“Get out of my daughter’s home,” Mr. Seyfried said, his rather plain face transforming into something else, something frightening and protective. “Seunghyun, you cannot continue to see this man who wants death for me and this family.” 

“Michael, I’m already a traitor to you and this family, remember?” Seunghyun asked, pulling Jiyong tighter into his arms like he could protect him from his mom and his step-dad. 

“He’s going to want to kill you once he finds out who we are, Seunghyun,” Mae told her son. “You are holding the instrument of your own destruction.” 

“Just, step away from him, son,” Mr. Seyfried said, and he pulled a gun out of his pants pocket. “Step away. I’ll pay the police off…” 

Seunghyun slid his own gun out of the back of his pants, flicking the safety off with his thumb and he leveled his own gun at his step-father, shoving Jiyong behind him. The two men were pointing guns at each other and the women in the house were screaming at them to put their guns down, and Dongwook was shoving Amanda behind him while Alexander stepped up and pulled both guns out of Seunghyun’s and his step-mom’s ex-husband’s hands. 

“I think that we all need to say a few more words before bullets start flying,” Alexander said calmly. He quickly pulled the clips out of the guns, and Seunghyun remembered that Sweden had mandatory military service until last year, and that Alexander had completed his duty in the Marine Corps. Of course, Alexander didn’t know that Seunghyun was still armed, but he was going to wait until his step-dad pulled his second gun before Seunghyun did the same.

“How long were you planning on killing my son?” Mr. Seyfried demanded. 

“Jiyong doesn’t want to kill me,” Seunghyun said, wondering why his step-dad was saying such crazy things.“He’s my boyfriend!” 

“Answer me, Jiyong Kwon,” Mr. Seyfried almost spit out Jiyong’s last name. “How long?” 

“I don’t want to kill Seunghyun,” Jiyong said, his face so frightened that Seunghyun’s heart was breaking. Why was his step-dad scaring his boyfriend? 

“How could you not want to kill the son of the man that killed your father?” Mr. Seyfried scoffed.

Seunghyun froze. Jiyong froze. Amanda made a squeaking sound, and Dongwook took a step towards Jiyong.

“What?” Seunghyun asked, his face pale. 

“When we left Korea, it was because your father had just shot Kwon Sangwoo,” Mae told Seunghyun. 

“Why did he shoot Jiyong’s father?” Seunghyun asked. 

“It was a territorial dispute…” 

“I would have remembered that,” Jiyong insisted. “I don’t remember Korea, but I know that I lived here, in the States, since I was at least three…” 

“No, you were in Korea until you were seven,” Mae said. “You lived with your grandparents until you were seven…”

Jiyong thought they were just foster parents. They spoke English. He lived with them for three years… “Seunghyun?” Jiyong asked, reaching out to the only man who had ever come back for him. 

“Where have you been since then?” Mae asked him. “My husband has been looking for you…”

“Seunghyun?” Jiyong repeated, hoping that he wasn’t about to cry in front of these people.

“I know you are only here to destroy Seunghyun…” Mr. Seyfried started to say. 

“No, he loves me,” Seunghyun stated, his low voice sure and firm.

“Has he told you that?” Alexander asked in a soft voice, already knowing the answer, seeing it written in the horror on Jiyong’s face. 

“You love me, don’t you Jiyong?” Seunghyun turned around, so panicked at the thought that Jiyong didn’t love him that he turned his back to his family, knowing that Mr. Seyfried waiting for the opportunity to stab him in the back wasn’t a metaphor, but needing to look at his fake lover. “You love me, right?” 

Jiyong looked up at the man whose father shot his father, leaving him an orphan, alone all those years. He stayed silent. How was he supposed to answer that, even if that question came from the lips of the most beautiful man he had ever seen? How was he supposed to forget the total misery that his life had been, the constant shuffling, never having a home, never belonging to anyone or to anywhere, not knowing until now that his father had been shot, and by this man’s father?

“Tell them,” Seunghyun demanded, desperation taking root in his heart, tears falling from his beautiful eyes. “Tell them that you love me. Tell them, please,” Seunghyun pled. 

“Dongwook,” Jiyong said, his voice firmer now that he knew he needed out of there. Jiyong had forgotten the number one rule he had learned in the system. Take care of yourself, because no one else would ever do it for you. “Take me home.” 

“No,” Seunghyun said, falling to his knees. “Don’t do this, don’t tell me everything has been a lie…” 

“I never told you any lies, Seunghyun,” Jiyong said, icicles dripping from his lips. “I thank God I never told you that I loved you.” 

Seunghyun was bent over his lap, sobbing. The sound was heartbreaking, unreal, and Amanda ran over to wrap her arms around her little brother.

Jiyong made eye contact with Alexander, who smirked at the much shorter man. Jiyong didn’t know what to make of that, but he desperately wanted to punch Alexander’s expression right off of his face.

Dongwook got Jiyong out of that apartment as quickly as he could, scared for both of their safeties at this point. 

Jiyong was silent the entire four hour ride back to Atlantic Beach from Raleigh.

It took Jiyong two days to decide to make the drive back to Raleigh. Two days to make a four hour road trip. Two days of remembering a broken Seunghyun on the floor crying his eyes out, making broken sounds. 

Jiyong was going to apologize, first and foremost. The man had saved him in so many ways, and Jiyong had left him just because things got a little complicated. 

Dongwook sprawled out along the backseat of Seunghyun’s white Jaguar, exhausted from working. His father had a small construction company, and Dongwook had spent the entire time Jiyong took deciding on his next move picking out a house for him and Amanda, making changes that he thought Amanda would like to the bathrooms and closets. 

Jiyong wished he had been that constant with Seunghyun. His man deserved that, deserved to have Jiyong’s loyalty and love for all time.

Jiyong was going to sit down with Seunghyun, and they were going to talk. Jiyong was going to tell him about the foster homes and starving and running away. He was going to straight up ask about Seunghyun’s job and his scars and the journals.

Most importantly, Jiyong was going to confess that he loved Seunghyun. He loved him, and he would love him for all time, and he would love only him. Jiyong felt safe with Seunghyun. He felt safe and loved and cherished. 

They pulled up in front of Seunghyun’s and Amanda’s apartment building. Dongwook woke up in an almost feline way, yawning and stretching his body while arching his back. 

Jiyong was nervous as he waved goodbye to Dongwook at Amanda’s floor. What if Seunghyun was too mad at him to talk? How was he going to handle his justifiable anger?

Jiyong made himself march down the hall.. He inserted the key that Seunghyun had given him into the door’s lock, breathing a sigh of relief when the door opened. He quickly entered the security code into the alarm system, a little confused when he realized it hadn’t been armed in the first place. 

He shrugged and slipped his shoes off, moving to walk into his living room, but he froze in horror.

The world felt like he was in the middle of a snow globe or an alternate universe. Seunghyun’s living room was completely empty. The white furniture was gone. The white coffee table, the kitchen table, the chairs, the ugly crystal bird sculpture thing, all of it was gone. 

Jiyong’s walls were painted beige. 

Jiyong ran into the bedroom, the master-bath, the walk-in closet, the guest bedroom, the office. Every room was completely empty.

When Jiyong went back to the living room, horror written on his face, Dongwook stared at him with tears streaming down his face. 

“He’s gone, too?” Dongwook asked.

Jiyong felt his heart break as he realized that Amanda was gone, too.

Dongwook was dialing Amanda’s phone number again, getting an out of service message. He took Jiyong’s phone out of his hand and dialed Seunghyun’s number.

They both jumped when they heard the phone ring, and Jiyong scrambled to get the phone from behind the hidden shelf. 

Jiyong was listed as “My soul,” and the phone contained pictures of him and that was it. It was set on silent if anyone else called except for him.

Jiyong realized it was his good-bye letter. He held the phone to his chest and let the tears fall. 

He had lost Seunghyun. His one mistake had cost him not only the love of his life, but Dongwook’s, too. There was not enough guilt to cover how badly Jiyong felt about what had happened, and no amount of apologizing could make anything better. So Jiyong dragged Dongwook back to his car without saying a word, and started the four hour drive back to the beach.

The club had a pulsing, sickening rhythm, and Seunghyun was too drunk to care. He wanted to get out of there, but Alexander had promised that it was for his own good. Alexander said everytime they left him alone they caught him doing something crazy, and Alexander wanted to go out in New York City and Seunghyun was just going to have to go everywhere with him until he stopped trying to kill himself.

Seunghyun didn’t think that he was trying to kill himself, as he took another shot of tequila. They were just moving into a new place and it wasn’t his fault that one of Amanda’s crystal vases had broken right before he tripped and fell, scarring his left forearm up to all hell. And that wire had already been stuck on the ceiling, Seunghyun couldn’t help that he was carrying a heavy box of books and he didn’t see the wire until it had been wrapped around his throat. He really wasn’t trying to kill himself, but no one would listen. 

He turned to tell Jiyong about it, but then he remembered that Jiyong wasn’t there, that Jiyong would never be there, and he felt his heart shatter and break again. 

Alexander sat down next to him in all his blond glory, sweating after dancing with a lot of his model friends. He took the shot of tequila out of Seunghyun’s hands and downed it himself, wincing at the taste. “How many times did you two fuck?” Alexander asked him, “you’re acting like this is the only time you’ve ever been betrayed.” 

“We never…” Seunghyun didn’t want to talk about this with Alexander.

“He never took it?” Alexander smirked. “He never loved you if you two didn’t fuck, Seunghyun. Did you have opportunities?” 

“Yeah, but…” 

“See,” Alexander said, moving in to kiss Seunghyun’s cheek, “He didn’t love you. A man who didn’t love you is not worth all this torment. Forget about him. If you don’t like the club, I’ll take you somewhere else…” 

Seunghyun took another shot of tequila. How many was that now? Tequila wasn’t good for a man, it made him drop to the floor, and this kind had the worm in the bottle. Seunghyun heard some people ate the worm, and that thought was so sexual in his mind that he turned to tell Jiyong about it, and then he remembered that Jiyong wasn’t there anymore. 

“Stop looking for him,” Alexander demanded, holding Seunghyun’s face to his own. “He never wanted you, and I…” 

Seunghyun looked drunkenly into Alexander’s eyes, fascinated by the blue color that Jiyong had used to paint the sky on Seunghyun’s living room wall. There was a patch right behind the cloudy dragon’s head that was exactly this color blue, and Seunghyun wanted to tell Jiyong about it. 

“Fuck it,” Alexander said, kissing Seunghyun’s lips quickly. He pulled back, flashing his baby blues as he searched Seunghyun’s face for any kind of response. 

Seunghyun wanted to tell Jiyong about Alexander kissing him, how sparks didn’t fly and how he wasn’t interested at all, but Jiyong wasn’t there.

Alexander kissed him again, longer this time, sweetly and tenderly. Seunghyun obediently opened his mouth when Alexander pushed on his jaw, and he tasted tequila and a little bit of lime on Alexander’s tongue. It wasn’t like kissing Jiyong, and Seunghyun didn’t know what to think about it because Jiyong didn’t love him. 

Alexander pulled back when he felt Seunghyun’s tears, pulled back and kissed those tears away. “C’mon, we’re going somewhere else,” he said gruffly, and then he said some words in Swedish to one of his model friends, who nodded and moved aside so that he could take Seunghyun out of the hot, smelly club. 

Alexander grabbed them a taxi, and then leaned over so that he could make out with Seunghyun in the back seat. Seunghyun didn’t protest, so Alexander took it as he had permission to run his hands up Seunghyun’s body, to feel his chest and his arms, to cup his face in his hands as he kissed him again. He pulled Seunghyun across his lap, held the man straddled across his thighs, and then he was surprised when Seunghyun started kissing him back, his eyes closed.

It was good, Alexander thought to himself, it felt so good to have Seunghyun kissing him. He pulled on the silk that was Seunghyun’s hair, burying his large fingers in it, and Seunghyun was alive in his arms for the first time, kissing him back, keeping his eyes tightly closed. 

Seunghyun ran his fingers across Alexander’s jaw, following the trail he blazed with his lips, whispering into Alexander’s ear, “Ji,” before licking around the shell of his ear.

Alexander sighed. If this was the only way that he could have Seunghyun, he would take it. He let Seunghyun keep his eyes closed and he held onto Seunghyun’s hip as he ground his erection up into Seunghyun’s, enjoying the feeling of the man gasping at the sensation. 

The taxi driver took the horny men to a hotel, impressed with the cab fare that he got from the blond one. He shook his head as he dropped the two of them off. He hated fags. 

Alexander finally was alone with Seunghyun in a hotel room. He made short work of his own clothing, and he stripped Seunghyun down with frightening efficiency. He knew that the only way to make Seunghyun love him was to show him physically how much he cared about him. 

Seunghyun watched the huge blond man with bleary eyes. What had he been drinking? Why wasn’t Jiyong here to tell him what was happening? 

Alexander only gasped slightly when he turned Seunghyun over on the bed, shocked at the mess that was his back. What the hell had happened to him? Alexander felt so angry at whoever had done this to Seunghyun’s beautiful skin that he briefly saw red, but he had another task at hand. He had what he needed in his pants pocket, and he put the condom on quickly. He kissed Seunghyun’s neck as he prepared him for his entry, tongued Seunghyun’s tears away and held him tenderly as he slowly pushed inside Seunghyun. 

Seunghyun couldn’t stop crying, but he didn’t tell Alexander no. It didn’t matter anyway, because Jiyong didn’t love him. Jiyong would never love him, and if Jiyong couldn’t love him it meant that no one could possibly love him. Alexander had wanted him for years, ever since they had met when Seunghyun was sixteen years old and Alexander had been twenty-seven. Why not give in to this man? He wasn’t ugly. Seunghyun would never love him like he loved Jiyong, but at least he would have a fake boyfriend to take care of business with. 

 

The apartment wasn’t as tiny as the last one, and the floors at least had heaters beneath the smooth boards. Seunghyun even had his own room this time, he thought with a pleased expression on his eight year old face. It felt good to rest his tummy on the boards in the back corner of his room, on top of a pretty blanket that his mommy had given him for his birthday.

His dad was out there with his clients again, selling guns. That’s all his dad ever did, was get guns that were smuggled into Korea and sell them to men with tattoos. Seunghyun kind of thought that the scars on his back looked a little like tattoos, and he liked to pretend that he was in a gang like his daddy. 

No one knew guns like Choi Hanjin, people came from miles around to see how his great father could fix their guns or sell the ones that he had already fixed or get rid of 500 of them in two days. Seunghyun was almost proud of his daddy, except for when he got angry. 

Mae had sent Seunghyun to his room earlier when one of the scabs on his back had torn, making him bleed through his shirt. His dad was upset that he had gotten blood on the carpet, and he had started yelling at him again. So Seunghyun played with his cars on the floor of his bedroom, wishing that the scabs would hurry up and do their job so that they would quit itching so goddamn bad. 

Goddamn was his favorite English word nowadays. He had said it on the playground, and all of the other kids had giggled at the delicious fun of learning a foreign swearword. They had always admired that Seunghyun was so daring as to be able to say things like that.

He had learned it from one of daddy’s work associates, a kind man named Mr. Seyfried. He always brought American candy in his pockets with him when he came to visit daddy, and Seunghyun never got into trouble when he was at their house, so Seunghyun liked him a lot. Seunghyun played with his trucks again when he heard men yelling in the living room, and Seunghyun got worried. Maybe someone was upset about the guns again. 

He wandered out of his room to the hall. He wanted to make sure his mommy was okay, but he couldn’t see her anywhere. He hoped that she had gone out to the grocery store or even to go over to her friend’s house, because when daddy and his friends started yelling sometimes his mommy got hit. Seunghyun didn’t like that. 

“Seunghyun,” his daddy bellowed, “Seunghyun, get over here…” 

Seunghyun sighed. He wished he had stayed in his room to play with his trucks, but he knew better than to make a face. He walked purposefully over to his daddy, knowing that if he lollygagged it would be worse for him. He could already smell the liquor on his daddy’s breath. 

“Seunghyun, why don’t you make a few welcoming gifts for our guests?” his daddy asked. 

Seunghyun obediently slid the marble tile out from under the coffee table. He placed it carefully on top of the scarred wood, carefully sniffing the air. He smelled boiling water. He knew that probably no one else could smell it, but he knew it was there, and he felt the tears pricking at his eyes as he very carefully pulled out a thin cotton piece of paper and sprinkled green leaf onto it in a fine, straight line. His eight year old fingers did their very best at picking out the black seeds, and then he folded the paper in half and started rolling it between his fingers as tightly as he could. He licked the edge of the paper where the sealant was, and then he smoothed down the edges and twisted off the ends. He lit the joint, holding a zippo to the end while he sucked in to pull the fire into the rolled paper, and then gave it to one of his daddy’s friends before he sat down to make another one. 

Soon, all of the men had their pot and Seunghyun stood at the edge of the living room, shaking like a leaf. Did he do it right this time? Were they all happy? He didn’t make any mistakes, did he?

He heard it then, the popping sound of his mistake, a small seed left in one of the joints. His father’s. Of course it had been his father’s. Seunghyun felt the tears falling down his cheeks, he knew he had screwed up and punishment was coming. 

His father waited until his friends had left the apartment, some of them rubbing Seunghyun’s head and calling him a good kid, but Seunghyun couldn’t stop shaking. They thought it was because he couldn’t handle lighting all those joints, and he wished it were that.

The smell of boiling leather in the kitchen hurt his nose and he wanted to scream. His heart was racing and he heard his father’s footsteps walk into the kitchen. He knew his dad was putting on the thick cotton glove, and he fell to his knees because he knew what was coming, and the wounds from the last time hadn’t even healed yet. 

“You probably thought that seed popping in my face was funny, didn’t you, you little shit?” 

Seunghyun tried to think about the brownies that he was going to be feeding that night. He wondered if they wanted sugar in their milk tonight, because he thought that it might make them come for him. 

“You want me to be all scarred so that it’s harder for me to do business, don’t you?” 

Maybe if he started leaving pizza crusts instead of the crusts from his toast, maybe then they would come and keep his sheets clean. He hated sleeping on dried blood. 

He heard the water dripping from the boiled leather belt that his daddy had taken out of the pot. He was shaking so hard he peed himself.

“Goddamn it,” his daddy said, “You’re going to clean that up when I’m done with you, you piece of shit.” 

Goddamn it, Seunghyun’s lips whispered. He loved that word, he thought, as the belt came down across his back with a thick staccato sound. Goddamn it. 

Seunghyun opened his eyes, staring across the large white bed that he had been sharing with Alexander for six months now. The man lay sleeping like an angel, his blond hair messily strewn about on the pillow, his pale eyelids closed over his sky blue eyes. 

Seunghyun wished that he could love him, but he didn’t. He let the man fuck him, hell, he had even fucked the man once in a while, but there was no love between them. They were kind to each other, and Seunghyun pretended that he didn’t notice that Alexander would go out to get some emotional fulfillment once in a while, and Alexander pretended that he didn’t hear Seunghyun calling him “Ji,” once in a while. 

Seunghyun got out of bed. He had a meeting with the Columbian government that afternoon, and he didn’t want to be late.

It was driving Alexander mad, being so close to Seunghyun and not having all of him. It was the most insane thing he had ever done, and he wanted so much more and he hated himself because he was never going to get it. 

He had tried so many different things: seduction, cheating, neglecting, smothering, being cute, dressing up, being casual, talking about philosophy and art, being sexy, being intellectual…

There was only one thing left, and Alexander had been putting it off for five months now. He waited until Seunghyun was gone, and then he took the helicopter when it came back from dropping Seunghyun off at work. 

He flew over the Outer Banks, staring down at the beach. He told the pilot to land outside Jiyong and Dongwook’s house, but it was empty. He walked along the sidewalks right outside of Atlantic Beach, and that’s where he found Jiyong, sitting on a blanket, selling sea shells.

He stood, staring down at the fine boned man, wondering what the hell made him so incredibly fucking special in Seunghyun’s eyes. 

Jiyong looked up with a blinding smile, but it fell when he saw who was standing above him. “Alexander?” he asked, a little breathless. 

“It’s me,” he said, glaring down at Jiyong.

“Where is he?” Jiyong demanded. “Where is Seunghyun?” he stood up so that he wouldn’t have to crane his neck as much, but the other man was still almost a foot taller than he was. 

Alexander sighed. “He’s not yours anymore,” he lied, “Seunghyun is mine.” 

Jiyong gasped, but he hadn’t been expecting Seunghyun to stay loyal now, had he? “Fucker, he’ll never be yours, no matter what…” 

Alexander raised an eyebrow. “I fuck him every night. Sometimes, he fucks me…” 

“Then why are you here?” Jiyong wasn’t retarded. “If y’all are so busy fucking each other, why the fuck would you be here?” 

Alexander stared at the boy, cold lightening flashing from his blue eyes. Jiyong wasn’t about to let this opportunity lie though, and he pushed a few buttons on his cell phone in his shorts pocket. “Where are they, Alexander?” 

“They’re safe. All of us, we’re all safe.” 

“Amanda’s with you too?” Jiyong asked. 

“Yes, Amanda… She’s with us, too. We’re taking care of her.” 

“You have no right to keep her away from Dongwook…” 

“She knows that we need to keep Seunghyun safe from you…” 

“What the fuck am I going to do to Seunghyun? He’s my soul mate, you think that I could actually hurt him without destroying myself?” 

“I think you did a pretty damn good job of that the last time you were around him. You don’t know what he was like after that, you don’t know…” 

“Where’s Amanda?” Alexander turned to see Dongwook striding up the sidewalk. 

“Wookie,” Alexander greeted him seconds before Dongwook wrapped his hands around Alexander’s collar, getting in his face. 

“Where is she? Where is she fucker? Where did you take her?” Dongwook was desperate. “Where did you take my baby?” 

Alexander’s eyes got wide, “How did you know…” 

“Know what?” Dongwook asked, studying Alexander’s face. Realization dawned on his face. “She’s pregnant? She’s going to have my baby?” 

Alexander mentally kicked himself for letting that one slip. “Look, I just came here today…” 

“You can’t possibly change the subject, fucker, take me to my woman and my baby now,” Dongwook growled, hitting a pressure point right below Alexander’s jaw with his finger. Pain bloomed like a flower inside of Alexander’s face, and he almost hurled at how bad it hurt.

“Fine, fine. I just want Jiyong to come along so that I can prove something to myself, too.” 

“What?” Jiyong asked, his eyes narrowed. 

“I just want to prove to myself that Seunghyun really doesn’t love you anymore,” Alexander said. They glared at each other, and then Alexander led them back to the helicopter. 

Seunghyun got back from his meeting with the Columbians early. He took his tie off and then went to the ground floor master suite, where Amanda was sitting with some cross stitching that she was doing. 

“Hyunnie,” she greeted him with a smile on her face. 

Seunghyun walked into the room of the only person who ever truly loved him with a smile on his face. Not for the first time he wished that he was straight and not in love with Jiyong so that he could give this woman what she deserved, what she should have had with Dongwook, but she gave up so that she could stay with him. She was his only family. 

Seunghyun came in and dropped a kiss on her forehead, his fine boned fingers spreading out along her expanding stomach under her white cotton tee-shirt. “How’s my nephew?” he asked with a smile on his face. 

“He’s been trying to play soccer all day,” Amanda laughed, her blue eyes sparkling. “I keep telling him that he needs a ball, but he just doesn’t listen very well.” 

Seunghyun kissed her belly, his black eyes sparkling like onyx up at her. “He’ll be so smart, with you and Wookie as his parents. He’ll be gorgeous.” 

“I hope so. Do you think that he’ll grow up to be something great?” 

“I hope he grows up to be an artist,” Seunghyun whispered, and he felt Amanda’s fingers comb through his hair. 

“I bought another pair of shoes for him,” Amanda confessed. “Do you want to see?” 

“Of course,” Seunghyun said with a smile on his face. He followed her to the nursery that he had built onto her bedroom, and she led him to the largest closet that every newborn needed. Inside were diaper bags and toys and onsies and bottles, crib sheets and piles and stacks of clothing and rows and rows and rows of shoes. Seunghyun had spent so much money on his nephew already, and Amanda loved him for it. 

“I bought these,” she held up a pair of ridiculously tiny blue tennis shoes with monkeys on the side. 

“I don’t know Amanda,” Seunghyun teased. “I don’t know if my nephew is going to be a monkey kind of man…” 

“He’ll love them,” Amanda giggled, and she wrapped her arms around Seunghyun’s waist. 

“I know he will. He’ll love everything he gets from his beautiful mother, I just know it,” Seunghyun said, kissing her forehead. “He’s going to have a perfect childhood, and we’ll protect him from everything.” 

“Will he have ponies and friends and birthday cake?” Amanda asked, leaning her head against her step-brothers shoulder. 

“And kittens and puppies and cotton candy,” Seunghyun added. “He’ll have everything that we never had, Amanda. I’m going to take care of us.” 

Seunghyun held Amanda’s hand as they walked to the kitchen together, giggling about all the stupid things they were going to do for Amanda’s son as he was growing up. Seunghyun owed it to her, owed it to Dongwook to raise the boy in a perfect environment. 

They passed through the Great Room on their way to the kitchen, and Seunghyun only saw it out of the corner of his eye, but he shoved Amanda behind him and drew his Desert Eagle, clicking off the safety latch with his thumb. 

“Whoa,” Alexander said, standing in front of the pistol to make sure that Jiyong and Dongwook didn’t get shot. “They’re not here to kill you,” Alexander said. 

“Damn it, ‘Lex,” Seunghyun spat. “You know what I said about bringing strangers in the house.” 

Alexander took the gun out of Seunghyun’s hands, knowing he had at least three more on him somewhere, and he put the safety on and pulled the clip. He kissed Seunghyun on the lips once before giving Jiyong a look, and then he gestured for everyone to sit down. 

“I thought that we all needed to talk,” Alexander said. “Things need to be said without the geriatrics running around,” this is what they called their parents when they were away from them, “because I don’t think anyone’s issues are being settled.” 

Seunghyun slowly let Amanda come out from behind him, and he figured that Alexander was probably pretty right when it came to the way that Dongwook’s eyes devoured Amanda. She had such a tight grip on Seunghyun’s hand that he was afraid that she might break it, but she looked at Dongwook in the exact same way. 

Seunghyun sighed. “Amanda, why don’t you take Wookie to your room, we’re not going to need you two here anyway,” he said.

“Are you sure that you don’t need me?” Amanda asked, turning her head to look at Seunghyun but her eyes stayed glued to Dongwook’s face. 

“Go,” Seunghyun urged her, hoping that she would remember to let go of his hand first ‘cause otherwise he didn’t think that he was getting it back ever. 

Amanda and Dongwook came together in a kiss, and Dongwook’s hand was on her stomach and his other one was buried in her hair. 

“To your room,” Seunghyun repeated himself, and Dongwook picked Amanda up, his lips never leaving hers, and they weren’t in the room anymore as Amanda gestured where to go to Dongwook. 

Seunghyun stared at Alexander and Jiyong, expressionless as ever. The two men sat down on the white sofas in the Great Room. White sofas, Jiyong thought to himself. He wondered if they were the same ones from Seunghyun’s apartment. 

They sat in the room in silence for a long time before Seunghyun cleared his throat. “What possessed you to go get Dongwook and Jiyong, Alexander? After all we had done to keep ourselves hidden?” 

“I don’t think that we made the right decision,” Alexander said. “I can’t compete with a ghost, so I wanted you to see that he really doesn’t love you and that you need to move on.” 

Seunghyun turned expressionless eyes to Jiyong. “I know that he doesn’t love me,” he said. “There has to be more to this than Jiyong not loving me, it’s something that we all know. He told everyone in my family already, Alexander…” 

“So then maybe I needed you to see him again so that you would know you don’t love him anymore,” Alexander continued. 

“I thought that we had established that I don’t love him anymore every night when we fuck,” Seunghyun said simply, without emotion.

Jiyong winced. So Alexander wasn’t exaggerating about that, or just saying it to make Jiyong feel badly.

“Fine, you look at him and tell him that you don’t love him,” Alexander challenged Seunghyun. “Do it. Do it now,” he instructed.

Seunghyun stared at Jiyong, his eyes cold and expressionless. He made himself not think, not feel, and he remembered the scent of boiled leather. He did as he was told. “I don’t love you.”


	2. Chapter 2

This was silence that Jiyong was staring at. Seunghyun had made his absurd declaration, and it was followed by silence. Jiyong waited, knowing exactly how this was going to affect the atmosphere in the room.

Alexander shifted in his seat first. Jiyong wasn’t surprised. This was a poker game and Alexander didn’t hold any cards and might have been playing Monopoly, as far as Jiyong was concerned. Alexander didn’t know what it was like to be Jiyong or Seunghyun, he didn’t know what words or facial expressions really counted. 

Seunghyun was waiting, too. He hadn’t actually said anything at all, really. His declaration at Alexander’s direct prompting meant nothing. Both of them knew it and they knew the other knew they knew it. They were staring at each other to find out what the real score was. Both of them understood that unless something was said of their own volition, as long as some action happened because they started it, nothing counted. Jiyong could almost see Alexander asking Seunghyun to fuck him, and Seunghyun obeying. Jiyong wondered how much of their relationship was Seunghyun obeying whatever Alexander asked of him. Alexander would never understand that kids like Jiyong and Seunghyun, unless they did it themselves, could do a million things that they found distasteful as long as someone told them to do it. Seunghyun might even hate Alexander, but if he saw Alexander as an authoritarian figure, Seunghyun would do whatever Alexander wanted. 

Jiyong remembered Seunghyun’s mother telling him to love Alexander.

Alexander had no idea what was going on. He almost cursed himself for bringing Jiyong, as he and Seunghyun had been staring at each other, waiting for the other man to move for ten minutes. Alexander wondered if they were sending each other invisible signals or something. He wanted to scream, this was not how it was supposed to go.

Jiyong’s mind started working quickly. It was about self-preservation at this point, and having Seunghyun in his life was a necessity for self-preservation. He had to find a way to make sure that Seunghyun was going to keep him around, because after that he could make the man fall in love with him again, or at least get comfortable with the idea of loving Jiyong again. Jiyong knew he had screwed up, knew that for a long time, but he wasn’t one to wallow in self-pity because of that.

“Can I have my old job back?” Jiyong asked.

“Yes,” Seunghyun answered, a little surprised at himself. What the fuck was he thinking, letting Jiyong back into his life like that? 

“What job?” Alexander asked, confused and concerned. He could feel Seunghyun slipping out of his fingers. 

“Is it okay if Wookie and I live here for a while? We’re remodeling…” Jiyong kept his voice casual.

“Yes,” Seunghyun said again. He wondered what demon possessed him. 

“Do you still have all my old clothes, or do I need to go shopping again?” Jiyong asked, not breaking eye contact with Seunghyun. He knew what he was doing.

“Everything is in a bedroom upstairs,” Seunghyun admitted. 

Jiyong wasn’t going to push anymore, because that would be acting like something hadn’t happened between the two of them and he wanted Seunghyun’s trust just as much as he wanted Seunghyun’s love and even more than he wanted Seunghyun’s kisses, if that were possible. 

“Show me which bedroom?” Jiyong asked, and Seunghyun nodded. 

“Oh fuck no,” Alexander said, glaring at Seunghyun. “You did not just tell that man he could stay at our house…” 

“It’s just for a little while, Alexander,” Seunghyun said in a tone of voice that let Alexander know he didn’t give a shit what he thought about it.

Alexander glared, not willing to fight with Seunghyun in front of Jiyong. He didn’t want Jiyong to know how divided they were because he was afraid that information would give Jiyong ammunition in this fight, and Jiyong already had him outgunned and outmanned.

Alexander made himself sit on the couch and watch Seunghyun walk Jiyong to the bedroom he knew that Jiyong would be moving into. He knew that Seunghyun wouldn’t cheat on him because Seunghyun was a strictly-by-the-book guy when it came to things like that. Unless Seunghyun considered himself to be cheating on Jiyong with Alexander.

Alexander buried his face in his hands. If he could get up and walk out of this house, he would. If he could leave Seunghyun the fuck alone, he would. The man was cold; coaxing a reaction out of him was like waiting for ice to melt in winter. It was just that every time he was apart from him he couldn’t get him out of his thoughts. He had spent the last nine years trying to not think about his younger step-sister’s younger step-brother. He had tried to move on, he started other relationships, he thought about becoming a monk, he worked extra hard in the military. That first glance he had taken of Seunghyun might as well have killed him, because he hadn’t truly lived since he first saw him. 

Amanda had brought him with her to Sweden when his father had married her mother. Her mother claimed that the two of them were inseparable and she couldn’t get her to leave her little Chinese brother at home, but Alexander kind of looked forward to having a step-sister who had loyalty like that. Sure, he was twenty-seven and she was nineteen, but he figured that he could give her some good advice and maybe beat up a couple bullies for her and give a stern talking-to to any boyfriend that she might eventually have. 

He didn’t know that her younger step-brother had already taken up the mantle of her protector. He heard some of his younger sister giggling about Amanda’s step-brother to their mother, so he went down to the pool to find out what the fuss was about.

It was the first time he had ever seen Amanda. She lay there in a string bikini, talking shyly with his brothers and Eija. He thought she was one of the prettiest girls he had ever seen and was instantly charmed by her. He thought she would fit in rather well with his family, and he sauntered over to introduce himself. 

That’s when he saw Seunghyun, standing behind her, holding her hand. His dark hair contrasted with the blonds and browns of his family’s hair, and his eyes were guarded, nervous, and wary. He was so beautiful that it hurt Alexander when he breathed, and he took a step back, his eyes open wide in shock.

Alexander had been around beautiful people all his life, but he had never seen anyone look like Seunghyun as young as he was and have such tortured eyes. 

Alexander had fallen in lust before, he was twenty-seven God damn years old. He figured that was all this was, inappropriate lust for a sixteen year old boy. The kid would do something that would remind Alexander of how young he was, and then the lust would be over, and Alexander could go on his merry way and hopefully seduce some girls who were going to show up for his dad’s third wedding so that they could seduce him or one of his brothers. 

Except Seunghyun never once acted like a kid. He didn’t sneak any of the champagne, he didn’t fall into the giggling teenage crowd, he was quiet and respectful and so protective of Amanda, like he had seen the worst humanity had to offer and he didn’t want any of that touching his step-sister. 

The guys had gotten up early the day before his dad’s wedding, and they had all gone out to go shooting together. Seunghyun had been included, but he was silent all the way there, staring out the car window worried. Alexander tried to joke with him, all of Alexander’s brothers had tried to joke with him, but Seunghyun just stared at them like he didn’t understand what was going on. It was a respectful silence, and it was off-putting but it wasn’t offensive in the least. 

They kept trying to get Seunghyun to try shooting one of the guns that the range master had laid out for them, but Seunghyun kept politely refusing. Alexander wondered if the sixteen year old boy wasn’t scared of the weapons, so he told his brothers and dad and uncles to lay off the kid, feeling protective of him out of the guilt he felt for his lust. 

There was a group of business men though, who were from Thailand. They kept looking over at the Skarsgard party and Alexander had egotistically thought that it was because they were so famous, but one of them came over. 

He said something in Korean, and Seunghyun answered back quietly “Choi Seunghyun mida,” respectfully. Then the Thai man yelled back at his compatriots, “It’s really him! It’s the Choi boy!” 

The Thai men came over excited, patting Seunghyun’s head and calling him a good boy, handing him their weapons and wanting his opinion on them. Alexander and all of his family stared in shock as Seunghyun stripped down each of the Thai businessmen’s weapons in seconds, inspected them, reassembled them, and then shot each and every single one of them once into the bull’s eye of the target, pointing out flaws in the body and how to improve the site and which weapons were better, and then he started talking about the weapons and how much each had paid and who had got cheated and who had cheated the seller. 

The range master had been attracted to the growing crowd of people around the sixteen year old Korean American boy, and Alexander heard him whisper, “Seunghyun Choi? The son of Hanjin Choi?”

Alexander was saw the flash of fear in Seunghyun’s eyes at his father’s name, but it was there and gone so quickly that he knew no one had seen it but Alexander, who was watching him so closely. He also noticed that Seunghyun was getting anxious with so many people crowding around him, so he signaled to his family that they needed to take the boy away from the crowd. 

It was something that the Skarsgard family knew how to do: get their people out of crowds of people quickly and efficiently without a lot of fuss. They had more than enough experience getting themselves away from people, so protecting Seunghyun was not a big deal at all to them.

Stellan, Alexander’s father, asked a few questions about how Seunghyun had known so much about guns, and Seunghyun had guiltily answered his questions like it was a bad thing that he knew all that. Alexander noticed that any time one of his brothers had moved too quickly around Seunghyun he flinched, but again no one in his family was watching him closely enough to notice. 

Alexander had known enough guys in the army to know what those signs meant, and his heart broke for the beautiful boy sitting next to him in his family’s car. He wanted to take care of him and protect him, and with his slightly chubby but still pretty damn lanky body Alexander thought that Seunghyun would probably let him, too. 

Except he didn’t. Seunghyun didn’t seem to recognize that Alexander was trying to help out, keep him shielded from the crowds, make sure that he had the best food. All of his family thought it was strange, the amount of attention he paid to the sixteen year old kid, but Seunghyun never seemed to notice. 

So Amanda and Seunghyun had flown back to America where she lived with her dad, and where Seunghyun was going to start college with her that fall. 

Alexander actually almost forgot about Seunghyun, except for the times that his dad would say something about his step-daughter, or when they were picking out Christmas gifts for him, or when he heard that Seunghyun was getting a 4.0. Except for those times, he didn’t think about Seunghyun once. 

So when Amanda came again with her younger step-brother to visit her mother in Sweden for two weeks, it was only coincidence that Alexander was visiting his dad for the same amount of time at the same time. 

Seunghyun’s body had stretched almost overnight, and he was now tall with the most ridiculously long legs Alexander had ever seen on a man. His hair had gotten long, and Alexander longed to brush it out of Seunghyun’s expressive eyes. 

Stellan talked with Seunghyun a lot about stocks and bonds, and Seunghyun gave Alexander’s father advice on how he thought that Stellan should invest. He said that since meeting him last summer he had watched many of his movies and had taught himself Swedish, and then Stellan was impressed as Seunghyun proceeded to carry on the conversation in Alexander’s language with only the slightest of Korean accents. 

Alexander took Amanda and Seunghyun around to some clubs and shopping malls, but Alexander could tell that Seunghyun wasn’t comfortable with a lot of people around him. Even though most of them weren’t gun fanatics, they still seemed interested in Seunghyun simply because of the way that he looked. Alexander took to positioning Seunghyun between himself and Amanda, purely to protect him from other people’s stares. 

They spent most of their time in the Skarsgard home though, and Alexander was shocked at how brilliant Seunghyun was, how quiet and mature. He really enjoyed being around Seunghyun. 

His destruction though, the thing that made him fall irrevocably in love with Seunghyun, didn’t happen until he was twenty-one and Alexander was thirty-two. 

Seunghyun had come with Amanda again, almost finished with his Master’s degree and entertaining job offers left and right. He and Stellan once again were talking about something, but Alexander was only half listening to his dad, being busy not studying Seunghyun’s face and his expressions. Amanda had come into the kitchen where they were hanging out and she had sat on Seunghyun’s lap, curling up in his arms, content and happy. Seunghyun had started braiding her hair while she rested her head on his shoulder, not missing a beat in his conversation with Alexander’s father.

Amanda then sat up, smiled like an imp, and then burped really loudly for no apparent reason. Seunghyun had thrown his head back and laughed, and the dorkiest sound that Alexander had ever heard came out of his mouth. It was loud and hilarious, and Amanda and Stellan were laughing at Seunghyun’s laugh, and Alexander couldn’t move because he had fallen in love. 

Alexander lifted his head up from his hands, trying to not relive that moment when his heart had decided what his head had been arguing against for years. He wondered if there was any way that he could have made different decisions, should he have stayed away from his dad’s house while Seungyun was there? Was there any way to avoid his dad’s wedding? 

The opportunity that had presented itself when Seunghyun was heartbroken over Jiyong had been too much temptation to pass up, but Alexander regretted it bitterly. He should have romanced the younger man, should have wined and dined and seduced, but the relationship had started out with sex so that was all it was ever going to be. Alexander wanted so much more, but it was never going to be his.

It wasn’t going to stop him from fighting like hell for that chance, though.

Seunghyun took Jiyong up the stairs to the first bedroom on the left. It was large, and Jiyong thought that the closet might have been the size of Dongwook’s living room at the little beach cottage that they had never moved out of. His clothing took up a pitiable amount of space inside of the room, but it was all very neatly hung and obviously well taken care of.

“You miss me,” Jiyong stated. It was stating the obvious, and to the two of them they might as well have been stating that they were breathing air.

“It doesn’t matter,” Seunghyun said. His eyes were cold, as if he had built a wall of ice around his heart and his soul. 

“No, I don’t suppose that it does,” Jiyong agreed. He was just going to have to bring out a few blow torches and get rid of that damn wall. “It’s okay if I stay here? I don’t think that Wookie will be coming out of Amanda’s room for a while now.” 

“It’s fine,” Seunghyun said. He sighed, and then he pulled out his cell phone, quickly dialing Jiyong’s number. Jiyong didn’t bother answering the phone, he knew what Seunghyun was doing. It was the first step back into his life. “That’s my number. I won’t be home a lot, but if you need something while you’re here you can text me or something. Your credit cards are in the top drawer of that dresser, and you can take any of the cars you want to if you need to go get something. I’ll call you when you have to work.” 

Jiyong nodded, watching with large degrees of self-control as Seunghyun left the room. He was going to have to start at square one with him again. It was obvious that Seunghyun still cared about him a lot, but just as obvious that Jiyong had broken him and that he couldn’t just step back into that vacancy that he had left. He almost wasn’t jealous of Alexander at all. Almost. 

Jiyong fell on the fluffy white bed in the large bedroom, staring at the ceiling. Their parents’ history didn’t matter. Their history didn’t matter. The only thing that was important to him at this point was proving to Seunghyun that he could be trusted to never drop his fragile heart again, and there was nothing that could do that but time.

 

Alexander sat on the edge of the bed he had picked out for Seunghyun, watching his young lover taking his clothing off in that precise way of his, folding his suits before placing them in the laundry basket. He had found it cute the first few times Seunghyun had done it, but it hadn’t taken him long to recognize it for what it was: his lover was too uncomfortable to relax around him.

Alexander wanted to be comforted by his lover, but The Guilt prevented him from even asking for it. He stretched his long body along the bed and briefly wondered how much longer he had with Seunghyun. He tried to not cry, to not weep and wail and rage, but it was so difficult. 

Seunghyun climbed into their bed and shut the lights out, and Alexander watched him staring up at the ceiling for a time before he reached over and pulled him into his arms. Seunghyun let him kiss his lips and eventually started kissing him back, running his long fingered hands through Alexander’s blond hair, closing his eyes against Alexander’s tongue intruding into his mouth. 

Alexander tried to fight against the images that Seunghyun was just a very responsive blow up doll, but it wasn’t working. He knew he was getting no emotions out of this, and it made him angry. He kissed him harder and dragged his hand down Seunghyun’s back, and he felt the results of another man’s anger, and tenderness replaced that emotion so quickly that Alexander was briefly dizzy. 

“I love you,” Alexander confessed, feeling like the words burned his tongue as he whispered them against Seunghyun’s neck. “I love you.” 

“I know,” Seunghyun said, and Alexander could feel regret and Seunghyun’s own guilt in those words. 

They made love slowly that night, Alexander constantly stopping to check to see if everything was okay with Seunghyun, deciding to man up and back off at the first indication that Seunghyun was sad or that he didn’t want what Alexander was doing to him. Seunghyun didn’t give him any indication that he didn’t want Alexander inside of him, and so they continued. 

It wasn’t until they had both finished that Alexander saw Seunghyun crying. He pulled the other man into his arms, his heart breaking as crystalline tears fell down Seunghyun’s face. “Don’t do this,” he begged Seunghyun, using his large body as a shield against the outside world. “You’re breaking my heart, don’t do this, please!” 

Seunghyun clutched Alexander tightly around his back, crying into his chest, confused and torn. “I don’t understand, Alexander,” he begged him for something that didn’t make any sense. “I don’t understand why it feels this way.” 

“Shh…” Alexander shushed him, kissing the top of his head. “We all had our first loves, Seunghyun. Every single one of us. We grow older and we move on…” 

“It hurts,” Seunghyun said. “God damn it, it hurts so bad…” Seunghyun almost laughed, but it was a choked sound that caught in his throat and got stuck there. “God damn it.” 

Alexander said nothing. There was nothing he could say at that point that would make Seunghyun stay with him, so he remained silent so that he could steal one more moment with him.

“Thank you,” Seunghyun said, surprising the shit out of Alexander. 

“What?” 

“You think that you don’t mean anything to me because I let you think that,” Seunghyun said, looking up into Alexander’s very blue eyes. 

Alexander got very still, his heart beating loudly. He had modeled swimwear in front of a thousand screaming women, and he had never felt this nervous before in his entire life. 

“You’re beautiful. You’re kind and caring and compassionate. You honestly give a shit about me. You’ve helped me keep my head up these past six months. You’re amazing,” Seunghyun said. 

Alexander wanted to cry. This was good-bye then. He took a deep breath and waited for Seunghyun to say the words that would eject him from his bed and his heart and his life. 

He was kind of surprised when Seunghyun fell asleep in his arms then, out cold with exhaustion and spent passion. Alexander was completely confused, wondering what the fuck had just happened. He had thought that this was something that only girls did, and he tried not to laugh at the utter weirdness that was his relationship with Seunghyun.

It might not be perfect, but there were good times. Alexander knew when Seunghyun woke up from a nightmare even though he never screamed, never trembled. He just opened his eyes and stared at Alexander like he was trying to remember where he was, and then he would look so relieved that Alexander wanted to cry for him. 

The only thing that had given Alexander pause about the two of them actually meaning something to each other, instead of him feeling like he had butted his way into Seunghyun’s life, was once when Alexander had walked in while Seunghyun was staring at his back in the bathroom mirror. Seunghyun looked up at Alexander, his face a tragedy of guilt and hurt, and Alexander had just stopped and waited for him to say something.

“Am I ugly?” Seunghyun wanted to know, his face bewildered. 

“What?” Alexander asked.

“Am I ugly? Why do people always stare at me? They can’t see what’s on my back, is it written on my face?” 

Alexander stared in shock. This man thought he was ugly? 

“You probably don’t want to answer that. My feelings won’t be hurt if you tell me the truth, Alexander. Is it because I’m ugly?” 

Alexander turned Seunghyun around so that he could stare at him in the mirror, his large arms enveloping Seunghyun’s slender body. He leaned down to rest his chin on top of Seunghyun’s head momentarily until he straightened out, his long fingers touching Seunghyun’s right eye. 

“This eye is only slightly smaller than your left eye. Your nose cants slightly to your left. Your ears are only slightly too big. Your lips are just a little thin. All of these imperfections still make you the most gorgeous man I have ever seen, and my entire profession is being surrounded by gorgeous men, Seunghyun. No one knows what is on your back except for me, and I don’t talk about it with anyone but you. When people are staring at you, it is because they cannot get over how beautiful you are. Some people might notice that your eyes are haunted, but that only adds to your attraction because they want to rescue you.” 

Seunghyun met Alexander’s blue eyes in the mirror, boldly looking into him. “Do you want to rescue me?” 

“Every day,” Alexander confessed. “Every day I want to be your knight.” 

Seunghyun rested in Alexander’s arms. “I wish you had been with me when I was younger. You’re so much bigger than my father.” 

Alexander tried not to let Seunghyun’s confession floor him, but it was difficult. Seunghyun never wished for anything but what was right in front of him. If he hadn’t built his empire up around him while Alexander watched, he would think that the man had no ambition whatsoever. It was also the first time that Seunghyun had ever named the person that had scarred his back, and Alexander was honored that Seunghyun had confessed to him.

He still wasn’t certain exactly what Seunghyun did or why he was gone all the time, but he did know that Seunghyun had more money than he knew what to do with, and he sponsored plenty of political candidates. Alexander had been the trophy boyfriend at more than one benefit dinner, but he never cared about any of that. And Seunghyun had given him his own credit card that he had been free to use whenever he wanted something. 

He never used it, though. Alexander made more than enough money to support himself with relative ease. Plus, there was The Guilt. The Guilt kept him from so much in this relationship. Seunghyun’s ice walls were only part of their problems, if Alexander was being honest. The Guilt was the other half. Alexander couldn’t let himself accept anything that Seunghyun offered him because The Guilt was a barrier between them. Their crazy awkward relationship was going to need a lot of fixing, or it was going to have to be abandoned. 

Dongwook woke up thirty million times in the night to make sure that Amanda was still next to him. She was sleeping, exhausted from their love-making and from the baby. Dongwook fell instantly in love with the sonograms that Amanda had so proudly showed him, he touched the clothing and the toys and the diapers and the furniture in a kind of wonder, pausing after Amanda had showed him any single little thing to kiss her lips or run his hands over her face and body until she smacked his hands away laughingly. 

They had made love five times, whispering words of love and longing, telling each other how much they missed the other person. Neither one of them apologized, neither one of them felt that they had done anything wrong or that the other person had made a wrong decision. They hadn’t chosen another person over the other, they had simply done what they had to do. 

Instead of fighting, which is something that Dongwook knew most people would have been doing, they spent their time together kissing and holding each other, and Dongwook had a blast exploring Amanda’s new body: her swollen breasts, her growing stomach, her much larger rear end. He kissed and licked her skin everywhere, and she had squirmed and wiggled and laughed and sighed. 

Her mouth didn’t really leave his body, either. Dongwook knew how much she had missed him when her tongue wrapped around his fingers and his nipples and his dick, each movement perfect and lovely. He ran his hands through her thicker hair, loving the way that the sun streaming through the window made her hair look like thirty different shades of gold and silver and yellow and with only a few strands of red. He loved how her very blue eyes looked up at him, her long eyelashes swept his cheeks while they were kissing, her body moved in perfect counter rhythm to his invasion. 

He felt his baby kicking in her stomach, and he looked at her in such wonder. He sang to her belly, which charmed her socks off and had inspired another round of love-making. He rested her head on his shoulder afterwards, content and relaxed for the first time in months. He was back where he belonged, in her arms at last. 

The helicopter was filled with tension on Jiyong’s side as he sat, alone with Seunghyun for the first time in six months. Seunghyun was talking via webcam with Amanda, who was detailing his schedule for the day. 

Jiyong had learned that as soon as Seunghyun and Amanda had found out that she was pregnant she no longer came with him on his trips anymore. 

Jiyong was dressed in a cottony grey shirt that Seunghyun had bought and added to his clothing rack while he was away. He had a few other pieces there that were beautiful, but this one hung off his shoulder and showed off his clavicle, which Seunghyun seemed to like. He also wore a pair of dark blue jeans and bright yellow $300 tennis shoes, along with bright yellow gold jewelry with bright yellow diamonds in them. He knew that he looked stunning, and he could tell by the way that Seunghyun very carefully didn’t look at him.

The helicopter landed and Seunghyun got off the pad with Jiyong. They were in the middle of Tennessee somewhere south of Nashville, and there was a large factory seemingly out of nowhere. 

Jiyong knew that this had something to do with whatever Seunghyun did for a living, but it was so hard for him to concentrate on whatever was going on because his eyes drank in his lover at every opportunity. 

Seunghyun was in the middle of a bunch of politicians, touring the factory and asking the occasional question. Seunghyun answered in that deep voice of his, commanding attention from every single one of them. They walked for about an hour and a half, and Seunghyun shook hands with shift managers and grunt employees alike, and as Jiyong could tear his eyes away from Seunghyun he saw gun parts laying around. 

They started walking outside of the factory, and Jiyong realized that there was a large scale shooting range out back. He stared in fascination as men in lab coats shot guns with scary precision at targets, taking data and studying the impact of the holes left by the bullets. 

Seunghyun’s job started to make more and more sense, and Jiyong didn’t know how he felt about it. 

Jiyong was shocked though, when Seunghyun picked up a few of the guns to test them, and he shot them repeatedly into the bull’s eye of the target. He looked really good doing it, too. Jiyong tried to control his lecherous thoughts, but it was true. 

“Do you want to shoot?” Seunghyun asked him.

“I don’t know how,” Jiyong confessed, looking at the gun warily. 

Seunghyun smiled at him, and he handed him a rifle. He pointed out a few things, and then made Jiyong hold the rifle up to his shoulder. “Tuck it in firmly, or it will kick back and bruise you. Put your shoulder forward a little bit so that you remember. Take aim with your right eye, line up the site here with the tip at the end of the gun with your target. Don’t pull the trigger, just squeeze it as softly as you can…” Seunghyun was explaining, but Jiyong was having problems concentrating because his arms were around him and he could smell his cologne and it was making him dizzy.

Jiyong shot the gun, and it was fun. He got to shoot a few different types of them, and then Seunghyun let him shoot some pistols, which were much more difficult to aim. He had to lock his elbows and hold on to the gun with both hands, and he realized how much gun shooting like the movies in Hollywood was completely fake. If his elbows hadn’t have been locked the gun would have flown back and broken his nose, the recoil was so heavy with some of them. 

“I design my street weapons specifically so that both hands are needed,” Seunghyun explained. “If someone shoots another person on the street thinking that they’re going to look all gangster doing it, they’re going to go to the hospital if they don’t know what they’re doing ‘cause my gun is going to break their nose. If you try the pistol I designed for the military, I think that you’ll find that the recoil is much softer…” Seunghyun gestured for the weapon to be brought out.

Jiyong was shocked. Seunghyun was telling him essentially everything that he did in his business, and Jiyong couldn’t believe that he was being so open with him. What in hell was going on? 

They got back into the helicopter after spending five hours at the shooting range. “Why did you want me to go with you to your factory?” Jiyong asked. 

Seunghyun looked out the window. “So you know…” Seunghyun put his sunglasses on to block out sunlight. “So you know what I’m talking about when I’m selling dangerous products to people. I don’t just deal with governments, I deal with gangs and dissidents and anarchists. You might want to rethink being my business partner.” 

“Why wouldn’t you tell me this earlier?” Jiyong asked.

“I wanted you with me too much earlier to be completely honest with you,” Seunghyun said.

That hurt, Jiyong decided. That meant that Seunghyun didn’t want him with him or he didn’t care if Jiyong ran away. That was painful and not at all a good feeling. 

On the other hand, it could also mean that Seunghyun was trying to chase him away as a method of self-preservation. Jiyong decided that he was going to look at it like that, and he smiled at Seunghyun. 

Seunghyun stared back at him, expressionless. He then pulled his tablet back up and started working on documents that were in that thin piece of metal, and Jiyong sat back and eye raped Seunghyun until he looked back up at him. “What?” he asked.

“I was just checking you out,” Jiyong said honestly. 

“I’d rather you didn’t,” Seunghyun said curtly.

“I was imagining you naked,” Jiyong continued like Seunghyun hadn’t said anything at all. “I was imagining licking your shoulders and your nipples, and I wondered what kind of sounds you would make if I did that…” 

“I’m with Alexander,” Seunghyun reminded Jiyong.

“Why?” Jiyong asked. “Did you come on to him? Do you love him? Do you dream about him every night after you two have fucked?”

Jiyong already knew the answer to those questions, so he wasn’t surprised when Seunghyun didn’t answer. 

“I remember how you sounded when I straddled you, Seunghyun. I bet you don’t make those noises for him. I bet your breath doesn’t catch the same way that it did for me…” 

“That’s enough. I’m not interested in you trying to seduce me, Jiyong. You’ve done it before, and you could probably do it again. You won’t get the same thing from me that you got before with seduction, though. You’re here to do a job, and that’s all I want from you now. I don’t want your body anymore, Jiyong. I don’t want your lying tongue, either. All I want is you to do your job,” Seunghyun said.

Jiyong knew he had moved too quickly, but he wasn’t about to give up with just one mistake. 

 

When Seunghyun was four years old, he promised himself one thing that had carried him in good stead his whole life: never beg for anything. Mistakes and more importantly punishment wouldn’t happen if he did everything perfectly and tried his hardest all the time. It was exhausting, but the philosophy got him through life even when it was tough, helped him live through what most people would have broken under, protected him and kept him from becoming a monster like his daddy. 

As he got older, he discovered the writings of Martin Luther King Jr., and he applied them to his own life. Excellence would overcome hatred. So Seunghyun strove to be excellent in everything because hatred was the basis of violence. School, relationships, and life, every single aspect of Seunghyun’s life had enough effort put into it so that he could become excellent. 

That could be why he was a self-made multi-billionaire at the age of twenty-five. It might be why he had his MBA and his juris doctorate by the time he was twenty-three. His modus operandi had served him well his entire life. 

Jiyong only enforced these decisions for him. Seunghyun had never let anyone in as far as he had let Jiyong in. He had tried his hardest with him, too. He wanted everything perfect, so he didn’t throw the man down and just fuck him even though there was so much opportunity. He had been planning to take Jiyong somewhere nice so that when they did make love it would be memorable. He wanted everything to be perfect. 

Seunghyun had begged Jiyong to let him make everything perfect, breaking his promise to himself. He hadn’t cared about it at the moment, hadn’t cared about anything but Jiyong walking out on him, he had humiliated himself to keep Jiyong and he was never going to do it again. It served no purpose. 

How was he supposed to feel, now that Jiyong wanted back in? Was he going to just leave again after things got hard? And why should he give up Alexander, who had been good to Seunghyun for absolutely no reason at all other than he liked him? 

Seunghyun looked over at the window seat in his bedroom, where Alexander was stretched out reading a novel, and he was briefly taken aback at something he had never noticed before. Alexander was really hot. How had that escaped Seunghyun’s attention before? He supposed he knew it on a subconscious level; Alexander modeled, after all. It just never hit him that the man was beautiful.

Alexander looked up to find Seunghyun staring at him. “What?” he asked with a little smile on his face, kind of startled. 

“You’re beautiful,” Seunghyun blurted out, surprised. 

Alexander paused, and then he scowled. “I liked you better when you didn’t notice that.” Apparently, just as Seunghyun didn’t want to be wanted for his money, Alexander didn’t want to be wanted for his looks. 

Seunghyun walked over to Alexander and took his face in his hands. “But you’re really beautiful.” He still wanted Alexander to know that he found him attractive. He felt like it was the least that he could give him. 

Alexander put his book down and wrapped his arms around Seunghyun. “You don’t need to notice that. Just know that I love you.” 

Seunghyun kissed the top of Alexander’s head, wishing that he could say the words back to this man. He couldn’t though, and Alexander appreciated that at least he wasn’t getting lied to. “Of course, you have to be beautiful ‘cause you dropped out of med school and that’s the only way you’re going to be able to pay your bills now,” Seunghyun joked. 

“Or I could just find myself some young sugar daddy and mooch off of him for a while,” Alexander joked back, picking Seunghyun up and tossing him on the bed. 

“I don’t know if a sugar daddy would take you in,” Seunghyun laughed when Alexander dove on top of him, tickling his sides so that he could hear that loud dorky laugh again. 

Jiyong walked past their open bedroom door, watching Alexander and Seunghyun play fighting on the bed. He leaned up right next to the open doorway, out in the hall where Seunghyun couldn’t see him, and clutched his chest. It hurt to see them like that, joking and having fun. If it had just been about sex it wouldn’t be so confusing, but it looked like Alexander and Seunghyun were at the very least friends. 

Jiyong regretted again that he had made the decision that he had made. He couldn’t use shock as an excuse, if he were being honest with himself. He made himself walk away towards the living room even though he had been going to the kitchen. 

He found Dongwook and Amanda sitting downstairs on the couch looking at a baby name book. “How about Hubert?” Dongwook asked Jiyong.

“What?” Jiyong asked, blinking a few times so that he could clear his mind. 

“Do you think we should name the baby Hubert?” 

“Why would you do that to a child?” Jiyong asked as Amanda laughed. 

“A horrible name like Hubert will make our baby want to get a job so that he can pay a judge to change it. It’ll be great for his work ethic,” Dongwook declared. 

“I am not naming my baby Hubert,” Amanda said. “Nor will I name him something so that he will have a better work ethic, Wookie.” 

Jiyong laughed at the two of them, trying to not feel so utterly alone. He hadn’t really ever felt alone until he had been away from Seunghyun; before that, alone was just the definition of his life. The foster system tried its hardest to not let kids feel alone, but sometimes the camps that he got sent to would just make that state all the more obvious. He was okay with it though, until Seunghyun came along.

He had changed Jiyong’s life, opened his eyes to a much larger world than just North Carolina and the beach. He had filled Jiyong’s heart and then when he had disappeared it made him feel incredibly empty inside. 

Jiyong wondered exactly how he was going to win Seunghyun back. Had he really committed such an unforgivable sin? He panicked, not knowing how he was supposed to react to the son of the man that killed his father. He knew that he was damaging Seunghyun when he walked out and to be honest he had wanted to hurt him, hurt his entire family for reacting to him that way, and he knew hurting Seunghyun would hurt them. It wasn’t noble or great, and Jiyong was ashamed of himself. 

It had taken him two days to figure out that he couldn’t handle it. He couldn’t turn away from Seunghyun out of some misplaced loyalty to a man that he had never met. Who was to say that life with some unnamed father wouldn’t have been worse? Also, why in the world would he have been in America in the foster system when he got shot? Why had he been living with his English speaking grandparents instead of his parents for three years? Who was his mother? 

There was too much to think about, but two days were enough to point out one very important thing to Jiyong. No matter what, he needed to be near Seunghyun. Seunghyun made him feel loved and cherished and special. Seunghyun hadn’t hidden his fascination with Jiyong, hadn’t held back on wanting to spoil him and wanting to treat him like an angel. 

Jiyong wanted that again, he wanted it and he was going to fight for it. He hadn’t ever fought for anything in his life, finding that if he just accepted things as they came along he would be fine. He didn’t want that anymore, and he decided to pit his will against Seunghyun’s and Alexander’s. He never had anything in his life worth fighting for, but Seunghyun was it. 

Dongwook and Amanda had moved from Hubert back to Horace, and Amanda was threatening to throw the baby name book out and get a new one by the time Seunghyun and Alexander came down the stairs together.

Jiyong stared at how much taller Alexander was than Seunghyun. The man was pale, too, and that intimidated Jiyong just a little bit. He was a supermodel and Jiyong was just a beach bum with artistic aspirations. Jiyong stood up and walked out of the room, just needing to stay away from Seunghyun and Alexander together as a couple, just for a minute.

Seunghyun watched him leave with an uncomfortable feeling in his chest. He reminded himself about his promise, and how that promise had gotten him as far as he had gotten. He felt a hand rubbing the back of his neck, and he smiled up at Alexander, who seemed to know how he was feeling. He pulled that hand off his neck and held it as they sat down on a couch perpendicular to the one that Amanda and Dongwook were sitting on. 

“Have you come up with a name yet?” Seunghyun asked. He was glad that Dongwook was there to name the child, because Seunghyun felt slightly panicked at the thought.

“No, Dongwook isn’t going to be allowed to name our child,” Amanda said darkly. 

“You don’t think that Eustace is a good name?” Dongwook looked up at her, bathing his eyelashes up at her, bringing his face in close so that he could make kissy faces at her.

Amanda planted the flat of her hand in Dongwook’s face and pushed him gently away. “Anyway, you and Jiyong have a job today. You’re flying out in about forty-five minutes, and you’re still not ready. Does Jiyong know?” 

“I’ll text him,” Dongwook said, pulling out his cell phone.

Seunghyun looked up, confused. “I don’t remember a job….” 

Amanda shrugged. “It’s a new one with MS13 again. They just called about two hours ago and they wanted to know if you could talk to them a little more. They said that they were willing to give up territory in Houston and Dallas for an extra forty cases.”

“How much territory?” Seunghyun asked, interested. 

“They said thirty blocks in total. Are you interested?” 

“Let me call the Texas Rangers and the local police departments,” Seunghyun said. “Send me maps of the disputed territories and the proposed boundary changes.” Seunghyun stood up and thought some more. “Tell Jiyong that he needs to look good.” 

Dongwook started texting again, and Seunghyun walked up to his room so that he could put his suits on.

“How are you holding up?” Amanda asked Alexander. 

Dongwook got very still and looked up, and he wished he knew more about Seunghyun’s relationship with Amanda’s step-brother for Jiyong’s sake. He had watched Jiyong living in misery without Seunghyun for six months, and he hated that Jiyong’s reunion with his lover was not as joyful as his own.

Seunghyun dressed himself with trembling hands. He was going to have to touch Jiyong on this job, and he wondered what the other man would do with the information that his touch would give him. Would he find out how much he desperately wanted him? Would he use that information to hurt him? How in the world was he going to handle this situation? Why wasn’t this easier?

Alexander leaned up against Seunghyun’s closet door while the man put the gray pin-striped suit on with the light blue tie that he had jokingly picked out to match Alexander’s eyes. “Before you go,” Alexander said, sad resignation in his eyes, “I need you to know something.” 

Seunghyun looked up at Alexander, started by the other man’s presence. “What’s going on baby?” 

“I love you,” Alexander said. “I need you to know that I love you, and I want the best thing for you.” 

Seunghyun frowned. “I don’t understand.” 

Alexander walked over to Seunghyun, smoothing his fine hair back off of his face. He kissed him slowly, thoroughly. “I love you, okay?” 

“Alexander…” Seunghyun desperately wanted to tell him those words. “There are parts of you that I love…” 

“I know,” Alexander said. He kissed Seunghyun again, leaving his lips swollen and red. He ran his hands over Seunghyun’s body, leaving him aroused and pliant. “I know,” he repeated, stepping back slowly from Seunghyun. 

Seunghyun looked into his lover’s sky blue eyes, “We’ll talk more when I get home, okay? You can tell me what’s wrong then.” 

Alexander just kissed Seunghyun again, and then when Seunghyun left he whispered, “No we won’t, baby. We’ll talk much, much later than tonight.” 

Seunghyun and Jiyong got into the helicopter, the wind blowing their hair around. They didn’t bother fixing the problem at all, and Seunghyun stared down at his Tablet while they were moving. He was talking to some official sounding people, sending documents over the Internet while they moved through the air, still negotiating between the terrorist organization and the Texas police department.

“MS13 are terrorists?” Jiyong asked, nervous. 

“InterPol defines them as terrorists. They just used to be a Hispanic gang based out of El Salvador, but they’re highly organized and international now. I’m about to get them to pull out of thirty blocks of territory in three major cities in Texas though, as long as the police think that they can keep the other gangs from claiming that territory after they’re gone.” 

Jiyong stared at Seunghyun. “You’re negotiating territory trade with guns?” 

Seunghyun looked up at Jiyong, his look dark and brooding. “My father shot your father over a territory dispute, Jiyong. How else am I supposed to prevent that from happening to any other kid from going through what we went through?”

Jiyong swallowed hard. “Was the territory in South Korea?” Jiyong asked. 

Seunghyun swallowed, remembering the story that his mother had told him before she had gone back with Mr. Seyfried. “In a sense.” 

Jiyong could tell that it was bothering Seunghyun, so he didn’t press any harder. “This is a very dangerous job this time, isn’t it?” 

Seunghyun nodded. “Yes, this is going to be one of the worst jobs.” 

Jiyong swallowed again, and they rode the rest of the way in silence. 

Seunghyun tried not to stare at Jiyong. When he had told Dongwook to make sure that Jiyong dressed well, he had no idea that Jiyong would make himself look like… this. He guessed that was part of being an artist though, knowing how he could make something more beautiful with a few little things here or there. His eyes were accented with eyeliner, but he had on clothing that did nothing to hide the lines of his body. Seunghyun almost swallowed his tongue in lust, but he knew about that emotion and he fought it. Nothing good would come of touching something that he could not keep. 

They walked away from the helicopter, wind blowing through their hair again as they entered a warehouse. Jiyong wondered if Seunghyun was armed, and he was nervous as all get out. 

They met a group of men in the middle of the warehouse, gang members lining the sides of the building. 

Seunghyun shook hands with the leader, who gestured for chairs to be brought for Seunghyun and Jiyong. The gang members also brought a table and chairs for the leader and three of his subordinates. The language was Spanish again, and Jiyong tried to look sexy and alluring, but it was hard when he knew all the facts and he was intimidated by the men sitting around him. Every single one of them were hardcore gang members and they were all armed to the teeth. The one to the leader’s right had a trail of black tears tattooed to look like they were falling from the corner of his eye, and he kept looking over at Jiyong like he was a tasty treat. 

Seunghyun noticed and eventually reached over to put his hand on Jiyong’s knee. There were a few side glances by the other men, as if their suspicions had been confirmed.

When the negotiations were over and the refreshments were brought out by scantily clad women, Jiyong took that as his cue to take his place on Seunghyun’s lap. He was a little surprised when he felt Seunghyun’s erection against his hip, but it pleased him in any case and he smiled impishly at Seunghyun. 

Seunghyun kissed him quickly on the lips, a movement that left Jiyong on fire, and then he continued to speak pleasantly to the men that were around him. 

Jiyong wasn’t about to let that pass. The other women were working on pleasing the men in whose laps they were sitting, and Jiyong wasn’t about to let this opportunity pass itself up. He slid back into Seunghyun’s lap, fitting the hard length of Seunghyun’s erection between his ass cheeks. He felt Seunghyun’s hands dig into his hips as he leaned back and breathed on Seunghyun’s neck, taking advantage of the opportunity to lick that column with his pink tongue. He felt more than heard Seunghyun’s breath hitch in surprise, and then he kissed Seunghyun’s neck softly. 

Seunghyun dragged his fingers up Jiyong’s back and then buried them in his hair. Jiyong was shocked that he held his face to his neck for a few more kisses before he pulled Jiyong’s face away from his neck by the hair, and Jiyong fucking loved it, being manhandled like that by Seunghyun. 

“Pienso que mi mariposa esta aburrido,” Seunghyun said quickly, “Lo siento.” 

The gang members said something back to them in Spanish, and then Jiyong felt himself being led out of there, being dragged by Seunghyun’s hand. He knew he was going to get it in the helicopter, but his lips were buzzing with the taste of Seunghyun’s skin and his hips felt bruised from where Seunghyun had grabbed him.

“A thousand dollars, plus a tip for having to touch me,” Seunghyun said, counting the money off to Jiyong.

Jiyong had only momentarily forgotten he was a whore, but this was a harsh reminder. He took the money and pocketed it, and they were silent for the rest of the trip home. 

 

Dear Seunghyun, 

He had found it lying on the bed when he got home. Seunghyun had desperately needed to talk to Alexander, needed reassurance that he was making the right decision, needed to see his golden hair and his blue eyes, and he had, instead found a note.

I’m in the way. You need to figure this stuff out with Jiyong, and I don’t want to see you again until you do. I’m giving you four weeks, and then I’ll contact Amanda for an update. This is me, being a good man. I want you to love me, but I don’t think that you can while you’re still confused about Jiyong. If you can get your heart straight, come back. If you can’t figure it out, then I’ll stay away longer. If Jiyong is the one you want, fuck you. I’m a jealous man, Seunghyun, and I don’t want to be your consolation prize because that kid made a mistake with you. I don’t want to see ‘what if’s’ in your eyes when you look at me. I want there to be only one person in your heart, and I want that person to be me. If it isn’t possible, then I need to work on getting over you and staying next to you isn’t going to do it.

I’m modeling in… I don’t want to tell you where I am. I have a job for four weeks. That’s all you need to know. Fix your shit with Jiyong or get him out of your heart and out of our house. If you get back together with him… don’t do it in my bed. I can’t handle that.

And Alexander didn’t sign his name or anything. That was it. It was written in peacock blue ink and on nice parchment paper, and Seunghyun held it crumbled to his chest as he cried. He knew why Alexander was doing this in his head, but his heart only recognized that Alexander had left him. 

Things weren’t perfect with the Swede, but damn did he have to leave? Especially when Seunghyun was this torn? They could have made things work if he could have just stuck it out with Seunghyun, but he was gone and there was no way to get him to come back. 

Seunghyun lay awake in his bed all night by himself. What else was he supposed to do? Sleep never treated him kindly, except for those few times he had been in bed with Jiyong, but that didn’t count anyway. Because he said so. Seunghyun sighed. He needed to deal with this Jiyong thing, and if he couldn’t deal with it he was going to have to get another fake lover because being next to him…

He remembered the feeling of Jiyong’s body sliding up his, nestling Seunghyun’s cock right between his cheeks. Seunghyun had thought he had exhibited superhuman amounts of self-control by not reacting, and then he realized that he was gripping Jiyong’s hips like a fat man with a piece of cake. And then Jiyong had fucking run his tongue up Seunghyun’s throat, breathing on his saliva dampened skin and then placing fucking kisses on that area. 

Seunghyun had to pull his dick out of his pants at that memory. It had been too fucking good, and Seunghyun had started conjugating Latin verbs to keep himself from thrusting his hips up so that he could grind his rock hard shaft up into Jiyong. He had to keep himself from raping Jiyong’s mouth with his own and he had wanted the other man so fucking badly he was about to push him over the God damn table and fuck him in front of all those cholos. He had to treat him coldly in the helicopter even though his original plan had been to reestablish their working relationship, and the entire time he had thought about commanding Jiyong to get on his fucking knees and suck his cock. He thought about thrusting harshly between those butterfly lips, and as that thought got stuck in his mind he fisted his desire and took a couple of punishing dry pulls off of it. 

He reached up into the dresser drawer so that he could grab some lube that Alexander had always kept there and then he froze. What the fuck was he doing? Did he think that Alexander would want Seunghyun masturbating to the thought of Jiyong in his bed any more than he wanted Seunghyun fucking Jiyong in his bed? Was he really that far gone? That was probably why Alexander had left: he knew that Seunghyun was lying to himself about how much he wanted Jiyong. 

He needed to reevaluate this entire situation. Yes, Jiyong was going through a stressful time, finding out that Seunghyun’s father had killed his father. Yes, Seunghyun’s family was often times overwhelming and obnoxious. 

Most importantly, Seunghyun thought, eyeing his fucking pecker, he was going to have to take care of this problem almost immediately, because it was going from pleasurable nuisance to fucking painful with a quickness. 

When he got to the shower though, he couldn’t do anything about it. It went away when it knew it was about to get taken care of without Jiyong. Seunghyun was angry, and he tried to get it back but it just hung there like it hadn’t just been crying for some love and tenderness not five minutes previously. 

He gave up after he realized that it was three o’clock in the morning and he was arguing with his cock. He went back to lie in his bed and he smelled Alexander, and it wasn’t helping him at all so he wandered down to the kitchen to get himself some water. He poured it straight from the filter on the tap and then took a deep drink, sleepily running a hand through his hair. He turned quickly when he heard a sound behind him, reaching to the waistband of his sleeping pants for a gun that wasn’t there, and then water drooled out the sides of his mouth when he saw Jiyong. 

He took the glass away from his mouth and wiped his face with the back of his forearm, looking at Jiyong startled. “What are you doing up?” he demanded, pissed when his fucking erection came back at the sight of the other man. 

Jiyong looked at him sleepily, rubbing his eyes. “I just woke up and I was thirsty,” Jiyong said, wandering over to the cupboard with the cups in it. 

Seunghyun moved far away from temptation, so quickly that it was hard to cover up that it was what he was doing. It was too late to be subtle, anyway. Jiyong looked over at Seunghyun, one eyebrow raised as he drank water. 

Seunghyun watched fascinated as Jiyong’s adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he took deep gulps of the water. He watched as a little trickle escaped and ran slowly and sensuously down Jiyong’s chin, down his throat, and disappeared into a shirt that Seunghyun desperately wished wasn’t there so he could continue to watch that droplet’s journey down Jiyong’s body. 

He wrenched his eyes tightly closed, why the fuck wasn’t Alexander here to keep him safe from this man? It was so much easier to be immune to Jiyong when he had Alexander waiting for him upstairs in his bed. 

“Why are you so tense, Seunghyun?” Jiyong asked, his dark citrine eyes wide open. He walked over to Seunghyun, touching his naked shoulder. 

Seunghyun flinched, wishing that he had worn something more than a tank top to keep him protected from Jiyong’s touch. Like maybe a parka. Or an old European suit of armor. 

Jiyong held his hand up, thinking that maybe Seunghyun was going through a flashback. “Hey,” he said softly, “I’m right here beside you. Everything is going to be okay…” 

Seunghyun barked out a bitter laugh. Nothing was going to be okay, he was going to have to deal with things and neither Alexander nor Jiyong were being of any help at all right now. Alexander wasn’t helping because he wasn’t here, and Jiyong wasn’t helping because he was right there fucking beside Seunghyun. And Seunghyun’s dick was crying again, painfully so. 

Seunghyun grabbed Jiyong’s face, and he lowered his own so quickly that their kiss consisted of clashing teeth and biting lips and violent thrusting tongues. Seunghyun bent Jiyong backwards over the kitchen counter, and Jiyong obligingly wrapped his legs around Seunghyun’s waist, holding onto his hair with all his might. They snarled into each other’s mouths, and Seunghyun’s hands weren’t gentle as he squeezed Jiyong and tore that offending tee-shirt off of his body. He tasted so goddamn good, and Seunghyun ground his erection against Jiyong’s, and he held him so close to his body. 

Seunghyun moaned into Jiyong’s mouth, a deep vibration that shook Jiyong to his very core. Jiyong felt his nipples harden and the sound of his voice just danced up and down Jiyong’s spine. He was a little afraid that Seunghyun was going to pull his hair out, but he welcomed anything that the other man was going to do to him. He was just as out of control as Seunghyun was, and he dug the heel of his foot against Seunghyun’s anus, letting the man feel the pressure of where his dick wanted to be. 

Seunghyun continued thrusting against Jiyong, dry humping the fuck out of him. His brain had simply turned off at this point, and he was acting on sheer animal instinct, the need to be as physically close to this man as possible taking over any other thought that had been in his head. 

“Seunghyun,” Jiyong moaned, tilting his head back as Seunghyun’s lips trailed down his throat. Jiyong’s hips moved up against Seunghyun’s, just as desperate for the man as he was for him. He more than wanted him, and he would take him any way that he could get him. “Please,” he begged, and that was when Seunghyun came to his senses. 

He ripped himself away from Jiyong, throwing himself back against one of the ovens, touching his lips as he stared wide-eyed at Jiyong, who looked pleased that Seunghyun had almost just raped him on the kitchen counter. Not that it would have been rape in Jiyong’s eyes, but Seunghyun saw it completely differently. “Sorry,” Seunghyun said, startled at himself and Jiyong and what had just happened. 

“I’m not complaining,” Jiyong said, sitting up slowly, trying to gingerly move around his erection and the bruises on his hips. 

“I shouldn’t have, I didn’t mean…” Seunghyun wanted it to be better, but he didn’t know the words to say. 

“I think that we shouldn’t have stopped,” Jiyong said. “I think that you need to kiss me again.” 

Seunghyun stared in horror. “I almost just raped you, Jiyong…” 

“Can’t rape the willing, Seunghyun…” 

“I didn’t do anything right this time…” 

“That didn’t get us too far last time, if I remember…” 

“We can’t be together. You won’t stay.” Seunghyun’s voice broke. 

Jiyong stared at him. “You think that I’ll leave you again if we get back together?” 

“It’s highly probable,” Seunghyun said. “Everything is easier the second time.” 

Jiyong laughed. “It will never be easier to leave you, my love.” 

Seunghyun took a deep breath. “Jiyong…” 

“No, it’s my turn. Did you know I came looking for you two days after you left? You left nothing of me in that apartment, and you didn’t let me have anything to hold on to while you had disappeared off of the face of the planet. Do you know what it was like for me to have no idea where you were? I stayed home as much as possible, listening for the fucking sound of a helicopter, praying that you would come back for me to give me just half a chance to beg you to take me back. And who the fuck finds me? Your step-brother, who is just more than ready to rub it in my face that he’s fucking you.

“I was okay with that, though, Seunghyun, because I didn’t want you to be alone. I wanted someone to take care of you, and if it had to be that big blond prick then I was going to let him do it. I will hate him for taking what is mine for the rest of my life, Seunghyun, and there’s a part of me that hates you for giving it to him so readily when I had to earn my way, fighting and scrapping and screaming, for the least bit of your affection. Do you know how desperate I was for the least little bit of you? I watched the news, bought Forbes magazine, searched the Internet… you’re the hardest fucking person on the planet to find, Seunghyun. 

“I was scared to find a private investigator because I didn’t know what your real job was. Now I’m glad that I didn’t know, because it would have scared the shit out of me that you were around those types of people and I didn’t have your back. What if one of their girlfriends looked at you wrong? Do you have any idea how fucking beautiful you are? Girls would fling their panties at you regardless of the possibility of you getting shot for it…” Jiyong took a breath. He looked up into Seunghyun’s eyes. “You need me to protect you from them. I need you to breathe. I think it’s a fair trade off, and I think you need to keep me with you regardless of how you feel about tonight.” 

Seunghyun didn’t say anything. He stared at Jiyong for the longest time, and then he left the kitchen. 

Jiyong sat staring at the sink, trying to figure out what the fuck just happened. Jiyong walked back up to his room, and he took a quick shower to rub out what Seunghyun had filled his dick with. He fell on the bed, hoping to get a few more hours sleep before the day started in full swing, and he was pleasantly surprised to find that he had slept until 8:30 in the morning. 

He wandered down to the kitchen again, this time to the smell of eggs and sausage. Dongwook and Amanda were feeding each other breakfast and being disgustingly cute. Jiyong dished himself up a plate from the serving dishes and sat down with them. 

Seunghyun wandered in too, bleary eyed and yawning. Jiyong thought he was the cutest thing that he had ever seen, and he prepared himself to be repulsed by Alexander’s Norse beauty, but he became confused when he never showed up. 

“Is Alexander not eating with us this morning?” Jiyong asked. 

“He’s gone,” Seunghyun said simply. 

Amanda looked up, her pretty blond hair sparkling in the morning sun. “What? Where to? When?” 

“He left sometime when I was gone yesterday. He said he might come back in four weeks,” Seunghyun said, not making eye contact with anyone. 

“Where did he go?” Dongwook asked, surprised as anyone else at the table.

“He wouldn’t tell me,” Seunghyun said, without a hint of emotion to indicate how he felt about the situation. 

“Are you okay?” Amanda demanded to know. 

“I’m fine, noona,” Seunghyun said, slipping into Korean so that she would back off.

“Why…” Amanda tried to ask again, but Dongwook put a hand on her hand, and shook his head. They would talk about it with Seunghyun later, because Dongwook could tell by Seunghyun’s pure lack of emotion that he was uncomfortable with the subject for one reason or another. 

Jiyong stared across the table in disbelief at Seunghyun. Alexander had just upped and left, and Seunghyun knew that when he attacked Jiyong last night? What did it mean? Should Jiyong not have said all that stuff? Maybe if Jiyong had kept quiet, he would have woken up in Seunghyun’s arms this morning. 

Seunghyun ate his food and then he rinsed his dishes and placed them in the dishwasher. He then left the room, and Jiyong and Dongwook and Amanda all started talking to each other quickly. 

“Why did Alexander leave?” Amanda wanted to know, worried about her step-brother. 

“Probably because he thinks that Seunghyun is conflicted about Jiyong, and he’s not the type to put up with that,” Dongwook said, glancing over at Jiyong. 

“He left because of me?” Jiyong wanted to clarify. 

“In a sense. It kind of makes sense. You remember yesterday when Seunghyun left to go get ready and Alexander asked you how many boyfriends Seunghyun had before him? And you said just Jiyong?” Dongwook asked Amanda.

“Whoa, I knew I was his first kiss, but I was his first relationship, too?” Jiyong asked. 

“Seunghyun’s had sex before,” Amanda said, “Did he tell you you were his first kiss?” 

“Are you sure he’s had sex? He didn’t seem to know how to respond to a kiss…” Jiyong looked at Amanda critically.

“I’m not entirely sure it was consensual,” Amanda mused out loud. “He just told me that he had sex before with another man, I assumed that it was when he was in college but now I’m not so sure…” 

“So you think Alexander left because he thinks that Seunghyun is conflicted about Jiyong?” Amanda asked Dongwook again. 

“It’s the only thing that makes sense, but I do know this,” Dongwook said, “If Seunghyun thinks that he messed something up between him and Alexander, he won’t be able to stop blaming himself for being conflicted. We need to find where Alexander went to so that he can reassure Seunghyun that he isn’t the cause for their separation, even if it’s a lie.” 

“I’m not comfortable getting anyone to lie to Seunghyun,” Jiyong said. “I don’t want him hurt ever again.” 

Dongwook looked at Jiyong, knowing how much he had hurt during his and Seunghyun’s separation. “Fine, you need to come up with a different plan, because I know that Seunghyun is blaming himself right now. We need for him to get over that because I know he’s been hurt and I don’t want to see that poor man destroy himself over something that isn’t his fault.” 

Jiyong nodded. It was time to start thinking. 

 

Seunghyun wandered out to the back porch, intrigued by the glimpses he kept getting of Jiyong through the windows, moving about doing something. Seunghyun only wanted to make sure that he wasn’t preparing to blow something up on his back porch, he had no ulterior motives and he wasn’t curious about what the man could be doing at all. At least, that was what he was telling himself. After all, he hadn’t cared what Jiyong had been doing in the past three days, why should he start caring now?

He almost slipped on the plastic drop cloth that covered the ornamental white stone porch. His arms were held out at almost 180 degree angles as he balanced himself, looking up at a startled and slightly guilty Jiyong, holding a paintbrush against a large canvas. “I didn’t know you would be coming outside,” Jiyong confessed. “Are you okay?” 

“Fine,” Seunghyun said, wishing that his dress shoes weren’t so slick bottomed. He glanced around himself, and then his eyes landed on the painting that Jiyong was in the middle of. He had to get closer, he couldn’t stop himself.

It was a large mushroom with an entire village of mice underneath it. There were houses and gardens and paths, lawn furniture made out of thread spools and chairs made out of buttons and sticks and brightly colored thread. Mice children ran around with kites and balls made out of beads, Mice mothers worked in the gardens, mice fathers sold produce from stores made out of handkerchiefs and pine cones. It was a picture that one could lose hours of their life staring into, and Seunghyun knew that he had spent a good twenty minutes staring before he could tear his eyes away to look up at Jiyong, who was simply smiling at him. 

“It’s good,” Seunghyun said roughly. It sucked that he could be pulled into Jiyong’s mind so quickly again.

Jiyong simply started painting Seunghyun’s face, dipping his brush into yellows and greens and blacks again, painting below his eye while Seunghyun held still like a wild animal, unsure of the strange human trying to pet it. 

“There,” Jiyong almost whispered, his eyes kind and filled with love as they looked at Seunghyun. “Now you could play with the sprites…” 

Seunghyun swallowed and then backed up from the other man quickly, falling on his ass from his slick shoes and then scrambling to stand up again. Jiyong moved to help him, but Seunghyun held his hands up so that he couldn’t go near him. 

He escaped inside the house, leaning down to take his stupid shoes off before he ran back to his room. What the fuck was wrong with him? Why was he running from Jiyong? He stared at his face in the bathroom mirror, stared at the swirls and the curlicues that Jiyong had decorated his face with. It was a simple thing for Jiyong to do and not at all sensual, but Seunghyun’s heart was pounding so hard that he wondered if he weren’t having a heart attack. 

He lay on his bed, not wanting to wash the paint off. Did it mean something that he couldn’t take the pigment off his skin? Did it mean that he wanted Jiyong’s mark on him? Maybe he just liked the memory of Jiyong’s brush against his skin, maybe he remembered six months ago when that brush took his scars and turned them into something beautiful. 

He felt the tears then, felt them hot and salty and he hated them. He never used to cry, he never cried until he met Jiyong. He had cried as a child, he corrected himself, remembering the feel of leather parting his skin with a sharp wet sound. He had screamed, but eventually when he learned that the screams did nothing he quit screaming. He had quit crying, too. Jiyong came along and it felt like he hadn’t stopped crying since then. 

Jiyong came in and sat on Seunghyun’s bed quietly. “Hey,” he whispered, like Seunghyun was a wild animal. 

Seunghyun looked around guiltily, glad that he had changed the bed as soon as Alexander had left. He wasn’t sure that he was going to be with Jiyong again, but he didn’t want to take the chance of hurting Alexander, who had really only been nice to him for the most part. 

Jiyong started wiping at Seunghyun’s face with a handkerchief that had been dipped in turpentine. “I painted on you with oils,” Jiyong explained, wincing as Seunghyun’s nose and eyes started running with the strong odor of the chemicals. “But your tears are making the paint run… I shouldn’t have done that to you. I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist temptation.” 

Seunghyun stared at Jiyong, trying to figure out what to say to this man, exactly. “You and I can’t be together,” he started to say.

“Shhh…” Jiyong told him. “We’re not going to talk about being together right now…” 

“You don’t know our family’s full history, Jiyong. You aren’t going to want me and I can’t make myself tell you ‘cause I can’t deal with you hating me for it…” 

“Fine,” Jiyong said, still talking in a soft voice. “Then I don’t need to know. It’s our history, not our future, not our present. I need your arms more than I need my roots…” 

“Jiyong,” Seunghyun whispered, “it’s really not that simple…” 

“I don’t care,” Jiyong said, dragging Seunghyun to his bathroom so that he could wash the turpentine off of his face. “I only want you. I love you.” 

Seunghyun stayed silent, staring at Jiyong as he carefully washed Seunghyun’s face. Jiyong was so beautiful, so serene as he stood in front of him. “What was it like?” Seunghyun found himself asking.

“What was what like?” Jiyong tried to clarify, putting moisturizer on Seunghyun’s face in a mixed effort to keep his skin from reacting to the turpentine and to keep touching him.

“Growing up alone, what’s it like?” 

Jiyong shrugged. “I never had an ally. There were kids who at least had a brother or sister, but I never did. You make alliances, you know certain kids and you know how they’re going to react when they’re alone with you. Sometimes you get a foster parent who is really concerned about the kids, sometimes you get a foster parent where allies are necessary. Sometimes your allies have enemies and then you have to be enemies with someone even though there’s no real r eason to be… you just want to keep that ally…”

“Sounds like a lot of politics,” Seunghyun said.

“Life is politics, Seunghyun. People who can’t see that usually are the ones that get beat the worst.”

Seunghyun stared into Jiyong’s eyes. 

Jiyong was only touching Seunghyun’s skin, marveling at the texture and at the liberty Seunghyun was giving him in doing this. There was no more paint to rub off, no more turpentine to get out of his skin, he didn’t need to put in more moisturizer, so he took advantage of Seunghyun’s state of confusion to simply touch him. 

“My family took your family away from you,” Seunghyun said, reaching up to caress Jiyong’s cheek.

“I don’t think so,” Jiyong said, “I was in foster care in America before my dad got shot…” 

“Not exactly,” Seunghyun said. “My family sent you over here by yourself and then my dad shot your dad.” 

Jiyong paused. “It doesn’t matter. It’s our past. Don’t use our past as currency to buy away our future.” 

“Jiyong, that isn’t what I’m doing. There are things you need to know…”

“I don’t want to know anything,” Jiyong said.

“Do you want to know your mother is still alive?” Seunghyun asked, his eyes closing against Jiyong’s face as Jiyong’s hand stilled on his cheek.

Seunghyun was startled when Jiyong straddled his lap and kissed his lips. Seunghyun’s eyes flew open in surprise. “Look, baby,” Jiyong said, “I need you. You made me so happy, you’re making me happy right now. I feel safe with you, and I feel like I can protect you, too. You make me a better person, and I desperately need to be that person.”

“Jiyong, there’s so many bad things in our past,” Seunghyun found his hands circling Jiyong’s slender waist like they couldn’t help themselves, “We can’t be together. Once you find out, you’re going to leave again. You should leave me again,” Seunghyun said, kissing Jiyong’s neck. “My family is filled with monsters.” 

“I don’t care,” Jiyong stated. “I want to be with you. I want to sleep in your arms again. I want to kiss your lips without money being between us. I want…” 

Seunghyun kissed Jiyong. This time, it was tender and soft and careful. Jiyong kissed him back, welcomed him back into his mouth. Their hands explored each other’s hair and traced each other’s facial features. There was a rightness to their actions, a homecoming to their tongues and lips. 

Seunghyun stood up with Jiyong still wrapped around him, and he walked them out of the bathroom back to the bed. “It’s too soon,” Seunghyun told him, “But I need to taste you. Will you forgive me?” 

“Everything,” Jiyong said. “I’ll forgive you everything, forever,” Jiyong said. 

Seunghyun’s hands were under Jiyong’s clothing, stroking and caressing the smooth skin he found, pulling Jiyong’s shirt off of his torso tenderly, everything done so carefully that Jiyong almost cried with how cherished he felt. 

Jiyong was long and hard by the time Seunghyun unwrapped him, and he took one long, slow lick up Jiyong’s shaft, pausing to lave the drip at the tip of his head, greedily pulling it into his mouth. He looked up at Jiyong, who had his arms flung over his head, gripping on the other side of the mattress as Seunghyun squeezed between his legs, pulling his knees up so that Jiyong could hold on to the mattress with his feet, too. 

Seunghyun bit Jiyong’s thigh a little before he slid his mouth back down his cock, staring at the array of emotions and sensations that were dancing across Jiyong’s face. He was almost more interested in watching Jiyong’s face than he was in performing fellatio on the younger man, almost but not quite. He was too greedy for the feel of Jiyong’s penis sliding across his tongue and down his throat, enjoying the way that it fit just perfectly. He loved being surprised when Jiyong’s hips jerked to shove his cock deeper into Seunghyun’s mouth. 

Jiyong made little cat noises while Seunghyun licked him, moaned loudly when Seunghyun licked his balls and sucked on them lightly, almost screamed when Seunghyun added his hand. 

“I’m gonna… oh God honey I’m gonna…” Jiyong tried to press Seunghyun’s head away from his cock before he came, but Seunghyun sucked him to the back of his throat and swallowed every bit. 

Seunghyun smiled up at Jiyong, who was trying to catch his breath. “That was amazing,” Jiyong said. “You’re amazing.” 

“Lover,” Seunghyun called him, holding him tightly in his arms. “I’m sorry I rushed…” 

Jiyong made him shut up with his mouth. Seunghyun was a little worried that Jiyong wouldn’t like the taste of himself in Seunghyun’s mouth, but he didn’t seem to care. His kiss was still slow and loving, and Jiyong took his time exploring Seunghyun. 

He loved it, and Jiyong was on top of him, holding his face as he stretched out on top of him. “Let me do the same to you,” Jiyong asked, and Seunghyun was entranced with the way that his eyelashes swept up, he loved the way Jiyong’s irises contrasted so sharply with the whites of his eyes. 

Seunghyun held the other man’s head still as he kissed his eyes, wondering if it was weird that he wanted to lick his eyeball. He didn’t though, because he didn’t want Jiyong to be scared of him. 

Jiyong kissed his way down Seunghyun’s body, and his foray into Seunghyun’s pants was nowhere near as clean and elegant as Seunghyun’s dive into Jiyong’s. Jiyong’s mouth was more desperate on Seunghyun, the need rode him stronger and it was wetter and messier and Seunghyun found it so sexy that he came in no time at all, and he stared as Jiyong had Seunghyun’s cum dripping out of his mouth. It was so sexy that Seunghyun wiped the mess off with his thumb only seconds before he sat up and kissed Jiyong’s mouth, ignoring the bitter taste of his own cum. 

“Are we together again?” Jiyong asked, hopeful. 

Seunghyun stopped. “I think that you need to hear what happened to our families before you make that decision.”

“I get to make the decision?” Jiyong asked. He was surprised. “Then I want to get married. Let’s go get married…” 

“Jiyong, you really need to hear…” 

“I don’t want to know.” Jiyong said, settling down and wrapping his legs around Seunghyun’s waist. “If it is something that has you running off into another man’s arms and apologizing before I get the best head of my entire life, I don’t want to know. Those things make no sense, baby. It doesn’t matter…” 

“It matters to my mother. It matters to your mother…” 

“Who didn’t bother to keep me by her side when…”

“She couldn’t keep you, it would have ruined her career to have the son of a gangster…”

“So basically what you’re saying is that there is something in my past that would make me walk away from you because of the memory of a woman who chose her career over me and a man who made me live with his parents instead of taking care of me himself?” Jiyong asked. “I’m sorry, I’m not following your logic.” 

Seunghyun paused. “Jiyong, this is your family…” 

“Why? Because we share DNA? Is that what makes a family? I want to be a family with you. I want to call Amanda my step-sister-in-law. I want to adopt a baby with you. I want to get a dog and yell at him for chewing up the couch cushions and I want him to chase kittens around our house. I want to do home improvement projects with you and I want to hear about your day at work and I want to make love to you every night…” 

Seunghyun shut Jiyong up with his mouth again. “Jiyong, there’s my mother to consider… and we should really meet your mother…” 

“What’s her name?” Jiyong couldn’t stop himself from asking. 

“Misuk,” Seunghyun answered. “Mom said your mama’s name is Misuk.” 

“Is she pretty?” Jiyong asked. 

“She’s gorgeous,” Seunghyun told him. “She’s an actress. Pretty famous, at that.” 

“Does that mean we would have to go to Korea?” Jiyong asked, his heart beating quickly, scared for the first time in Seunghyun’s arms. 

“Ji,” Seunghyun said. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I’ve just learned that you have to face everything head on, and that you can’t hide from what has happened in your past…” 

“I don’t want to be separated from you, honey,” Jiyong said. “I want to throw away everything that will keep me apart from you, and if that includes a family that never wanted me…” 

“I don’t think that’s entirely true, Jiyong,” Seunghyun said. “I don’t think that it isn’t that they didn’t want you…” 

“How else do you lose a kid in another country entirely?” Jiyong asked Seunghyun. 

“You don’t.” Seunghyun sighed. “Please don’t leave me after I tell you this.” 

Jiyong swallowed, and nodded. 

“Our parents, my mom and your dad, grew up next door to each other in Korea. Your dad’s parents went to England to work with the government in some capacity or another, and your dad was left at home most of the time. He and my mom were childhood sweethearts.” 

Jiyong swallowed. He already didn’t like where this was going. 

“So your dad got interested in shooting guns. He went on hunting expeditions and he went to shooting ranges. He was a really good marksmen, Jiyong. He soon caught the attention of my dad, who was always a criminal. He started selling guns to your dad, and your dad would unload them to other people for a tidy profit. Soon, your dad was selling guns to most of Seoul, which, by the way, is highly illegal. You can’t own guns in Korea… which is beside the point. Your dad got caught, and my dad said that he could help him out without his parents finding out if he would owe him just one favor. Your dad agreed to it, readily, because he was seventeen and stupid.” 

Jiyong swallowed again. This didn’t sound like a really great thing.

“Remember how I said our parents were childhood sweethearts?” Seunghyun looked at Jiyong, who nodded.

“My dad had seen my mom a few times when he was at your dad’s house. My mom’s family was very conservative and she was the youngest of three daughters, so when my dad demanded my mother as a repayment for helping him out, there weren’t a lot of protests. Your dad had no power to keep my mother, and so she had to leave to go live with my father. She was pregnant with me not six months later, after he had repeatedly raped her and abused her.” 

Jiyong was crying.

“Your parents met when your dad was drinking after he found out about my mother’s pregnancy. Your dad had quit dealing in guns, and he was studying to be a lawyer when he met your mother. She was already a famous actress, and neither one of them expected to be with you, but your parents loved you, Jiyong. She couldn’t tell the world that she was having a baby with a much younger man, and so his parents had you living with them. You were much loved.” 

Seunghyun continued. “My mom still loved your dad, and she would take me over to play with you when she visited her parents. I didn’t know that, but it makes me feel like we’ve been bonded in a sense…” Seunghyun stopped talking for a moment. “Mom loved you more than me, and she said that I loved you so much I never cared about that. My dad saw that and he would threaten to hurt you if I didn’t do exactly what he said and it worked. I screwed up once though, I can’t remember what I did, and you were seven years old he kidnapped you and sent you to America, but we didn’t know where you had gone until I found you six months ago.”

“It wasn’t enough though, and your dad was tired of seeing my mom and I abused, and then he found out what my dad did to you, and he came at him with a gun. My dad shot your dad, Jiyong, and my mom took advantage of the chaos afterwards with the police and the lawyers to run away with my dad’s business partner, Mr. Seyfried.” 

“It’s my fault, Jiyong,” Seunghyun said. “My father is a monster, and that makes me a monster. I’m not going to beg you to stay, but you need to know what you’re dealing with. I have done no better than my father. I’m a murderer and a weapons dealer. I deal death and I make death and I parcel it out in shiny packaging. I’m covered in blood Jiyong, and you were my first victim when I fucked up and got you taken away from your family. You should have stayed away from me.” 

 

Jiyong’s decision included another long plane ride. Seunghyun sat between Jiyong and his mother, who had finally relented on accepting Jiyong. Seunghyun had man hours to contemplate what he was getting himself into.

Amanda had said that she had talked to Alexander about Seunghyun’s decision. She said Alexander was happy for him, but that he didn’t really want to talk to Seunghyun for the time being. It was fair, although it was horrible at the same time. Seunghyun knew that he couldn’t have everything that he wanted. But he did know that he wanted Jiyong more than anything else, and everything else was just not as important. 

Jiyong lay knocked out by the Dramamine next to Seunghyun. Mae had felt horrible once she learned that Jiyong got air sick, and she wondered how the little boy had fared on his trip from Korea to the United States by himself. Seunghyun was pleased to see her fussing over Jiyong, and she rolled her eyes and said that she used to do it all the time when he was a little boy. 

The changeovers had been done in record time, forty-five minutes between flights had them running between terminals, Seunghyun dragging his mother’s carry-on and a sleeping Jiyong across the airport, wishing that he had just bought his own jet so that they could go without all the fuss. Jiyong had said that he wanted to do everything low-key though, so that no one would notice them. 

Seunghyun could feel his heart beating, his chest pounding so hard by the time they landed in Incheon. He kissed Jiyong’s head to wake him up, glaring at the other passengers who stared at them. He moved his mother and Jiyong through customs, picking their luggage up on the ground floor, hailing a taxi… Seunghyun Choi, hailing a freaking taxi, and putting his family into it. He gave the driver directions in Korean, and then they pulled up in front of the Kwon house thirty-five minutes later. 

Mae had insisted that they not call ahead, she still had a key and her parents still lived next door. Mae took them to her parent’s house first, but the only person home was her oldest sister, who was shocked to see Mae. 

Seunghyun’s aunt was named Sona, and she fussed over both of the boys and fed them almost the minute they stepped inside the house. She fussed over Seunghyun, having had bragged to all her friends about her gorgeous nephew who graduated so early and with so many degrees. 

Mae smiled, and then she made her sister stop talking long enough to inform her that the other boy was Jiyong Kwon. 

The silence in the house was devastating, Jiyong couldn’t meet Sona’s eyes, but she reached over and lifted his head, her eyes filling with tears. “The little Kwon boy?” she asked in Korean.

“Yes, it’s Jiyong,” Seunghyun said. 

Sona spoke so quickly in Korean that only Mae understood her, and then she was on the phone with someone. “We go next door now,” Sona said in English, dragging them through the backyard.

Seunghyun wanted to hold Jiyong’s hand as they were shuffled in the back entrance of a huge house, a maid showing them to the living room. They stared at each other as food was placed in front of them, and Jiyong’s eyes were large and wide and he desperately wanted to touch Seunghyun so that he would feel better. 

An older couple came down the stairs, holding onto each other as they saw the boys sitting on their couch. “Jiyong?” the woman asked, a slight British accent tinting the color of her speech. 

“Yes?” Jiyong asked, a little scared.

“My grandson!” the man said, and the woman was crying. They pulled Jiyong up off the couch into their arms, crying into Jiyong’s shoulder. 

Seunghyun wiped his eyes at the sight. Jiyong was short, but he was taller than both of his grandparents, who only came up to Jiyong’s shoulder. The couple hugged Mae and Seunghyun, too, thanking them for bringing back their grandson. 

“It is fate,” Mr. Kwon decided, “Fate dictated that your Seunghyun would find our Jiyong,” he said after he heard a slightly modified version of how the two of them had met. “The sins of the fathers can be forgiven with the actions of their sons.” 

“Are you two best friends again, then?” Jiyong’s grandmother asked. “You two were so sweet when you were younger, you hated sleeping apart from each other. Jiyong would go through phases where he wouldn’t even eat unless Seunghyun was right next to him…” 

Seunghyun smiled at Jiyong, who just blushed. 

Mr. Kwon left the room for a few moments, and then he came back, his cane making a clacking noise against the wood of the floor. He sat down, and they caught up with what had happened with their beloved grandson while he was away.

“Were you taken in by a nice family?” Jiyong’s grandmother asked. 

“No,” Jiyong admitted. “I was shuffled through thirty-seven foster homes and orphanages.” 

Seunghyun’s heart twinged.

“Did you graduate high school?” Mr. Kwon asked, frowning.

“No, I turned eighteen before I graduated, so I had to find a home before I could go to school, and I didn’t want to go so I just dropped out and moved in with some college kids who lived down the street from one of the foster homes I was in. I sold my paintings to pay rent until I met Dongwook, who introduced me to Seunghyun and now I’m his personal assistant.” 

Mae didn’t say anything else about what her boys were to each other. She knew that most Koreans were too conservative for what her boys wanted from each other, and she didn’t know if the years they had spent in England had broadened the Kwon’s horizons enough to accept what their sons were. 

“Seunghyun takes good care of you?” Jiyongs grandmother asked, looking up from her tea at Seunghyun.

“Until I die,” Seunghyun promised. 

“Good,” Mr. Kwon said, looking fondly at Jiyong and Seunghyun. They sat and talked a little more, and then the doorbell rang.

A very beautiful older woman came in with a boy only a few years younger than Jiyong and Seunghyun. “Miss Lee,” Mr. Kwon welcomed her in. “Miss Lee, he’s here,” he said again. 

The woman started crying immediately. “Jiyong!” she exclaimed. She ran over to him, and Jiyong hugged her without knowing who she was. 

“This is your mother, Misuk,” Mae told Jiyong, and then he was crying, too. Seunghyun had dry eyes in front of the boy he didn’t know, who was looking at Jiyong like he was the most interesting thing in the world. 

“Jiyong, this is your little brother, Seungri,” Misuk introduced him. 

Jiyong and Seungri stared at each other. Jiyong didn’t know how to feel about his replacement, but it was obvious that his replacement was eye raping the man that he had replaced. Seunghyun didn’t like Seungri immediately, but Jiyong was reserving judgement.

Jiyong noticed that his mother kept looking at Seunghyun though, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about that, either. Seunghyun was oblivious, too intent on not punching Seungri in the face for letting his eyes linger on his Jiyong’s arms. 

They visited with each other, his mother unable to hide the disappointment in her son’s list of accomplishments until Seunghyun started talking about Jiyong’s amazing talent with art. He described Jiyong’s art skills like he was selling a gun, going down the finer points of everything he had seen from his living room walls to the mouse painting to the sea shells and the sea scapes that he had seen Jiyong selling on the beach. 

Jiyong was shocked that Seunghyun had paid that close attention to his art, and it made him a little afraid to look at him in front of his new family because he was afraid that they would see the hero worship in Jiyong’s eyes as Seunghyun’s deep voice championed him. 

“And what do you do?” Lee Misuk asked Seunghyun, the interest in her eyes making Jiyong want to take Seunghyun’s hand in ownership. 

“I’m just a business man,” Seunghyun smiled, leaning back as he evaded the question. “Nothing exciting like Jiyong’s art.” 

“What kind of business are you in?” Seungri asked, trying to take Seunghyun’s measure as competition. 

“I sell and negotiate contracts for various organizations,” Seunghyun answered just as vaguely, smiling. 

Mae looked at her son, warning him with her eyes to stay quiet about what he did in front of Jiyong’s grandparents. He blinked at her once, slowly. They knew how to communicate with each other without words, a method of self-preservation that Seunghyun hadn’t forgotten over the years. 

Sona looked at her little sister, surprised that she was so quiet. She had been quiet since she had married Suwan Choi. She wondered what had happened between them that Mae would actually run away and marry that foreigner, leaving Korea behind with her son. She wondered why her parents had agreed to the marriage in the first place, because Mae had cried and everyone had thought that she was going to marry Sangwoo Kwon as soon as they graduated high school. 

“We should go home,” Sona said to Mae, “They need to do some bonding now that they’re back together…” 

Seunghyun felt panicked, they were going to take Jiyong away from him?

“Let Seunghyun stay,” Mr. Kwon said firmly. “He and Jiyong never liked to be separated as children, and there are some things that I would like to speak with him about.” 

“Fine,” Mae said. “Sona and I can go back home, and the boys can sleep here or at our house, whichever they prefer. I’m sure they want to stay together, they always have before.” 

Mr. Kwon showed the ladies out, leaving Seunghyun and Jiyong alone momentarily with his grandmother and the Lees. 

“So you didn’t recognize each other at first?” Misuk asked Seunghyun and Jiyong. 

“No, we didn’t,” Seunghyun said. “Jiyong’s old roommate is the one who recommended him, and things were so hectic during our first couple of meetings that we didn’t get a lot of time to talk,” Seunghyun gave a significant glance to Seungri, but the women in the room didn’t catch it. Seunghyun was good at things like that, and it made Jiyong want to giggle.

Seungri more than got the message, and he smiled confidently at the older man. “That’s interesting,” he said. “Some might say that a more concerned employer would have taken the time to make sure that he had the history of his personal assistant before entrusting him with business secrets. Of course, that’s only if you have a major company, of course.” 

“I’m sure most major corporations work that way,” Seunghyun said, smiling. He was a good boy and didn’t mention that had Jiyong not worked out as his personal assistant, he would have shot him in the head and given his body to the gangs to hide for an extra case of assault weapons. Seunghyun thought that might make him look a little psychopathic though, and not exactly son-in-law material.

“Seungri here is in a boy band,” Misuk said fondly. “You should be proud of your little brother, Jiyong, he’s very famous in Korea. He’s in a group with four other boys, and they are very successful.” 

“I learned everything from my mother,” Seungri said, smiling up at Misuk. 

“He’s such a good boy,” Misuk said. She smiled and wrapped her arm around Seungri, smiling down at him fondly.

Seunghyun wanted to puke all over this woman. He seriously considered how quickly he was going to have to move to be able to projectile vomit over the coffee table and onto her $700 Louboutin shoes, but he reminded himself that this was Jiyong’s mother and he was going to treat her with respect. 

Luckily, Jiyong knew his lover well enough to know it was time to go. “I’m sorry, grandmother,” Jiyong said, yawning a little bit. “We just got off the plane. Do you think that Seunghyun and I could go to bed? We’re really tired…” 

“Of course, how rude of us not to offer. Do you need separate rooms, or is it okay if you share a room?” 

“We can share,” Seunghyun said quickly before Seungri could offer to share a room with his brother. “We’re used to it. We had to share on some of my business trips,” he told Jiyong’s grandmother, smiling charmingly at her. 

“Such a good, smart boy,” she said, reaching up to pinch his cheek. 

As soon as they were alone, Jiyong turned to Seunghyun and buried his head in his chest, sobbing. “I didn’t know that they were going to hate me for being such a failure,” he cried. He clutched Seunghyun’s waist. “I didn’t know they were going to make me feel like that…”

“Hey,” Seunghyun said, “None of that now. None of them could do what you’re doing now, not a single one of them could have made it as far as you did. You are amazing Jiyong Kwon, and as soon as they realize that they’re going to be sorry they ever looked down on you. You’ve got a credit card in your name right now that has a spending limit past what they have in their savings account. You’ve got more talent in your pinky finger than your mom and her other son have in their entire bodies. Combined. Plus, you’ve got me, remember? So you’ve got money, looks, and talent, and they have each other. Isn’t that fair?” 

“I only have money because of you,” Jiyong muttered. 

“So what? Everything I am belongs to you, don’t you know that?” Seunghyun kissed Jiyong’s lips, slowly and tenderly. “I want to marry you. I want you to belong to me forever. Apparently, I’ve always wanted that,” Seunghyun said with a smile. “Your grandparents didn’t even blink an eye when they put us in a bedroom together. Did you notice how many bedrooms were in this hallway alone?” 

Jiyong laughed a little, holding Seunghyun closer. “Make love to me, Hyunnie,” Jiyong said, looking up at Seunghyun. “I want to feel you inside of me.” 

“Not here,” Seunghyun shook his head. “You’re worth roses and champagne, my beautiful man. Let me give you romance, please?” 

Jiyong nodded his head, but he tilted his head back and closed his eyes, expecting a kiss as a compromise. Seunghyun smiled before he leaned down and kissed him. He leaned down only slightly further to grab Jiyong around his legs and carry him princess style to the bed, where he laid him down gently, stretching his body across his, surrendering his weight on top of Jiyong. 

Jiyong was already painfully hard, and he undulated his hips against Seunghyun’s, who ground back. Seunghyun’s fine boned hand found its way down Jiyong’s pants, and he wrapped it around Jiyong’s erection just soft enough to make Jiyong whimper. Seunghyun lay on Jiyong’s side so he could watch his body move as he kissed his lips, watching his face as he ran his hand up and down his cock. He smiled at his lover, who was desperate for him right now. 

He ignored his own desperate situation long enough to watch Jiyong’s graceful hips move in perfect counterpart to Seunghyun’s hand. It felt too good to watch him bite his lower lip and look up at Seunghyun, his eyes begging for mercy. 

Seunghyun smiled, leaning down to kiss Jiyong’s face. He was startled though, when Jiyong started returning the favor, and then it became a contest of wills. Who could be the most quiet, who could drive the other the most out of his mind with their hand alone, who needed to drown their moans with a kiss more. It was the best game that Seunghyun had ever played, and his eyes almost crossed when Jiyong hooked one of his fingers around his balls and stroked it down the middle. 

Seunghyun threw his head back against the pillows, his black hair making a dark ink blot against the crisp white linen. Jiyong kissed him, stroking him to release quickly at that point. He got off on Seunghyun getting off, and Seunghyun took his shirt off so that he could clean them both up. 

They lay in bed and kissed a little bit longer, enjoying their time with each other. “What did you do that got me taken away?” Jiyong asked.

“What?” Seunghyun asked Jiyong.

“What did you do that got me taken away from this family as a punishment?” 

“I don’t want to talk about that, Ji,” Seunghyun said, embarrassed. “I thought you said that it was our past…” 

“Seunghyun…” Jiyong said. “I think that this is something that we need to talk about.” 

“I couldn’t…” Seunghyun covered his face. “Jiyong, I couldn’t swallow… it made me throw up, you see, it hit my gag reflex and I couldn’t…” 

Jiyong realized that Seunghyun was talking about going down on someone and that he had been eight years old at the time. He tried not to throw up. “Seunghyun…” 

“It was too hot and it tasted bad. I’m sorry, I tried to do it right for you, I really did…”

“How have you been living with that memory?” Jiyong asked, completely aghast. 

“I had forgotten it until mom said that you had disappeared a year before we left. I told her about it, and she told me that it was a good thing that we left my father or she would have killed him herself…” 

“Your dad was the one…” 

“He wouldn’t let anyone else touch us, would he?” Seunghyun said bitterly. 

“Seunghyun, it wasn’t your fault. None of this was your fault. What your dad did was wrong and disgusting. You’re a better man that he is. You do know that, right?” 

Seunghyun took a deep breath. “Yeah. I know that. In my head I know that, at least. It’s why… It’s why I want everything to be special for you, between us. I only want everything to be perfect for you, do you understand?” 

Jiyong smiled at Seunghyun, wanting to be brave for him. “I understand.” 

 

Seunghyun almost ran straight into Seungri on his way out of Mr. Kwon’s office. 

He had been negotiating a price of sale for some weapons for the Korean police department, as Mr. Kwon had been given permission from the Korean government because they thought that they would get a better deal with Seunghyun dealing with a relative. They weren’t wrong, Seunghyun thought with an ironic smile as he shook Mr. Kwon’s hand. Seunghyun was only making 15% profit on that sale, when he usually made upwards of 65%. He had made Mr. Kwon swear that the price wasn’t going to be advertised to any other country, even England, because it might hurt his business. 

Seungri studied the taller man that he had been trying to spy on. Jiyong had slept in, leaving Seungri and Misuk downstairs by themselves for breakfast. Seunghyun knew that there was no way he could have heard what they were talking about, so he looked down at Seungri condescendingly, eye brow raised.

“So I thought that you and Jiyong would like to come see my band practice,” Seungri said. 

Seunghyun waited, just because he was having fun messing with Seungri. 

“So I wanted to know if you and Jiyong wanted to come?” Seungri stuttered a little when he asked.

“Sure, that sounds like super fun, Seungri,” Seunghyun said, his voice giving no indication of how he was truly feeling. 

Seungri was an idol, he wasn’t used to being made fun of. He stuttered a bit more and then he wandered off to the kitchen. 

Seunghyun slipped back up to the room that he was sharing with Jiyong, smiling to find his lover still sleeping. He had gone down on him after their impromptu torture session last night, and he was probably still worn out a little. 

Seunghyun cuddled up behind him, kissing his neck and sweeping his hair back from his face. He was adorable when he was all sleepy like this, and it squeezed Seunghyun’s heart a little to see him. 

Jiyong stretched back into Seunghyun’s arms, his ass brushing against his dick which responded with interest. Seunghyun would never stop being fascinated with Jiyong’s body. 

“Lover,” Seunghyun said softly, “Time to get up. We have things to do today, family bonding and whatnot.”

Jiyong arched his spine all sexy like into Seunghyun’s chest. “Don’t wanna wake up.” 

“You’re about to get molested if you keep this up, Jiyong,” Seunghyun warned him. 

“Mmm… but I like it when you molest me,” Jiyong said, turning over to hitch his leg up around Seunghyun’s hip and taking a long, slow grind against his lover’s body. He kissed Seunghyun’s neck, dragging his fingers down the back of Seunghyun’s head, down his neck, tracing the graceful curve of his shoulders and back and finally settling on grabbing a handful of ass so that he could hold on as he grinded against the other man.

“Fuck Ji, we have to get downstairs,” Seunghyun said, kissing the top of Jiyong’s head. He stood up with Jiyong clinging onto him like a monkey. “Didn’t I take care of you enough last night?” 

“I’m just gonna keep getting worse until you fuck me, baby,” Jiyong threatened. “You’d better be making plans in that direction before you drive me insane, and I’m forced to take matters into my own hands.” 

“I like it when you take matters in your own hands, though,” Seunghyun teased, walking Jiyong over to the bathroom. 

Jiyong pouted as Seunghyun sat him down on the bathroom coutner, fixed his toothbrush, and then he took his shower by himself. 

“Seungri wants us to go with him to his boy band practice,” Seunghyun said. “Did you want to go?” 

“He is my brother, so we probably should. Are we going to be safe?” 

Seunghyun wished that Jiyong didn’t have to think about that, but it was a reality. “Yes, as long as you stick with me, we’ll be safe. The Korean government has given me a few special licenses, on account of my job and the fact that I’m supplying their police force with their weapons now thanks to your grandfather… cagey old bastard.”

Jiyong laughed during his turn in the shower, “Did he get a good deal out of you?” 

“Well, he isn’t going to be paying for our kids’ college, if that’s the question you’re asking.” 

“Ouch, that’s tough, Seunghyun. How many kids are we going to have?” 

“I want three. Can we have three?” Seunghyun asked, pulling a naked and wet Jiyong out of the shower as soon as he saw that he was finished. 

“Amanda’s baby is going to need cousins,” Jiyong said practically. 

“Especially if Dongwook names him. Our kids our going to have to defend their cousin Cornmuffin at school,” Seunghyun wrapped his lover in a towel, stealing a kiss from him. 

Jiyong laughed and he pulled on the first outfit that Amanda had bought for him. The military inspired shirt hung open over a white tee-shirt this time, and his jeans were ripped over his expensive brown workboots. Seunghyun made sure that there was a diamond on Jiyong’s ring finger on his left hand, and then he kissed that finger. Jiyong smiled up at him, his heart fluttering. 

“Don’t let Seungri get you alone,” Seunghyun told him. “I’m too jealous of anyone near you right now to be able to deal with that.” 

Jiyong was surprised, but he agreed with Seunghyun. They went downstairs together, and Seungri took in Jiyong’s outfit and his jewelry. 

Seunghyun always dressed so conservatively that it was hard to gauge his pocketbook, but Jiyong was Seunghyun’s excuse to show off. He had spared no expense with Jiyong’s clothing, his jewelry was top of the line, his hair and his facials and manicures were enough to make a woman jealous. Seunghyun took care of his man, and he was proud that Jiyong was beautiful. 

Seungri put them in his car, Jiyong in the front seat with him and Seunghyun in the backseat. Seungri found it interesting that Seunghyun was more interested in their surroundings than whatever he might be doing with Jiyong in the front seat. He figured that it probably showed a lack of care on Seunghyun’s part. 

Seungri had convinced himself that Seunghyun and Jiyong were simply business partners, and Seunghyun wasn’t a very successful businessmen, whatever it was he did. It was obviously something unimportant, as Seunghyun hadn’t told them about it the night before. Everyone always tried to impress Seungri and his mother, trying to let them know that they were just as good as the celebrities in front of them. Seunghyun showed no desire to impress them at all, and had been purposefully vague about whatever it was that he did. 

That meant that Seungri had the upper hand when it came to seducing his brother. It wasn’t like he was his real brother, Misuk had adopted Seungri when he was four so that he could replace Jiyong’s presence in her life. She hadn’t expected to love him more because she could go public with him, as she looked more charitable having adopted a child from a Korean orphanage. Seungri had turned out to be talented on top of that, and he entered into a contract with YG when he was fifteen to join Big Bang, one of the best five member hip hop groups in Korea. 

They arrived at the studio, and Seungri whispered a few words about who Jiyong and Seunghyun were, and they went upstairs to one of the practice rooms. 

“Does he know that Americans think boy bands are lame?” Jiyong whispered to Seunghyun, who smiled at Jiyong. 

“He’s your brother, you should be kind to him,” Seunghyun encouraged. 

“I don’t want to be, he makes me nervous,” Jiyong whispered back in English.

The other members arrived for practice, and Jiyong and Seunghyun were introduced to all of them. 

“This is Daesung,” Seungri said, “This is Jaejoong Kim, this is our leader Jay Park, and this is our rapper Taecyon.”

Seunghyun and Jiyong shook their hands before they remembered that everyone in Korea bowed, and they awkwardly did that, too. 

“This is my older brother, Jiyong Kwon,” Seungri smiled, “and the guy that found him, Seunghyun Choi.” 

The guys all seemed dutifully impressed. They made admiring noises and then it was time for them to practice. 

The music wasn’t as bad as American boybands, and their dance moves were a little better, too. Seunghyun and Jiyong watched in respectful silence, and then they looked at each other.

Music was never something that they talked about with anyone else, but it was something that they both enjoyed. Seunghyun wondered which bands were Jiyong’s favorites, and Jiyong wondered what kind of music Seunghyun listened to the most. There was still so much that they didn’t know about each other. 

They smiled at each other, and Jiyong started whispering into Seunghyun’s ear, “Sublime, My Chemical Romance, Maroon 5, Eminem, Ray Charles…” 

Seunghyun tried not to laugh. “I like Ray Charles, too, and Ludicrous, and Three Six Mafia, and Eminem, Dr. Dre, Fifty Cent…” 

“I can sing. And I make up songs and dances sometimes,” Jiyong continued whispering. 

“I rap. I write it, too, and I can beatbox,” Seunghyun smiled back at him. 

“Are you good?” Jiyong asked. 

“Better than that kid,” Seunghyun nodded at Taecyon. 

Jiyong smiled. “I’m a better dancer than all of them, and I have a better voice,” he bragged.

“I can’t dance, Jiyong…” 

“I can teach you,” Jiyong smiled. 

“No really, when I move it looks like my spine is fused…” Seunghyun flushed. Jiyong briefly wondered if it didn’t have something to do with the damaged skin on Seunghyun’s back. 

Seungri’s band quit practicing their dance, and Jay was going over a few moves again with Jaejoong, while Seungri sauntered proudly over to Jiyong and Seunghyun.

“Good job,” Jiyong said to Seungri. 

“Did you like it?” Seungri asked, smiling at Jiyong and ignoring Seunghyun.

“You were pretty good,” Jiyong said, trying to be nice.

“You think you can do better?” Taecyon asked. 

“Of course not,” Jiyong smiled. 

“Americans always think they’re better than everyone else,” Seungri scoffed, looking at Seunghyun.

“We used to be Koreans,” Seunghyun said.

“Listen to his voice,” Jaejoong said about Seunghyun. 

“Rap,” Taecyon demanded. “I want to hear about how good you are!” 

Seungri smiled in delight, thinking that Seunghyun was going to fail in front of Jiyong. Jiyong grinned at Seunghyun, who was squirming with the attention.

Hell, he thought to himself, at least he would entertain Jiyong.

He closed his eyes and started rapping, letting words drip from his lips like bullets flying through the air. Words that he had scribbled in his journals between his stories fell out, words that he had chanted over and over while he was dealing with something that he didn’t want to deal with, making promises that he hated himself for keeping. When he was done, the room was quiet. He opened one of his eyes to look at the other people in the room, to see if they were still there, and they were all staring at him with their mouths hanging slightly open. 

Seunghyun blushed.

“You want to do a song with us?” Jaejoong asked. 

Seunghyun briefly considered it. “You can’t afford me,” he laughed. 

Jiyong had to sit on his hands so that he wouldn’t take Seunghyun’s hand in his own, so proud of him for being so good. 

“Can you do it, too?” Jay Park asked Jiyong.

“Rap? Yeah, I can rap…” Jiyong said with a smile. 

“Show us,” Jay said, sitting at Jiyong’s feet so that he could stretch out after the workout that they were doing. 

“I can one up that, though,” Jiyong said, standing up. He moved to the middle of the room and mimicked their dance almost perfectly. The boys watched in a kind of wonder, and Seungri wondered if their situations were reversed if Jiyong wouldn’t have done something so much greater than he did, and if maybe Jiyong had just never had an opportunity. It wasn’t a very good feeling, and Seungri rubbed his chest a little as he thought about it. 

Seunghyun loved watching the way his lover’s body moved, it was filled with grace and that perfect balance that Seunghyun assumed Jiyong had gotten from surfing. He wanted to possess him and share him with the world, so that they could know how absolutely wonderful his Jiyong was. 

He wondered if he shouldn’t leave him with Seungri, who was obviously smitten with him, leave him in Korea to dance and sing and rap in a boy band, instead of going back with Seunghyun to the States, to be the lover of a man who dealt death every day of his life. 

What would be best for Jiyong? Would Jiyong choose Seunghyun because he felt guilt over walking away from him before? 

“Let’s go out to eat!” Jaejoong declared, “I’m hungry!” 

The boys were more than thrilled to take Jiyong and Seunghyun out, but Seunghyun was so distracted by his surroundings that it was hard for him to concentrate on the conversation at hand. He so rarely appeared in public because he was afraid that his enemies would attack him. 

Jiyong didn’t understand why Seunghyun was so absent next to him, and he was getting a little frustrated when he kept the conversation going by himself. It wasn’t until he saw Seunghyun jump when someone came up behind their table to pass by that he understood that he had never seen Seunghyun outside an environment where he wasn’t in control. 

It was an interesting insight into how the rest of his life was going to be. Seunghyun would never be able to go out like a regular, every day person. 

It was okay, Jiyong decided. Seunghyun wasn’t a regular, every day person. He was worth the effort, Jiyong smiled at him as he pushed some food past Seunghyun’s lips. “I’ll protect you,” Jiyong whispered into his ear. “Relax.” 

Seunghyun smiled at Jiyong, chewing slowly. 

Showing up at the restaurant with Big Bang had a million people taking pictures of them, which Seunghyun tried to stay out of. The photographers were interested in getting him and Jiyong in the pictures though, because they were both good looking men who seemed to be on good terms with the band. Questions were thrown at them about who they were, but they all ignored them. 

It was kind of surprising to them though, when a bunch of dark suited men filled the restaurant and made all of the patrons but Big Bang and Jiyong and Seunghyun leave. Big Bang looked around in a little bit of confusion, but then one of the men came up to Jiyong and Seunghyun. 

“Choi Seunghyun?” he asked. 

Seunghyun sighed. “That’s me, sir,” he said. 

“Sir, the President would like to speak with you now, if you don’t mind?” 

“Yeah,” Seunghyun said. He turned to Jiyong. “You gonna be okay, sugah?” he asked Jiyong softly, looking into his eyes.

Jiyong knew that he was looking at the rest of his life. There would never be a time where he could be guaranteed Seunghyun’s presence. He was going to have to appreciate the time he did have. He smiled at Seunghyun, wiping a little of the food that they were eating from his mouth. “I’m fine,” he said honestly. “See you tonight?” 

Seunghyun nodded and kept himself from kissing Jiyong as he stood up to go out with the Korean Secret Service. 

“Which president?” Seungri asked, shocked that all of these people were here for Seunghyun. 

“The President of South Korea,” the man in the black suit answered. “What other president is there?” 

Seungri waited until they were alone in the restaurant again. “Who is he?” 

“Seunghyun?” Jiyong asked. “He’s a business man…” 

Big Bang just looked at each other, surprised and shocked. “Why is he getting called by the President?” 

Jiyong shrugged, stuffing more food in his mouth. “Maybe he wants a contract negotiated?” 

Seungri was getting a little upset. He wasn’t used to not being the most important person in the room, and the guy who’s man he was intent on stealing was getting called on by the President of South Korea because of a contract? 

Jiyong and Seungri hailed a taxi when everything was over to get back home in. Seungri tried hitting on Jiyong a few times, but Jiyong completely ignored his attempts and kept steering the conversation back into brother territory. He wasn’t rude about it, but he was firm and insistent. 

Jiyong’s grandparents had dinner on the table, and Jiyong kept looking out the window, waiting for Seunghyun. He took a seat next to the window so that he could wait, and not even his mother asking him questions could make him move away. 

Seunghyun came in later that night, and Jiyong hugged him. He really didn’t like being away from him, and he had no idea why it was so strong inside of him. They didn’t kiss each other in front of Jiyong’s family, but they went back and sat with them on the couch. 

Jiyong’s grandparents looked on Seunghyun fondly, so glad that their grandson’s best friend had turned out to be such a good boy. Seungri sat on the couch across from them, seething in jealousy. Misuk couldn’t keep her eyes off Seunghyun and didn’t even bother trying to hide her interest that night, but Jiyong was the one that Seunghyun was paying attention to. 

“I have to go back to America tomorrow night,” Seunghyun said apologetically to Jiyong’s parents. “I’m sorry that I’m cutting plans so short…” 

“Your dad called today,” Mr. Kwon said. “He said he wanted to come by and talk to you tomorrow…” 

Seunghyun froze, and Jiyong felt the tension in the room fill as Seunghyun tried to think about how he could politely say no. There wasn’t a way, there wasn’t anything that he could do about it. 

“Seunghyun and I should probably get some rest for tomorrow, then,” Jiyong said, smiling at his family. “I’ll be going back to America with Seunghyun tomorrow. I hope that you come to visit us there, we have a very nice home that you’re welcome to stay in…” 

“You two live together?” Seungri asked. 

“Yes,” Jiyong said, standing up. “Good night, mom, grandma and grandpa. Good night, Seungri,” Jiyong said, and he took an almost comatose Seunghyun upstairs. 

He dressed his lover in his sleeping clothing, washed his unresponsive face, and then tucked him into their bed, holding him close. “I’m here, baby,” he whispered into his ear.

“I was going to make you stay with them this afternoon, where you have so much opportunity. Forgive me for being selfish Jiyong, ‘cause I need you next to me for this, baby. I need you so bad…” 

“Nothin’ to forgive, baby,” Jiyong said, holding him close. “I’ll be your strength when you don’t have any more. I’ll be your shelter, so don’t be afraid to look to me, all right?”

Seunghyun was shaking, and his grip on Jiyong was so tight that it really hurt, but Jiyong didn’t say anything. He held Seunghyun in his arms until the other man fell asleep, exhausted from fright and worry. Jiyong wondered exactly how he was going to be able to keep his promises. 

 

The meeting started off wrong, and it just got worse. Seunghyun sat in the Kwon’s living room with Jiyong, and Jiyong’s mother and Seungri were there for some God only knows reason, but Mae couldn’t meet up with Suwan Choi. Seunghyun told her that he understood, because he really did, and she stayed at her family’s home next door. 

“It’s been a long time, son,” Suwan smiled at his boy. 

“Not long enough,” Seunghyun said, hostility dripping off of his lips. He took a drink of coffee that was sitting in front of him, controlling himself so that he didn’t throw the steaming liquid in his father’s face.

“Aw, don’t be that way kid, it wasn’t that bad living with your old man, was it?” Suwan flashed a charming grin at Misuk and Seungri, who seemed to buy it. At least Jiyong could see where Seunghyun got his charisma from, even if this man’s charisma was oily.

“Why are you here?” Seunghyun asked, cutting through the crap. 

“I just wanted to catch up on old times. How is your mother?” 

“She’s none of your business. Oh, and she’s married to one of the best fathers a boy could possibly want…” 

“It helps to have that much money,” Suwan said, “It was always hard making ends meet when I was younger…” 

Seunghyun rolled his eyes. “If you think money had anything to do…” 

“I do. Which is basically why I came by today. You’re horning in on my business. Selling to the Korean police department and the military? On top of that, you’re practically giving them away…” 

“You don’t have the production to sell in the quantities that I sell, Choi,” Seunghyun spit out. “You don’t have the innovation to sell what I sell. Why don’t you just stick to your back alley dealings and leave the job to the professionals?” 

“I want your connections,” Suwan leaned forward intently. “All I need is one little measly handout from you, and you owe me. You better give me a good introduction, or I’ll…” 

“What will you do, Choi, beat me?” Seunghyun asked, looking into his father’s face just as intently. 

“I’ll tell everyone that your little boyfriend right there is her son and a fag on top of it,” Suwan had an evil grin on his face when Misuk gasped in shock. Seungri looked pissed. 

“Do it,” Seunghyun said. “I don’t care, we live in America. I take him along on most of my business meetings where I practically molest him in front of my clients, daddy dearest. They fucking love it.” 

“It will hurt her reputation,” Suwan said, jerking his head at Misuk. “It will destroy her son’s band.” 

“No it won’t,” Seunghyun said. “Koreans value education and money, not necessarily in that order. I have both. On top of that, I’m pretty. Plus, all Jiyong and I have to do is show up with a pretty girl on our arm at a few shindigs over here and you’ll look like you’re trying to blackmail me, which is what you’re doing. No one will buy your crap, especially about two guys they don’t even care about.” 

Suwan smirked. “You leave me no choice. I’ll just have to shoot your boyfriend then…” 

Seunghyun had a gun at his father’s temple before anyone else in the room could blink. “Not if I shoot you first.” 

“You think you can pull the trigger?” Suwan laughed in his face. 

“You have no idea how badly I want to,” Seunghyun said. “You or any of your little fuckers take one look at Jiyong and I’ll have so many assassins after you they’ll be gunning each other down to get a piece of you. And I will pay for them to bring you to me, in pieces. I’ll make them let you go after they cut off a finger, or an ear, or a toe, and I will make them keep coming after you, one at a time until you are nothing but a stump, motherfucker. And then when you can’t run because your legs are gone, and you can’t defend yourself because your arms are gone, and you can’t plead for help because your tongue is gone, I will fucking cut your head from your shoulders. You are a sick, sad little man and you’d better just keep in mind that I’m waiting for an excuse to hurt you.” 

Suwan pulled a gun on his son, and held it to his son’s temple. “You must not have learned your lesson if you think that I can be intimidated by words, little boy,” he sneered. “I want that introduction, and I want it today.” 

Jiyong stood up. He pulled another gun out of the back of Seunghyun’s pants, and he held it to Suwan’s temple. “Get that gun off of my man right now,” he said calmly. 

Suwan saw murder written in Jiyong’s eyes, murder and hate. He backed up and took his gun off of Seunghyun. 

“Now boys, let’s put our guns away,” Misuk said calmly, sipping on her tea. “There’s something that I would like to say here.” 

Jiyong and Seunghyun were so startled by Jiyong’s mother that they took their guns off of Suwan’s temple. Seunghyun put the safety back on his gun and put both of the guns in the back of his pants, where he had two holsters set up for that very purpose. 

“First of all, Suwan, you should probably remember that I am one of the most sought-after actresses in Korea. If Seunghyun or my son were to actually shoot you, I would simply tell a judge that it was in self-defense, that they stole the gun from you, and that they saved my life and that of my son, one of Korea’s most beloved idols. This would catapult both of these boys into national heroes over night. And I am a good enough actress that the President would award them medals of honor over it.

“Secondly, and I think that this is something that you forget also Suwan, I was there when Seunghyun was growing up. If you thought that I would leave you in a room alone with my son, you must have been crazy. I was a little curious to see if you had changed, but you have not. I suggest that you leave my son’s grandparents house with a quickness in your step, because I have already informed the police as to your whereabouts and apparently, they want you for trafficking not only weapons, but girls, too. They’ll be here within fifteen minutes. Don’t threaten my family again.”

Suwan was up and out the door before the last words were out of Misuk’s perfectly lipsticked mouth. She continued sipping her tea to the amazement of the awed young men around her. 

“Mom,” Seungri said, shocked. “Did you just talk down a gangster?” 

“It’s not like I did it out of the goodness of my heart, Seungri. God, you act like you don’t even know your own mother,” Misuk said, undressing Seunghyun with her eyes. 

“What do you want, mom?” Jiyong asked, past the point of manners. She might have saved his lover’s life, might have prevented him from going to prison for manslaughter, but she obviously wanted something and Jiyong didn’t know if he was going to be able to give it to her.

“I want Seunghyun to model for one of my magazine spreads,” Misuk said. “It will only take 6-10 hours. It’s just a real short shoot for Elle Magazine, and we’ll be done before your plane leaves for the States.” 

“Fine,” Seunghyun agreed. “Let’s go.” 

Jiyong was laughing at the awkward look on Seunghyun’s face as he left with his mother. He got up off the couch to stretch, but then he sat back down when he saw the look that Seungri was giving him. “I’m with Seunghyun,” Jiyong told the boy.

Seungri smiled. “He’s not here right now,” he said.

“No, I mean that Seunghyun and I are together. We’re boyfriends.” 

Seungri tilted his head to the side. “What does that have to do with anything?” 

“You keep looking at me like you’re going to eat me,” Jiyong said, “I just wanted you to know that I’m with someone.” 

“I don’t want to eat you,” Seungri said with a smile. “I still want in your pants, regardless of our being brothers or whatever. I don’t care who that guy is, I still want you. You’re not territory, so he’s got no claim.” 

Jiyong looked at his younger brother. “If that’s the language you speak, then let me rephrase. I’m not interested in you.” 

Seungri smiled again. “Yet.” 

Jiyong rolled his eyes and then walked up to his room to finish packing his and Seunghyun’s bags. Then, he went downstairs to spend the remaining hours he had in Korea with his grandparents, who thought he was the best thing since sliced bread. 

Seunghyun was in some sort of luxury hotel. He hadn’t ever modeled before, but he was good at faking. He used all the skills that his father had taught him to act like he was interested in this woman that he hoped to make his mother-in-law one day.

“You know how I feel about your son?” Seunghyun asked while he sat in the bathtub and she smoked a cigarette on the edge of it.

“I don’t care. You and I look hot together, and that’s all that I need from you. I hope you don’t plan to keep house with my boy in some seedy hotel.” 

“I have a nice house for your son, and I’ll buy him anything he wants.” 

“What exactly do you do, Seunghyun? What makes you so sure that you can take care of my boy?” 

“What do you want, Misuk? Do you want this hotel? I’ll buy it for you. Do you want to own all that jewelry you’re wearing? I can buy you that, too. Money is a joke to me, making your son happy is my goal.” 

Misuk looked at him, unbuttoning her shirt at the photographer’s direction. “My son doesn’t even see me as a mother. Why would you buy me anything?” 

“Because he wants a mother. He wants someone to take care of him and love him like a mother,” Seunghyun said. He was willing to buy a mother for Jiyong, if she didn’t want to be one for any maternal reasons. “You should have seen the way he lapped up the attention my mother paid him. If you try loving him, he won’t let you ever regret it.” 

“Are you sure?” Misuk asked, as Seunghyun stood up, towering over her. He looked down at her as the director told him to put his arms around her and she slipped her hands into the waistband of his pants. He was kind of startled that she sounded like she was scared of being Jiyong’s mother.

“Positive,” Seunghyun said. “Just give him half a chance.” 

The photoshoot went quickly, and Seunghyun took a thoughtful Misuk home to Jiyong. Misuk hugged Jiyong, the first time since she had seen him and hugged him in greeting, and that meant that Seunghyun had to hold a crying Jiyong on the way to the airport. 

From then on, it was a mad rush again to get from plane to plane, dragging a sleeping Jiyong and his mother and their luggage, and by the end of it Seunghyun was exhausted. They got home to where Seunghyun’s new house was in Raleigh, and Mae went to the room that Seunghyun kept for her on the ground floor. 

Seunghyun put Jiyong in his bed, and he made sure their luggage was where it was supposed to be, and then he climbed in next to Jiyong and fell into an exhausted slumber.

Jiyong woke him up several hours later, sucking on his fingers. 

Seunghyun opened his mouth to say something, but Jiyong put his finger against Seunghyun’s lips, tracing them gently with the very tip of his finger. “Shh…” Jiyong insisted. “Every time you talk this gets put off, so you’re not allowed to say a word.” 

Seunghyun didn’t know if he could talk even if he wanted to, the fingers that had been tracing his lips were now tracing the curve of his eyebrow and the whirl of his ear and Jiyong’s tongue was cupped around his fingers in a wet cocoon. Seunghyun did moan though, when his finger slipped out of Jiyong’s mouth and Jiyong sucked it back in with a quickness. He pulled his own fingers out of Jiyong’s mouth so that he could paint Jiyong’s lips with the wet, and then he kissed his boyfriend. 

Jiyong’s mouth tasted of toothpaste, and Seunghyun briefly worried about his breath because he had been sleeping but Jiyong didn’t seem to care at all. He felt his lover’s tongue sweep into his mouth and pull his taste out back into his own, and Seunghyun chased his tongue with his own, sliding up against Jiyong’s and pressing his lips against Jiyong’s. He ran his fingers though Jiyong’s hair, touching his ear and the side of his neck. 

Jiyong pressed Seunghyun back into the mattress, biting his chin a little as he kissed his way down his collar bones, nibbling on his chest, and then sucking on a suddenly ridiculously sensitive nipple. He ran his fingers down Seunghyun’s chest, flittering over hipbones long enough that Seunghyun thought he was going to die, and then Jiyong wrapped his fingers around Seunghyun’s shaft, squeezing gently. 

Seunghyun moaned, his hips moving just fine in time to Jiyong’s strokes. He opened his eyes slightly to see that Jiyong had filled their room with roses, and he saw a bottle of champagne sitting in a bucket of ice, the cork already popped and waiting for them. 

“Jiyong, when did you…” 

Jiyong kissed Seunghyun, really intent on him not talking. He pressed him back into the bed and pushed one long finger slowly inside of him, moaning at the feel of his muscles clamping down around that single digit. 

Seunghyun ran his hands down Jiyong’s back, squeezing his ass and pulling his dick up against his own, loving the way that they felt rubbing together. Jiyong pulled his own dick with Seunghyun’s, stroking both of them to give himself a little relief from the tension that was filling his bones. 

Seunghyun’s hips kept moving, and Jiyong pulled a bottle out from somewhere. “You first or me?” he asked, biting Seunghyun’s lower lip. 

Seunghyun whimpered a little, kissing Jiyong harder. “You, baby, I want you inside.” 

Jiyong smiled in triumph, and he coated his finger with enough lubricant to fuck an elephant, making his fingers slide back into Seunghyun, stretching him out.

Seunghyun whimpered again, digging his heels against the mattress as he kissed Jiyong harder, jerked his hips against Jiyong’s invasion, and then moaned when Jiyong added a third finger. 

“God baby, it’s so right. Please honey,” Seunghyun begged. 

Jioyng smiled as he positioned himself between Seunghyun’s legs. He pulled on Seunghyun’s sack lightly while he pressed himself in, pleased when Seunghyun’s voice rose in pitch without any control. Jiyong slid his hips back and then pushed back in, his eyes almost rolling at how tight Seunghyun clenched around him. He was so hot inside, so hot and the lube was so wet, Jiyong knew that it wasn’t going to be long for him. 

Seunghyun felt Jiyong rubbing against his passage, hitting his spot with almost perfect aim and accuracy. Every time he bumped against his prostate little flashes of white light hit Seunghyun’s eyes. His eyes traced a drop of sweat that started at Jiyong’s temple and slowly worked its way down his face, down his neck, and settled at the tip of Jiyong’s collar bone, where Seunghyun stuck out his tongue to lick it off. He followed the curve of Jiyong’s clavicle all the way up to his ear, sucking on his lobe a little before he traced the shell of Jiyong’s ear with his tongue and then bit the spot right below it, making his own mark on Jiyong, smiling at the sounds coming out of Jiyong’s mouth. 

Jiyong got harder inside Seunghyun, and his hips moved faster, and Seunghyun knew it was no longer about him but about how he could make he other man feel. He lifted his hips to meet his lover’s thrusts, screamed in delight when Jiyong’s hands grasped at his body, and then came all over himself when he saw Jiyong’s top teeth sinking into his bottom lip and he made a sound like he was in pain. 

They lay together until Jiyong had slipped out of Seunghyun, his ecstasy dripping out of Seunghyun’s body. They kissed each other a few more times, and then Jiyong sat up to pour them both glasses of champagne. 

“I hope that I did it right,” Jiyong said.

“Oh, most definitely…” 

“I mean the roses and the champagne. I know that we fucked perfectly, I always knew we were going to fuck perfectly together. I just wanted to do the atmosphere right…” 

Seunghyun brought Jiyong’s champagne stained lips to his own, kissing him deeply. “I love you so goddamn much,” he said between kisses. “So fucking much that it hurts.” 

Jiyong smiled at his lover. “Seunghyun…” 

“I know we talked about it, and shit I really wanted to get you a ring first baby, but marry me? Fucking marry me, please?” 

Jiyong laughed. “I thought you were all about romance?” 

“Not when I want something this badly,” Seunghyun said, a blush stealing up his cheeks.

Jiyong smiled tenderly at his lover, “Yes baby, I’ll marry you,” and he kissed him, long and deep, with his heart on the tip of his tongue. He wove his fingers through Seunghyun’s, tracing the whorls of his fingertips, bringing them up to his mouth again where he kissed the tips of every single one of them. “I can’t wait to spend forever with you.” 

 

Seunghyun and Dongwook sat on the back porch of the house Jiyong had picked out, after Seunghyun had given his old house to Dongwook and Amanda for a baby gift. They were sipping beer and, for the most part, hiding from the wedding planner and their significant others. 

“How do they do this?” Dongwook asked. “I mean, really?” 

“I’m surprised Jiyong took to this planning thing the way he did,” Seunghyun said. “I almost feel betrayed as a man.” 

“He’s got good taste though. I think that wedding planner has ambitions of employing him…” 

Seunghyun smiled dreamily. “If it makes Jiyong happy…” 

“You’re such a lovesick fool,” Dongwook rolled his eyes. “I can’t believe that you cater to his every whim the way you do. You need to put your foot down and tell him no once in a while, just so he knows he can’t walk all over you…” 

“Wookie?” Amanda’s voice came out from the back door.

“Coming dear,” Dongwook answered, glaring at Seunghyun as he laughed his ass off at Dongwook who was getting his ass up with a quickness. 

Seunghyun followed his partner-in-crime, walking through the Great Room into the kitchen, where Jiyong sat with Misuk, Mae, Dongwook’s mother Isabelle, and Mrs. Skarsgard. They all had an opinion on what they wanted, and they discussed it loudly while Dongwook sat behind Amanda rubbing her seven moth belly. 

“No, I think we should have am old fashioned soda fountain type candy bar for the kids attending the dinner,” Jiyong said. “And they should have their own buffet line, too: chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese and French fries. That way, if they don’t want to eat Korean food…” 

“Have y’all decided on colors yet?” Seunghyun asked from the door way. 

Jiyong looked up from his deep conversation with the wedding planner. The smile on his face could have lit up the night sky. “We’ve decided to keep everything sepia toned, so pink and lavender and pale yellow with creams and browns and tans…”

“It’s going to be beautiful,” Heechul Kim, the wedding planner, announced. “With all the windows in the reception hall, and all of the white candles lit inside of those glass bowls of water, it will look like an old photograph come to life.” 

“Seungri’s band is going to play at seven o’clock,” Misuk announced, “but before that we’re going to have a string quartet to play music while people are eating…” 

“Jiyong’s going to sing Seunghyun a song!” Mae announced. 

“That was supposed to be a surprise, Mae!” Amanda chided, laughing as Seunghyun smiled at his lover. 

“Now I’m going to have to think of something else to surprise him with,” Jiyong said, smiling at Mae. 

“We’re going to have horse-drawn carriages take everyone from the parking lot to the reception hall because it’s so far away,” Amanda announced. 

“How many people are coming to this double wedding, anyway?” Mrs. Skarsgard asked. 

“Everyone we know,” Jiyong said with a smile. “It’s going to be a crazy mix of my beach friends, Amanda’s sorority, Seunghyun’s fraternity, and Dongwook’s parents construction connections…” 

“Are you really a member of Skull & Bones?” Misuk asked, interested. 

“It’s not like it’s that big of a deal,” Seunghyun said.

“So, your fraternity brothers have been both President Bushes and President Obama?” 

“Look…” Seunghyun started to say. 

“So you’re saying the President is coming to this wedding?” Heechul asked. “You really needed to tell me that before, there are so many details that I need to have…” and then Heechul fell silent as Alexander walked into the kitchen through the door on the wraparound porch. 

“Hey,” Alexander held a hand up in greeting. He set his bag on the kitchen’s hardwood floor. He only looked at Seunghyun for a few minutes, and then he looked at the floor and over at Jiyong. He looked at Amanda and smiled. “You look beautiful, little sister.” 

“Come here and hug me,” Amanda commanded him. “I can’t stand up without lots of help.” 

Alexander picked his little sister up, squeezing her gently before putting her down again. “I just came to wish everyone happy wedding plans, and to say that everyone from my company is going to be coming…”

“Oh my God, it’s Alexander Skarsgard,” Heechul couldn’t stop himself from saying. How many times had he spanked it to images of this man walking down the cat walk? Heechul had created his own fan page on the Internet to this man and spent hours maintaining it. He should have recognized that this was his family, as strange as it sounded, when he was introduced to Amanda’s mother as Mrs. Skarsgard. His heart fluttered in his chest as he finally met his idol and he had to work on not jumping up and down and screaming.

Alexander looked over at Heechul, surprised at the beautiful man sitting at the kitchen table with his family. “What do you do Amanda, just surround yourself with beautiful Asian men?” 

“Every chance I get,” Amanda laughed. She was glad that her step-brother could joke about the situation. He looked and sounded so much better now then he did only a few weeks ago, when she saw him at one of his shows.

Jiyong stood up and held his hand out to Alexander. “Hey,” he said, “It’s good to see you.”

Alexander shook Jiyong’s hand and then pulled him in for a hug. “It’s good to see you, too…” he could say with almost 100% honesty. 

Seunghyun smiled, laughing at himself trying not to think dirty thoughts at the sight of his lover and his ex-lover hugging. He shrugged and then walked over to Alexander, who hugged him, too. “Good to see my step-sister’s step-brother,” Alexander said, letting him go only a little relunctantly. “How’s the wedding planning?”

“It’s cute,” Seunghyun said. “Jiyong and Amanda are having a blast with it.” 

Alexander laughed, “Glad to hear that,” he said, “I would hate it. You chose the right man,” Alexander was trying to be a good man, and by saying that he felt better about himself even if he didn’t feel great about the situation.

Heechul smiled at Alexander, “I’ll plan your wedding for you.” 

“Um…” Alexander said, tugging at the collar on his shirt, “I have to get a girlfriend first…” 

Heechul rolled his eyes. “I can take care of that little problem, too…” He thought it was kind of cute the way that Alexander was playing straight. 

Alexander swallowed nervously. “Hyun, your wedding planner is scaring me…”

Mrs. Skarsgard laughed. “Heechul’s harmless,” she said, “now get over here and hug your evil step-mother.” 

Alexander hugged Amanda’s mother, and then he sat down at the table with his family. Things might not be perfect in his opinion, but a person only got one family in life so it was best to support the ones that you had. “What can I do to help?” he asked. 

The planning session lasted for a long time, and finally Heechul had enough things to do to keep him happy until they met again in two days. Jiyong sneaked him Alexander’s cell phone number, too, so he needed to get home to figure out a plan to get Alexander alone. 

The rest of the family visited for a while, but it was getting late so soon the Skarsgards, Dongwook, Amanda, and Isabelle left to go to Dongwook’s and Amanda’s houses. Misuk and Mae went to stay in their rooms upstairs, and Seunghyun and Jiyong were left alone in the kitchen.

“Is this what you want?” Seunghyun made sure.

“Yes. Is it okay? I want everyone to know that you’re really mine,” Jiyong admitted. 

“I could get a tee-shirt made. ‘Property of Jiyong Kwon,’” Seunghyun said, pulling the smaller man onto his lap.

“This says it with a little more class than a tee-shirt,” Jiyong said, leaning his head on Seunghyun’s shoulder. 

Seunghyun kissed Jiyong’s forehead and then he leaned his cheek against his head. “Anything to make you happy,” he said, smiling against his lover’s head. 

Jiyong leaned up and kissed Seunghyun, slow and deep. He threaded his fingers through Seunghyun’s short black hair, wishing that there were words to express the way that he felt. He hoped that Seunghyun was still going to be happy about the wedding surprise he had planned for him, and about the song he was going to sing for him at the reception, and that he would do a good job singing… 

Except that he was having problems worrying because Seunghyun’s lips were working at his jawline, and Seunghyun’s hands were gripping his hips and then reaching up his shirt and down into his pants, trailing those long fingers against him and setting the skin of his body on fire.

“Our moms are here,” Jiyong gasped into Seunghyun’s mouth.

“You think they don’t know what we do?” Seunghyun licked the underside of Jiyong’s jaw.

“I don’t want to…” Seunghyun’s finger drew a line from the top of the crease where Jiyong’s thigh met his hip, all the way down to the middle of his groin. Jiyong’s eyes rolled to the back of his head as he struggled to remember what he was talking about.

Seunghyun took his hands out of Jiyong’s clothing so that he could pick the other man up, kissing him again. He nuzzled Jiyong’s neck, lipping the skin there so that he could take little tastes of Jiyong into his mouth. He took him across the Great Room into the Master Bedroom, where he spread Jiyong out on their king sized bed. 

Jiyong smiled down at Seunghyun crawling down his body, using his mouth to take off Jiyong’s clothing. “Damn, I love you,” he said, gasping for breath when Seunghyun’s tongue traced funny patterns on his stomach.

Seunghyun might have said something that was in English, but Jiyong couldn’t make out any familiar words. It didn’t help that he couldn’t remove his mouth from Jiyong’s body, and Jiyong wasn’t complaining. He enjoyed the way Seunghyun’s voice rumbled along his body, enjoyed the way his cock was straining to slide between Seunghyun’s lips. 

Seunghyun was being a rat bastard about it though. Jiyong tried not to laugh. He bit the tops of Jiyong’s thighs, licked all of the lines of his body, slid his tongue up the side of his sack, and basically did everything but wrap his lips around his silky cock. Jiyong was a writhing mess of need and then Seunghyun took one long wet lick up the center of his erection. 

He almost came from that move alone, and he had to bury his hands in Seunghyun’s hair to hold him still for a second as he got control. “God baby,” he begged, “you’re gonna drive me up a wall…” 

Seunghyun smiled up at him, the deep dimple in the side of his face compelling Jiyong to draw a line down it with his finger, and then he looked down and slid his lips over Jiyong’s cock, cupping Jiyong’s balls in the palm of one hand while gripping the base of his dick in the other. 

Jiyong moaned then, loudly and with no control over himself whatsoever. He felt Seunghyun’s fingers nudging at his entrance, and somehow they had been coated in lubricant while Jiyong hadn’t been paying attention. He must have been distracted with something else.

That something else was currently coating Jiyong’s cock in saliva, a wet sucking wonderland that caused Jiyong’s back to arch involuntarily so he could cram more of his dick into Seunghyun’s beautiful mouth. He was past the point of being concerned about choking him, needing to feel more of his mouth and more wet and more tight around him because he was so close. 

He could feel his body opening slowly for Seunghyun’s fingers, blossoming like a slow flower, and he pushed against the intrusion to let Seunghyun’s fingers sink deeper. He wanted to ride his lover, and his body was taking its damn sweet time about it and driving Jiyong crazier than Seunghyun’s mouth. Seunghyun’s long slender fingers pumped slow strokes into Jiyong’s hole, and then he found his spot.

Jiyong was making a high keening sound, begging and encouraging and pleading for his sanity. White sparks flew in front of his eyes but all he could hear was Seunghyun’s breathing and all he could concentrate on was Seunghyun’s scent as his body jerked its way towards completion. He had no control over his hips, jerking and shoving into and around and under Seunghyun. 

Finally, finally he felt Seunghyun pushing his way into Jiyong’s body. It was like Seunghyun’s dick was created to hit Jiyong’s prostate, and it did every single time Seunghyun surged into his body. Jiyong wrapped his ankles around Seunghyun’s neck, loving how deep it made Seunghyun go, loving the face that Seunghyun made every time he did it. 

Seunghyun made a kind of high pitched whimper, helpless against the power of Jiyong’s body clenching around his. He felt himself breaking inside of Jiyong, felt his heart melting out of his chest and tears forming in his eyes as he got closer and closer. 

He wrapped his hand around Jiyong’s shaft, sliding his hand up and down, proud to see how turned on Jiyong was by what was going on. He had done that to him, Seunghyun Choi had made Jiyong Kwon want him so badly that he was leaking like a sieve, dripping down the angry looking flushed red skin of his deire. Seunghyun stroked it a few times and Jiyong tensed up and then came in three strong pulses, setting Seunghyun off inside of Jiyong.

They lay there, connected by Jiyong’s cum and their sweat, trying to catch their breath. They kissed a few times before they got up to go to the bathroom and wash each other off. “God I love you,” Seunghyun said. “I’m so lucky that the man I fell in love with is so good in bed.” 

Jiyong smiled. “We always knew we would be good together,” he repeated himself from after the first time that they had made love. He leaned up to kiss Seunghyun, and then smiled at him. “I want to show you something,” he grinned from ear to ear. 

Seunghyun tried not laughing at the expression on his face, but it was hard. He followed Jiyong after dragging on a pair of sleeping pants, and Jiyong dragged him into the little attached sitting room attached to their bedroom.

He had chased Seunghyun out and forbidden him from coming into the room for almost two weeks, so Seunghyun stared in wonder as he surveyed the walls.

Jiyong had repainted his fantasy land on the walls, recreating the dragons and the fairies and the elves and the gnomes. He painted little woodland creatures and blended them in, but the part that almost killed Seunghyun was the presence of the brownies, front and center in the middle of the forest floor, wearing little aprons, one holding a duster behind its back and the other holding a large spoon, looking up from their homely faces at Seunghyun and Jiyong. 

“Oh baby,” Seunghyun said, pulling Jiyong into his arms. “Oh honey, it’s beautiful,” he buried his face in Jiyong’s hair so that he couldn’t see his tears, but Jiyong pulled him into his arms too and kissed the crystal drops off of his face. It wasn’t fair that Seunghyun was so beautiful crying the way that he was.

“It’s my wedding surprise,” Jiyong told him with a grin. “I wanted you to have your brownies.” 

Seunghyun stared at the wall in wonder, and then he turned his face to Jiyong. “You are so amazing,” he told him. “The things you do to my heart, Jiyong Kwon. I feel like it’s been turned inside out,” he confessed. 

Jiyong leaned up to kiss his lover again, relieved that they were finally together and getting married in only three weeks. It felt like a fairy tale come true.

“I remembered something today, from when we were kids,” Jiyong said. He looked at Seunghyun carefully.

“Yeah?” Seunghyun asked. He loved hearing about Jiyong and himself when they were children. It served as a reminder that not everything about his childhood had been bad and even more importantly, there were parts of it that were amazing.

“Do you remember drinking a bottle of soju thinking that it was water?” Jiyong asked him. He searched his face carefully, looking for any sort of awareness on Seunghyun’s part.

Seunghyun paused for a minute. Slowly, the images and memories that he had hidden away in his very secret place came back to him. “You were six, I was seven. I thought that was a dream…” 

“That was our first kiss, Hyunnie,” Jiyong told him. “That was the first time our lips touched. You used tongue, too,” Jiyong teased him while he laughed. “We kissed well, then, too.” 

Seunghyun looked at Jiyong in shock. “I had forgotten all about that,” he said. The memory came back to him clearly as he held Jiyong tighter. The images of them with that green bottle underneath the kitchen table came back to him with staggering clarity. “We really are meant to be together.” 

Jioyng laughed, wrapping his arms around Seunghyun’s waist. “You just now are thinking that we’re meant to be?” 

“No,” Seunghyun whispered. “It’s just, the world proving it to me over and over is a little intimidating. Do you think everyone gets undeniable proof that they’re supposed to be with someone the way that we do?” 

“Probably not, but then again I don’t think that everyone gets to marry their soul mate the way that we do,” Jiyong leaned up on his tip toes to kiss Seunghyun’s neck. 

“I love you, Jiyong,” Seunghyun whispered as he leaned down to kiss his lover. “My heart aches for you.” 

“I’m right here, Seunghyun, and I’m never going anywhere.” Jiyong threaded his fingers through Seunghyun’s hair, pulling his mouth down to his own as he showed him physically how he truly felt.


End file.
